third loss....seriously??? — The Bump
Miscarriage/Pregnancy Loss

third loss....seriously???

So this is our third loss in six months (12 weeks, 6 weeks and 6 1/2 weeks)....obviously our problem is not with conception.  I feel like I'm numb this time because I have been expecting a loss ever since our surprise positive pregnancy test two weeks ago, but I was still completely shocked when I saw nothing on the ultrasound today after seeing a heartbeat just yesterday.  How does that even happen?  Now our doctor is referring us to a reproductive endocrinologist for repetitive pregnancy loss.  I am from a family of three generations of only women who have babies like they are going to wal-mart?.labor is only three hours max, epidurals are out of the question.  How can I be having this much trouble?  Thankfully we were sure not spread the news this time.  I?m not sure I could handle ?the look? from all of my pregnant friends after our third loss.  I?m sick of being the pitiful friend who just can?t make it work.  It may suck, but I much rather cry alone to my husband after every baby shower, birth and birthday than go through the struggle publicly.  Is the third loss the onset of bitterness?

Re: third loss....seriously???

  • Im so sorry for your losses. This is my first loss and I'm bitter, if that makes you feel any better. Vent and cry here. Hopefully the doctors will be able to figure stuff out for you.
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  • I know how you feel to see the heartbeat one day and nothing the next. The very same thing happened to me. It still boggles me as to how it could have happened.

    I hope you are able to find success with this new doctor and I am so sorry for your losses. *hugs* 

    BFP 1: 3/25/11 -- m/c: 4/21/11 @ 9w 2d

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  • I understand how you feel. I've lost track of how to tell the difference between the bitterness, anger, sadness, inadequacy. I'm sorry this is happening. ((hugs))
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    BFP #4: 8/11/11. EDD: 4/19/12. Beta #1: 33 on 8/12. Beta #2: 104 on 8/14. Beta #3: 1320 on 8/20. Beta#4: 12291 on 8/27. Heartbeat! Beta #5: 38857 on 9/3. Beta #6: 87069 on 9/10.
    BFP #3: 4/4/11. EDD: 12/14/11. Beta #1: 39 on 4/5. Beta #2: 108 on 4/7. Beta #3: 401 on 4/11. Beta #4: 12865 on 4/22. D&C #1 5/16. D&C #2 6/3. Karyotype showed tetraploidy.

    BFP #2: 3/4/11. EDD: 11/13/11. Beta #1: 9 on 3/7. Beta #2: 0 on 3/9. Chemical Pregnancy 3/9.

    BFP #1: 10/16/10 after 10 months TTC. EDD: 6/17/11. Blighted Ovum 11/12. D&E 12/6.
  • so sorry for your losses. such a terrible thing to go through. My thoughts are with you.
    Chemical Pregnancy 2001, Married 8/8/09, TTC April 2011, BFP 5/8/11, Missed M/C @ 9wk5d, D&C 6/21/11 BFP 11/13/11 Chase Everett born at 29wks 0 days on 5/7/12 at 2 lbs 14 oz, 14 1/2 inches long.
  • I am so sorry for your losses! 

    I experienced my second loss in just a 5 month period about 2 months ago and booked an appointment with an RE because we were really feeling doomed. My DH and I met with him a couple of weeks ago and I go in for my bloodwork on the 3rd day of my period which is this coming week.  I then go in for further testing after that.

    Like you, we are able to get pregnant but just can't seem to sustain life for very long :(  After meeting with the RE I can tell you that there is still lots of hope.

    My RE told me about a patient of his that had 7 consecutive losses before she went to an RE (I can't imagine) and now she is in her 3rd trimester :) I really hope it doesn't have to get to that point but miracles happen every day! 

    Hopefully you will feel like you have a plan like I do after your meeting with your RE.   In the meantime, please know that we are always here to listen.

  • I am so sorry for your losses.  I just suffered my 3rd consecutive miscarriage 5 weeks ago and my emotions are still all over the place.  I have had my bitter moments also.  My grandmother had 12 children in another country where prenatal care was never heard of and women worked all day in the fields literally until the day they delivered.  I keep thinking about her and how she could have 12 healthy children against all the odds and I can't even have one child.  All my aunts have kids, my sister has kids, my cousins have kids.  Why me?  I think it is only natural to feel this way, especially when the loss is so recent.  Over time I hope to become more accepting and positive as I look to the future.  I am not there yet, but I hope to be.  I wish the same for you and my thoughts and prayers are with you.
  • I am so sorry for your losses. It has to be hard to see your family have so many children so 'effortlessly'. Maybe if easy labors run in the family then when you DO get your take-home baby, you will be blessed with a lightning fast delivery too! I'm totally making a stretch for something positive here, but hang in there. I hoe you get some answers soon and can move on and heal from all of this.

    hugs

    Another blogger! My Life in Transition.

    Married 05.27.07
    BFP#1 - 07.07.09 | EDD 03.14.10 | Truman Anthony born @38w 03.01.10
    BFP#2 - 03.24.11 | EDD 11.29.11 | missed MC found @9w 04.26.11 | D&C @16w 06.13.11
    BFP#3 - 09.17.11 | EDD 05.29.12 | It's a girl!!!
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  • I also just had my third loss and I am sorry to hear about your losses. I kind of have the same feeling as you. I am always here to talk just PM me. ((HUGS))
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  • So sorry for your loss. I hope you get some answers from the RE
    ME 33: PCOS & IR and a newly single mom
    ~BFP#1 3/29/11 no heartbeat 4/29/11~ BFP#2 9/25/11 CP 9/29/11~ BFP#3 10/27/11 EDD 7/10/12, Beta #1 @13DPO=198. Beta#2 @15DPO=498 1st ultrasound 11/17 = TWINS!!! Please be our take home babies.
    "In the end everything is going to be all right. If it's not all right it's not the end"

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  • I am so, so sorry for your losses. Hugs.
    TTC #1 since January 2011
    BFP#1 April 12, 2011, EDD December 24, 2011, strong heart beat at 7w3d, d&c at 10w6d
    BFP#2 Oct 24, 2011, natural miscarriage, EDD unknown
    After RPL testing my losses and subsequent infertility are considered unexplained.
    Cycle #22: Femara, TI, and progesterone = BFP!! 
    BFP#3 Dec 21, 2012. Beta #1 @14dpo = 134, progesterone 67.8. Beta #2 @ 17dpo = 664! Team green, EDD 9/1/13, healthy baby boy born 9/12/13!
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    Congratulations to the fabulous KGS2003! Her sweet boys are here! Grow boys grow!!!
  • ((HUGS))  I am so sorry for your losses.  I had 2 losses in a row and fear that the next time around will be the same thing.  My emotions, I thought, were in check till I walked by the infant clothing section in Old Navy and had to get outta there asap.  I also come from a large family where everyone gets pg just by looking at their spouse.  I feel your pain!  I wish you luck that you get some answers soon.  I go for bw the end of July to see if it's anything hormonal that's causing the losses.  Then the end of Aug, I'm having an endometrial biopsy done.  I hope we get our sticky beans soon!
    Daisypath Anniversary tickers Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers image image image Photobucket TTC since 2005 10/07 failed IUI with Gonal F and trigger 12/07 2nd failed IUI with Gonal F and trigger, right ovary hyperstimulated. 4/10/08 while saving for IVF, got our first BFP with the OVWatch! DD born 12/3/08 :) 7/10/10 BFP #2, m/c 6w blighted ovum 5/25/11 BfP #3, m/c 8w had hb at 6w, started spotting at 8w, no hb. TTC again ever since!
  • Oh my gosh, I feel your pain so much!! I have also had 3 consecutive losses in the past 12 months!! It is just awful. I think the pain does get better (my last one was in March) but the worst part is whenever I find out someone is pregnant (co-worker, friend, SIL) i feel like I have been punched in the gut. The most awful part is that I want to be happy for them. Ugg! Please let me know what happens with your testing. I just switched doctors and had RPL blood work taken. I go back at the end of July to get the results.

    Praying for all of us ladies!!

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