Seperation Anxiety

weezie825 · June 2011

Suddenly DD went from being the happiest baby in the world to being very clingy and crying all the time.

When I walk into daycare to pick her up she reaches for me. If I don't immediately go pick her up and carry her around while I am packing her stuff up she has a total meltdown with full blown sobs and crocodile tears. It sometimes takes me as much as 5-10 minutes to calm her down.

Last night bedtime took almost 2 hours and LO didn't fall asleep until 10 pm and that was with me laying on our bed with her.

This morning DH took LO from me to put her into the car to go to school and she lost it. She was screaming and crying all the way down the walk.

I know this is a phase... I chant, "and this too shall pass," under my breathe... But right now it is VERY hard.

Any words of wisdom?

mrs. remy · June 2011

Sean did this too......with no rhyme or reason. It really was just a stage he went through. The best thing you can do is just be firm and say "Mommy has to go" and kiss her goodbye. Prolonging the hugs and kisses always led to more hysterics....

He still does this from time to time at drop off, if his favorite teacher isn't there. He puts his arms up and is like "Mama! Up!" Its best if I just say "I love you but mommy has to go", give him a kiss and get out of there without making a big deal about it. They say he stops pretty much as soon as I am out of the building.

weezie825 · June 2011

I think I could deal with everything else pretty well if it weren't for the bedtime issues hadn't gotten so out of hand. What used to be 15 minutes of rocking is now a 2 hour ordeal.

We were planning on trying Ferber this weekend, but in the book he actually says NOT to do it when the LO has seperation anxiety issues becuase it could actually make things worse.

So, now I don't have any idea what to do.

KathrynMD · June 2011

ditto carrie - be firm. Mama's gotta go; love you.

I see this at daycare all the time - the hysterics end approx. 30-60 seconds after Mom goes. Today, DD's little friend almost threw up she was so upset about something and her mom kept talking to her, hugs, telling her to calm down, etc. Nada - mom left and I stayed. She was fine.

The separation anxiety. ... IDK, I know its real, but I also think the kids kinda overdo it. I would see if it gets better in a few days, but a 2 hour bedtime production probably isn't any worse than doing Ferber.

Cooper81 · June 2011

I don't really have much advice, J has always put himself to sleep, but lately he will stay up and talk to himself for like an hour and after 20 minutes he starts crying for us. I will go in, lay him back down, rub his back for a few mintues and say "mama loves you, it's time to go to sleep, night-night" and he will calm down and talk for a bit and fall asleep. GL, even though you know "this too shall pass" it doesn't make the here and now any easier to deal with.

ThePastor'sWife · June 2011

Yep, I agree w/ the others - I know it's hard (trust me, I KNOW when they're crying and reaching for you how hard it is), but I'm a big believer in just getting out of there w/o making a big production of it. Even w/ my kindergartners, that's the best option and ends the hysterics the quickest. I don't have any input on the bedtime, b/c like PP, DS puts himself to sleep, but hopefully you can figure out something that works and will shorten that routine time, b/c nobody deserves to get stuck spending 2 hours trying to get LO down.

Hang in there and hopefully it passes quickly!

anonsouthernbell · June 2011

My experience is a little different as I don't take my son to DC but I have dropped him off to the church nursery before. When he would freak out about me leaving, I found that if I came in and played w/him for a few minutes then he was okay w/me leaving. He was younger than your daughter though, about 9 months or so.

Want a personalized experience?

Seperation Anxiety

Re: Seperation Anxiety

Choose Another Board

Search Boards