Need to vent (long)
I feel like such a whiner, but I think I need to just get this out somewhere.
I'm getting bigger and bigger, and feeling more like a failure with Rosie. Poor thing wants to go to playgrounds and run in the backyard and play tag, and I just don't have the energy to do that, especially when it's hot. Even something simple like a quick trip to Wegmans takes a long time and either Rosie or I end up having a meltdown. Yesterday she had tantrums because I wouldn't let her pick out her own cereal, she didn't want to be buckled into her car seat, and then after the 2 minute ride home did not want to leave her car seat. So now I feel like I'm trapped in the house with her all day long.
My mom left yesterday to go visit her family in Europe and won't be back until August 7th, so I can't call her to vent like I usually do. Rosie doesn't have preschool over the summer, and there are no camps or classes that she can attend around here. I was going to sign her up for swim lessons with DH, and of course he can't do it on the night it's offered because of work.
I have a gift certificate for a prenatal massage, I think I really need to use it!
Re: Need to vent (long)
m/c 1/2/08 and 3/12/08
Eve Amelia- Born 2/24/09. 6lb 9.9oz
Natalie Ruth - Born 6/13/11 7lb 6.6oz
Um, yeah...totally hear ya and understand!!!!!!
It will get better. My #1 advice is to pick your battles, IOW - letting her pick out cereal is definitely one that I would have let go. And as tired as you are now - it will be more difficult to get out of the house after the baby...so try to do it more now. But keep it simple - like a small play area in the backyard/garage. If that is the most she does - then she will love it as the thing she gets to do outside.
Our friend just hired a mommy's helper and that's one thing that I wish I would have done last year!
I totally understand. It's on the top of my list of "reasons we're done having babies". I could only stand for about 45min at a time without super bad pain at the end of my pg, so I felt like I couldn't be the fun mom Justin deserved. The guilt drove me insane. Instead of taking him on rides at Disney- I watched other family members do it. I watched him run around at family parties and had to keep sitting down to take breaks. I felt like I was on the sidelines.
Not to be a Debbie Downer but I don't feel like it got much better when the babies were born either. The 1st few weeks Justin and I couldn't just roam stores like we used to, or stay at the playground for hours b/c the babies needed to eat or nap or were fussy. I have never admitted it but it made me resent the babies a little bit that I was losing out on all my special Justin time.So then I felt guilty about not given Justin all my time and then guilty for feeling mad at 2 newborns. Plus, my patience for him when I was up several times a night was not stellar.
Mentally- it's a path I just can't go down again.
We're getting our routine down now, the babies are happy/coo'ing/playing and since about a month ago, I feel 1,000,000% better.
I felt the exact same way, and still do sometimes. I agree with what everyone has said so far. It won't get better when the baby comes, but it does get better eventually (that's what I keep telling myself). I hardly ever take them out by myself, and when I do, its usually not a fun time, but it is getting better. I am finally able to put the baby down for a nap in his crib and have some 1 on1 time with DD, and we can go outside and play. My energy is slowly coming back, and I feel so much better than I did at the end of my pregnancy.
It's only temporary! Go get your massage & make DH take Rosie to a park and run her ragged for the day.
I felt the same way. Today was the first day that I felt able to take a really long walk with Claire and the baby. And I opted for the walk because I didn't want to chase her in the backyard or have her run to the front of the house. Yes, the stroller kept her contained.
And DH and I try to keep the baby out of public places for 6 weeks so I realize that this feeling is going to continue because I can't take Claire many places right now, at least until DH gets home from work. I did keep her in daycare two days a week to keep her used to it and to allow her to run and play without me keeping her contained. I feel guilty she's not with us but I know that she is happier playing with other kids rather than staying home watching tv, etc. with me and E.
Since our boys are a day apart, this is exactly us too and why I had to vent earlier this week. I know that it is temporary and that by fall (I hope) and next summer we will be raring to go. We try to go out for outings and have about 25% success so far, but it keeps getting easier. One thing that I did at the end of the pregnancy is I would take E for car rides. I just did not have the energy to chase him around, so it got us both out, with music and we had fun. I can physically do so much more than I could at the end of the pregnancy, but timewise, not so much. We all seem to be in similiar boats and the nice thing is that we can help each other get through it.