Am I Being Ridiculous?

bradswifey09 · June 2011

So I got a positive OPK Monday night and was all excited. DH and I bd'ed and I wanted to continue the pattern throughout the week for a better chance of TTGP. Well he decided to start a new diet this week which has left him with no energy, so guess what? NO BD last night or this morning! I am highly irritated! I am worried that we are missing our window. Am I being absolutely ridiculous for being irritated at DH?

kz's_girlygirl · June 2011

I would probably be a bit irritated as well- Does YH know you got a +OPK and it's near ovulation time?

If you still have secondary signs that point to your fertile window (EWCM) there's still time, so GL for later!!

lawyerin · June 2011

Not ridiculous at all. I'd tell your DH to take one for the team tonight

bradswifey09 · June 2011

kz's_girlygirl:
I would probably be a bit irritated as well- Does YH know you got a +OPK and it's near ovulation time?
If you still have secondary signs that point to your fertile window (EWCM) there's still time, so GL for later!!

He knows. I had the EWCM on Monday when I first got the positive

kiki1213 · June 2011

I don't think you're being ridiculous at all. I feel your pain actually. My husband wakes up around 4 for work and is too exhausted by the time our daughter goes to bed.. Which I get that he wakes up at 4 and works and is tired, but when he wants another baby too... doesn't he know where they come from?? :-) I usually have to wake up at 4 to BD before he goes to work. I really hope I get pregnant soon so I can get some sleep! Is it possible to find his most energetic time of the day and work around that? That has been what works for me... even if it's 4am.

LilyPotter218 · June 2011

I'd be upset.

I get it can start to feel like a chore and of course no one wants sex to be like that, but at the same time he really should understand how limited the window is...

I would first make sure sex is still fun, we have def had to put some extra effort into it to make sure its not just to make a baby. I'd also talk to him and make sure he gets how much you are doing (temping, testing, checking CM...) to make sure you KNOW the right time.

GL

TrendyTina · June 2011

I totally understand. DH gave me the same excuse about being tired a few times this cycle which really irritated me. After I knew I had already O'd, I sat him down and explained ONE MORE TIME how conception works and how it is difficult to know exactly when you are fertile until it's too late. He promised he would "be a better husband" next cycle if we get a BFN and we would BD ED no matter what.

If I do get a BFN, my plan is to sit him down and force him to watch the charting videos from FF. It will only take 20 minutes and will educate him about how the process works. I think once he understand how difficult it really is to get the perfect timing, he will be more apt to BD without complaining.

GL!

katiebug58 · June 2011

I had a tired husband this past cycle and I was highly irritated too! We had a chat about it about a week after and he reminded me of all the times in the past that I was tired. I explained that there is a short window that we need to make work and then he can be tired any other time! He seemed to understand and agree so we'll see how next month goes...

Talk to DH, but maybe wait until you are not upset? Good luck!

waltzingmatilda13 · June 2011

I'd be upset, too. I like the idea of educating him more on the signs and how important it is to read them and BD when every looks good.

I also agree that sex can become more like a chore when you're trying to time everything just right, but I think he needs to take one for the team while you're in your FW, sex can always be more fun next time around.

fyziksgirl · June 2011

Same thing happened to me this cycle, and I'm pissed, too. Better now, but still, just resentful that I did so! much! work! ALL! MONTH! and it might be all down the drain because he was "too tired" two key nights.

After the fact I sat down with him and lovingly but firmly talked about how limited the window is and how important it is we BD EOD at least for a couple weeks. I said I get that he's tired, but if we want to get pregnant...we just have to. I'm not always "wanting" it, either, but that's how it works.

It kinda worked but kinda backfired. Now he understands and says he'll make more of an effort next time, but knowing we might have blown our chance this month makes him feels super guilty and he is having an even harder time "performing."

*sigh*

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