1st Trimester

when did you tell people?

I got a positive result on a clear blue digital test, and I have an upcoming dr's appt. I am in the middle of week 5 if you go by gestational age.

When did you all tell people and what was your reasoning?  Thanks!

Re: when did you tell people?

  • Well, we did IVF.  I have purposely been very open with our IF journey and so I told as soon as I knew at 3w3d :-)
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  • I don't judge anyone who tells early, and I strongly feel it is a very personal decision, but DH and I choose not tell until after the first tri ultrasound because with our first we got a healthy heartbeat and sonogram report at 8 weeks, but at the firs tri ultrasound they discovered a major deformity in our baby that resulted in a loss.  It was beyond terrible.  Having to explain to everyone what had happened was pure torture, and I have talked to more people that have had a loss even after the first ultrasound since it happened to me.  We have had friends who have spilled the beans super early who are fine, and we have had friends who have lost their babies.  Most everyone I talk to says they wish they had not told "the masses."  People always say they would want the support anyways (I said it, too) but it is SO hard to deal with and to explain and to relive every time someone asks how the baby is doing.
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  • We've told our family only (i.e. parents and siblings). We're going to wait until we're past the first trimester until we tell the masses. It's purely a personal decision though. Just take some time to weight out the pros and cons.

     

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  • With my son - I waited until 14 - 15 weeks - after we received the results of our NT scan to share our news with friends.  Our immediate family knew at 6 - 8 weeks or so.

    I am old fashioned and felt the less people to be asking me questions the better I would be in the first tri.

    With this PG, I think I will be showing before then so might now have the same timeline.

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  • We told my Mom the night of our bfp, his family over fathers day weekend and slowly have been telling several of our close friends.  Like a lot of pp have said, it's your comfort level.  We decided we wanted the support if something was to go wrong and if everything goes well than we've been able to share our excitement longer!  We won't tell fb and coworkers until we hit 12wks probably.... If we can wait that long lol!  Seems like forever!
  • With my first we told immediate family between 12 and 16 weeks and we asked them not to say anything to anyone. I told work about 20 weeks.    I told my running group when I started to slow down, but other than that I never made an announcement or anything no facebook post or showers.  I just let people figure it out on their own.  I actually wore a zip up hoodie sweatshirt most of the time and had to take it off at a function around 27-28 weeks and the girls in my group were ASTOUNDED by my stomach.  You could have nailed some of their heads to the floor. 

    I just don't like the questions or the attention so I avoid it at all costs.  

     

     

  • sgb721sgb721 member

    We told people at 13 weeks (Valentines Day) but we lost the baby 2 weeks later at 15 weeks. Everyone was very supportive.

    I suggest waiting until at least 12 weeks- second trimester your miscarriage rate drops immensely- or until after an NT scan if you choose to have one.

    GOOD LUCK!!

    TTC since June 2010
    5 Angels

    Lilypie - (hlC0)
  • I told my mom and sister immediately when I found out in my 4th week!!! We were planning on waiting until our second trimester to tell anyone other than parents, but my mom and sister had other plans... :-/ So we ended up telling people just so we would be able to share our news before they all found out from other people! We really made it public after we saw the heartbeat at our first ultrasound at 6 w 1 day :)
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  • We told everyone at my DD's 1st birthday party on Saturday. My husband and I found out on June 17th. 

    We don't believe in bad luck or in jinxing something.... if I were to lose this pregnancy, it would have nothing to do with when we told people.

    Not sure how far along I am because my cycles were wacky due to breastfeeding. However, I should be at least 7 weeks by now, so I was at least 6 1/2 weeks at the party.

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  • We live far away from family and are visiting next week. We plan to tell them then b/c we want to tell them in person. I had a m/c in Feb. and a lot of people knew I was pregnant then, so it was upsetting and uncomfortable to tell them I was no longer pregnant. After we tell our families this time, we want to keep it hush until we're about in 2nd tri
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  • This time everyone in our families know and close friends knew pretty much right away.  With our 1st we waited till 12 weeks.  I wish I could have waited, it makes me nervous that everyone knows and I have not heard a heartbeat or had an ultrasound just yet.
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    BFP#2: 5/8/11, EDD 1/24/12 missed mc 
    BFP#1: 1/24/10, EDD 9/24/10, DD Born 9/25/10
  • We told our families the weekend after we got our BFP.  We also told a couple friends, and coworkers, and of course, one of our friends who has a big mouth found out and started telling everyone, so we then felt like we needed to announce it to our friends before they heard from someone else... we were about 7 weeks at that point... I still haven't announced anything on FB or anything, and don't plan to until I have at least heard baby's heartbeat, but most all of our friends know now.
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