Parenting after 35

Feeling very sad

So today I found out that my mother's second opinion for ovarian cancer was confirmed.  She only found out last week during a routine test and I was still hoping that it was a mistake.  I feel so unhappy for my family, though my parents are in better spirits them I am.  Mom is suppose to be having surgery in Boston for a full hysterectomy either next week or the following. The dr.s are hopeful that after the surgery she will not have any complications but I am still worried.  Everything seems to be happening so fast, it's a little hard to take it all in. 

I am also scared for myself for the future as I had cervical pre-cancer last April prior to getting pregnant (all is well now) and wonder if what's happening to my mother could happen to me later.  Thoughts of "Will I be able to have another child" has entered my mind and it makes me feel guilty that I am being selfish when my mother is going through hell. 

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Re: Feeling very sad

  • *Hugs*

    I am so sorry.  Cancer is about the scariest word ever, and when it's applied to your parents or children it's a million times worse.

    I hope your mom gets through her surgery and treatment with great results!

    It's not selfish to worry about whether the cancer might be something you'll have to deal with in yourself.  I think it's a natural worry.  My husband had never had a checkup in his adult life, but after what happened with his dad he got his behind to a doctor right away, and is watching his health more closely. 

    Also keep in mind you still have postpartum hormones in your system, making things seem even bigger and scarier.  I'm not saying it isn't big and scary, but being sleep-deprived with a newborn isn't going to make the picture any sunnier, y'know?  

    Anyway, my sympathies, and I hope for the best for all of you! 

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  • Best wishes to you mom.  I hope the operation goes well and that there is nothing but smooth sailing ahead.  I agree with PP - your hormones could be making everything seem scarier.  Hugs and good luck to everyone.
  • So sorry your family is going through this. I hope the doctors can get your mom fully recovered.
  • I hope your mom recovers quickly.
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  • **HUGS** to you! I can't imagine. This was a great fear of mine too. After my Mom had me she developed Ovarian Cancer, lucky for her it was in the beginning stages and minimal therapy required.

    When I was 32 I developed it too, exept mine was stage 1 and I had surgery to remove it with very little treatment (I was lucky). My biggest fear was being able to have a baby. I was able to successfully (without issues) have a baby girl. After she was born same thing, it came back and my MD said not to treat it because I was pregnant again. It is gone and I hope never comes back. My heart goes out to you because I felt exactly how you feel. I'll have a check up next week to make sure it hasn't come back.

    Your NOT being selfish at all! 

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  • PeskyPesky member
    Left Hug  I hope things go great for your mom.  Hopefully it was caught very early and she will recover quickly.


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  • (((hugs))) So sorry that you family is going through this, I hope that you mother is ok. I think what you are feeling is very normal.
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  • (((((hugs))))) to you, that is some tough stuff to have to deal with with a newborn (or any time, actually).  I hope your mom heals quickly and well.  Hang in there.

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  • M.AmyM.Amy member

    I am so sorry for your family. My mother had ovarian cancer and was treated at Dana Faber in Boston. Please feel free to contact me if you want to chat or if your mom is interested in speaking with my mom.

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