When did you start to socialize?

devinjonesrn · July 2011

I'm going crazy. We just moved to a new place and I feel so alone being in the house all day with the babies to keep them from getting sick. When did you start taking them to friends' houses, play dates, MOPS etc?

I figure we'll go back into hiding for RSV season, but its summer, and I'd like to get out of the house now. Thoughts?

damabo80 · July 2011

We went on our first "non-dr" outing today to lunch (just DH and I and the baby).

We're going to a friend's house tomorrow for a BBQ. I think the main thing is to be smart about it. We won't pass her around like a bowl of chips, we'll keep any germy toddlers from touching her, and we'll have hand sanitizer on hand for anyone who *really really* wants to hold her (after we quiz them about if they have been around any illness in the last week). It will be mostly outside (which is good, as germs don't hop around as much outside), and it's not flu season around here. I plan on holding her the majority of the time, and we'll probably only stay for 1-2 hours.

I'm going to go into hiding (for the most part) this winter, so the thought of not taking her ANYWHERE until next spring sucks.

urbanflowerpot · July 2011

I started to socialize DS immediately. NICU is, of course, very sterile so I had people in there with me. They came to keep me company, but I always offered to let them hold him. There's something about being too germ-free that doesn't seem healthy to me. Even if he got sick tomorrow we've made it over three months without a single bug. I carry him in a wrap so strangers have never tried to touch - he's come to a restaurant and shops. We attended our Bible study social last week and while everyone talked to him, nobody requested to hold him. I don't know if I have an odd social circle or what, but nobody gets up in our faces. Parents won't allow their children near us - I don't have to ask. Even my delightful 12 year old friend chose to stay away at the social because she woke up feeling 'off' that morning and didn't want to risk it. The only thing I've been avoiding due to germs is public transit.

rachel06 · July 2011

urbanflowerpot:
I started to socialize DS immediately. NICU is, of course, very sterile so I had people in there with me. They came to keep me company, but I always offered to let them hold him. There's something about being too germ-free that doesn't seem healthy to me. Even if he got sick tomorrow we've made it over three months without a single bug. I carry him in a wrap so strangers have never tried to touch - he's come to a restaurant and shops. We attended our Bible study social last week and while everyone talked to him, nobody requested to hold him. I don't know if I have an odd social circle or what, but nobody gets up in our faces. Parents won't allow their children near us - I don't have to ask. Even my delightful 12 year old friend chose to stay away at the social because she woke up feeling 'off' that morning and didn't want to risk it. The only thing I've been avoiding due to germs is public transit.

I agree with a lot of this. We had a few close friends & family come & visit in the NICU. I took him out for the first time last week to meet DH for lunch twice & to the store. No one held him or anything those times. While at the store I carried him in my Ergo. Last night we went to a festival & again I carried him in my Ergo. Our pedi told us to limit things the first 4 weeks. Now we're just being smart about things. We haven't had any issues with people being in our faces either. Last week we had our first real visitors & everyone was really respectful.

Natalie_may · July 2011

We were also told to limit things for the first four weeks, which convieniently got us until may 1. We started very slowly and kept events small and minimized public places for an additional month. Now that they are 3 months adjusted and 6 (!) actual we do a lot more in public. We still are careful about who holds the babies but we let them get a bit more social exposure now. (we will go back on lockdown this winter as well.)

OscarQ · July 2011

Kevin came home at 5 weeks adjusted on April 21st. We started socializing about two weeks later - having a few friends over the house and then we slowly increased the number of people involved and the places we went. Last weekend at just over six months actual, three months adjusted, we took Kevin to a large family reunion. In August we're having a large party for him at my in-laws.

prazenjc · July 2011

we started socializing and going out w/LO around a month after he came home from the hospital w/us.

Fancy3Face · July 2011

My babies are younger than yours so my opinion is probably moot, but we still are apprehensive. We went to a bbq a couple weeks ago and there was a 3 year old there with a hideous cough. I thought I was "ready", but I've been obsessing about this kid's cough and just recently found out from the mom that it was alergies, not pertussis/whooping cough or something horrid. The fact that I was so obsessive about that leads me to think that I need a tad bit more time before I get them involved in play groups, etc. Most of my friends here don't have kids or have kids that are toddlers anyway.

I agree though, I want to get them out and about!

I love your daughter's name btw Great minds think alike!

sail123 · July 2011

We always allowed visitors, as long as they were not sick and washed their hands once they came to our place. Once my boys were four months old (which coincided with the end of RSV season) we started taking them out, going to playgroups etc. I'm still careful and cautious but try not to be overly so.

devinjonesrn · July 2011

Thanks for the input everyone! We're going to go to a squadron function this Friday and hopefully there won't be too many that ask to hold them...then comes the awkward, do you say "yes, if you wash your hands" or "well, they are preemies, so we try not to pass them around"?

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