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I need your help! Re: CIO

hurricanepayne89hurricanepayne89
in Babies: 3 - 6 Months
I need as many anti-CIO links as possible. This is for proof that CIO is bad. It sucks when I have to prove to my MIL and GMIL that CIO is not for us, otherwise I'm a shitty Mom -- one who "hovers," "spoils," and doesn't know anything about child-rearing because they have raised one or 3 kids (GMIL: 3, MIL:1) and I have not. Please help. TIA.
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Re: I need your help! Re: CIO

  • sarabostonsaraboston

    Your LO is MUCH too young to CIO or Ferberize. Every one of the books says absolutely not before 4 months, they don't have the ability to self soothe and it's just cruel. It works better after 5 months. Have them read Healthy Sleep Habits Happy Child or Solve Your Child's Sleep Problems. (Both available at your local library and very insightful books.)

     

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  • sarahjulypsusarahjulypsu member
    I'm having a similar problem with my FIL and GMIL. Luckily my MIL and her sister are very supportive of me raising my child how I want. She is three months in a week. But when she was one WEEK old they started!!!! Apperently at one week she wasn't really hungry and should have to wait untill im ready to deal with her and she can just cry.
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  • QueseraQuesera member
    Why do you have to provide proof that YOUR decisions are what's right for YOUR baby? That's ridiculous, don't even engage them. 
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  • JerkStore213JerkStore213 member

    imageQuesera:
    Why do you have to provide proof that YOUR decisions are what's right for YOUR baby? That's ridiculous, don't even engage them. 

    This! Tell them to STFU. It's your baby, not theirs.

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  • Megs12411Megs12411 member

    imageQuesera:
    Why do you have to provide proof that YOUR decisions are what's right for YOUR baby? That's ridiculous, don't even engage them. 

    Exactly.

    You are the parent. You don't have to justify your parenting to anyone. Don't get defensive.

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  • kcisthebombdotcomkcisthebombdotcom member

    https://www.associatedcontent.com/article/19237/a_factbased_case_against_letting_your.html

     https://www.phdinparenting.com/2008/07/05/no-cry-it-out/

    https://www.askdrsears.com/topics/fussy-baby/science-says-excessive-crying-could-be-harmful

     

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  • RyAnsMoMMy123RyAnsMoMMy123 member
    imageMegs12411:

    imageQuesera:
    Why do you have to provide proof that YOUR decisions are what's right for YOUR baby? That's ridiculous, don't even engage them. 

    Exactly.

    You are the parent. You don't have to justify your parenting to anyone. Don't get defensive.

    All of this! Tell them you are the mother, you will make the decisions. End of story.
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  • GreenFlamingo7GreenFlamingo7 member

    It's YOUR baby. As long as you are not doing something to endanger the child, it isn't anyone's business how you choose to parent.

    "I understand that you have a different view about parenting than I do, but I no longer wish to discuss this topic. I have made my decision and do not want your opinion on the matter."

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  • TiffanyTheMomTiffanyTheMom member

    ITA with the above comments! DH's grandmother sat over my bbay just a month ago (while I was in the shower and she thought I wasn't able to hear) chanting, "Spoiled, spoiled, spoiled! You're just so spoiled, your momma picks you up when you cry and she puts you to sleep. Spoiled, spoiled, spoiled..." I was furious but approached her calmly and let her know babies only cry when they need something. Being held IS a need to a baby. This is MY baby, not yours, and I will do what I please with her. GMIL just shrugged and backed off, but I think she just didn't want to be combative with me.

    Don't even show them those links. Trust me, old people have it in their heads that if it was okay when they were having babies, it's okay now. Showing them what 'professionals' say won't change their tune. Every time they say something, tell them you're doing what your pediatrician advised and leave it at that. 

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