Mia is 18 months. At this age, would you put her in a closed room for a timeout, or maybe a closed off area, or would you just do the "face-away, no attention" thing?
She is currently pushing some boundaries, but I am being "too soft with her" (according to DH) because I'm not comfortable with putting her in her room by herself even if it's only 2 minutes because she basically goes ape-*** and I don't like not seeing her in case she hits her head or something.
Re: Help me with time-outs
I was having problems too. We started off with a plastic stool in the dining area (he can't see anyone in there) and he kept getting up, it was a total game for him. So I took the advice, of I think Lauren, and now strap him in his travel booster seat (not carseat). It seems to be working because he does not like it and usually the behavior is gone. I'm also doing the 1-2-3 counting.
I wouldn't put Max in his room alone. Too scared he could hurt himself.
I would not put her in a room by herself. I just put Tess in a random spot by the wall and go about my business til she can get up. She responds well to time-out though. Emma wouldn't have given a ratsass if I would have sent her down to the dark basement for time-out.
I have learned though that it's similar to the CIO method for sleep training. It takes them a few times to figure out what they are supposed to do in time out. At first Tess would get up and I'd have to sit her back down and I would start my timer all over again everytime she got up. But I never kept at it for more than 10 or 15 minutes. Eventually she figured out she had to sit in the same place until Time Out was over.
I do what K&P does. I wouldn't put Audrey & Ethan in their rooms by themselves. For me, it just doesn't feel right.
If they have to sit in one spot without getting up, it forces them to at least see that they can't go about doing what they want at the moment and maybe, just maybe they'll think about why they're there. We talk about it when it's over and reset the time if they get up.
I would designate an area in the house, like a stool or lower step and make her sit there, face away, no attention for 1-minute (a minute for each year old). It takes a week or two for them to grasp the concept so don't give up.
I wouldn't put her in her room by herself.
Abigail Taylor 09.18.2008
Agree with PP about not putting dd in her room alone. Besides, you don't want to draw an association with alone-time in their room & punishment. When she's older you may want to encourage her to play by herself in her room, and IMO, it might be harder if that's where she's always been sent for bad behavior.
With Rowan, I stick a chair in the hallway facing the corner (so there is nothing to look at), and make her sit there for about 2 minutes. She's screams like a banshee the whole time, but she doesn't get up.
Mia's in day-care right? If so, I would ask her teachers what they do when she pushes boundaries at school.
This is going to sound horrible, but we had what my Dad called "the bad chair." If we needed to think about what we'd done, etc., we got to sit in a chair away from everyone and everything (but he could still keep an eye on us). It was torture if your sibling was scurrying around doing their best to make sure you saw all the fun things they got to do while you were being punished.
I wouldn't put her in her room by herself. Plus, her room is supposed to be a happy place - you definitely don't want to create that kind of negative association. And at her age, I think the common thought is 1 minute of TO for every year they are old.
ETA: The handful of times that I've sent Geneva to timeout, she's been happy to sit there because she's so stubborn. I did send her to her room once (halfway as a joke) and she gladly walked in there and plopped down in the middle of the floor with her arms crossed.
Thank you everyone! I will talk to her teachers and will give the chair a try, though it might also take her a week or so to get it (she doesn't sit still at all - LOL).
Thanks again!
Tell me about it
The worst is when she is told not to do it, and she looks right at me and does it again and again! Stinker.
This was Jackson's favorite thing for a while. He is so stubborn. He would even walk backwards and do what I had just asked him not to and then giggle when I got onto him.
Argh - Mia does something similar when I get her! She smiles real big, says "Hi" and hugs me. Emotional blackmail.