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Working Moms
ai&Jas
member
Moms who had a c section and their DH had to look after the other kids
ai&Jas
member
in Working Moms
Hi Ladies,
I'm not due until October, but I'm just thinking of the logistics for when baby #2 arrives.
Basically, I'm having a scheduled C section, we dont have family near by so DH will visit during the day, but at night he'll go home and look after our DD (she's 3.5 now).
I'd like to hear from moms who did not have a family member/SO/DH etc stay over night with them.
1) Did you have the nurse leave your baby in the room with you, or did they take baby to the nursery and care of it ie change diapers etc. If you nursed, did you just have them bring the baby to you when it needed feeding?
I know with DD, my milk didnt come in until the day after i left the hospital so i did nurse, but also also gave DD some formula because she was frankly hungry and I was ok with this!
Can you walk me through how you managed on your own during the night?
Thanks!
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Re: Moms who had a c section and their DH had to look after the other kids
Thanks jbg! Our plan is to have DH drop DD off at daycare and come with me when i actually have the c section. He'll stay the whole day, then bring DD to visit that night. After that he'll go home with her. He'll come back and do the same for the remaining 2 days. It's just the nights that I won't have anyone with me.
Both my IL's are no longer with us and my family lives in Australia. His 1 sister lives about 1.5 hrs away and has small kids. Same thing with our friends that do live close by-- they all have small kids and unfortunately 5 of them either just had #2 or #3 or are expecting baby #2 a month or two before me. Its been a really busy year with babies in my circle! So we are really limited with who we can ask to help us out! The one sister-in-law that does live closer is definitely a no go. She smokes like a chimney and parties to all hrs and she doesn't even baby sit her own grand daughter.
We'll have MIL in town for DC2's birth but if DH can't stay, I would plan on sending baby to the nursery at least at night, they'll bring the baby back to nurse as needed.
For me, after my c/s I still had the epi and spinal for 24 hours, so I couldn't get up. If DH wasn't there I wouldn't have been able to get up to put DD in the bassinet. I know that some obs do that differently, so you may be up and moving that first night.
I would nurse as much as possible but I too had the nurses give DD formula because she was losing too much weight, my milk didn't come in until after I went home either. I had the nurse give DD formula late in the night and then I could sleep a longer stretch.
We sent DS to stay with my parents when I delivered DD, but DH had the flu that and ended going home to rest, so I was alone. I sent DD to the nursery, and the nurses brought her to me to BF. She was pretty sleepy anyway, and my milk hadn't come in, so it was mostly cuddling. By the next morning, I was moving around enough to get her out of the bassinet to BF, but I think I still sent her to the nursery for part of the second night.
Good luck! Recovering from my scheduled c/s was much easier than my first.
Macy ~ 10.23.09
I had a scheduled c/s w/ DD (breech) and DH slept at home.
She slept in the nursery, but they brought her to me to nurse (which didn't work since my milk didn't come in for ~2 days). I was walking around the morning after the c/s - I think the first night the nurses just handed her to me in bed. I could get up enough to put her back in the basinett.
The hospital I stayed at was weird-they had a policy that you couldnt have baby in the room with you while you were asleep. So LO slept in the nursery and when she woke up to eat (or it had been 3 hours since she last ate), they'd bring her to me to nurse. They did the diaper changes. If I wanted formula to be given at night I had to sign paperwork for it. It was really easy.
I've only had one baby but DH didn't stay with me at night. I was in the hospital for 4 nights and coudn't get out of bed for the first night. I put LO in the nursery every night - it was just way easier and I figured I had plenty of time to be awake with him at night in the coming weeks. The nurses broght him to meet just to eat and then they would take him back to the nursery. The first night LO was in special care nursery and I was pretty out of it so the feeding that was in the middle of the night they gave him formula. I thought it all worked out great and honestly this made DH way more helpful during the day b/c he wasn't tired. That's why we did it that way. The only weird thing was that one night LO was still fussy when I asked for them to take him back and the nurse pretty much refused to take him back - she kept saying, well don't you think he should eat some more? But since my milk hadn't come in I didn't figure there was much I could do to fix that. So I ended up sleeping with him in my bed for a few hours which is probably a big no-no. Other than that the nurses were really great about realizing that I was by myself and needed some help.
DH stayed with me each night (4 nights) but went home in the morning for a couple hours to take care of the dogs, shower, etc.... We had the twins in the nursery at night - all night - so we could sleep and i could heal well... it was the best thing we did - having 1/2 decent sleep those nights was soooo smart.
i'd have the twins on my own in the morning for a couple hours and did fine- even healing from the c/s - it was OK... if i needed help i'd call a nurse.
I had a scheduled c-section with the twins. DH was there during the c-section, and left in time to pick up DD from day care. While I was in the hospital, he'd work for a 1/2 day and come up for a 1/2 day. He was with DD every night. It worked out great.
The twins were sent to the nursery at night. The nurses brought them in every 2-3 hours, depending on when they woke up hungry. They knew I was BFing and were happy to accommodate.
Managing on my own during the night involved the nurses. They always helped me get set up to feed (I was learning how to tandem feed, so they'd help me get everyone latched on) and then would help me swaddle the babies back up and take them out.
It worked out great!
We dropped off older DS at preschool on the way to the hospital for the scheduled c-section. DH was able to go pick him up at the end of the school day and bring him to meet his new brother. Then they both went home and I was alone.
The nurses insisted that I call them to do all diaper changes, which was really nice. They would put the bassinet next to my bed, and I was able to reach in and get the baby from bed to nurse and then I could put him back in and we'd try to sleep. I kept the baby with me at all times, and it was really rather easy to handle. I was up and walking within 24 hours and released from the hospital about 50 hours after surgery. I heal really quickly from c-sections, though, and didn't have any complications. I also wasn't on any pain medication after the first 24 hours.
I had a scheduled c/s with #2. I wanted DS#1's schedule to stay as much in tact as possible, so he went to preschool as usual, while DH was with me at the hospital for the section. Then DH brought me dinner and brought DS to see us at the hospital and I stayed the night alone. I had the baby stay in the nursery for most of the night and the nurses brought her every 2-3 hrs to breastfeed. With DS#1, I had him "room in" with me all night, but with DD#2, I knew that I had to get some rest so I could begin to recover to chase TWO kids, so I felt ok with having her stay in the nursery for most of the night (besides feeding times.. she also got a little formula because with both kids my milk was slow to come in).
For the few days I was in the hospital, DH brought DS#1 to school, then came to visit me and the baby, in the evenings he would visit us with DS#1. It was really fine. If I were you, I would try to secure a back upbabysitting for the day your baby is born though... if your section gets bumped or the docs are running late, you could run later than expected and may need someone to pick up your older child.
GL!
I only have one child, but the hospital I delivered at doesn't have a nursery so that wasn't even an option. My section was unplanned and happened at 10:30pm, by the time we got back from recovery it was almost 2 am. By 9am I was up walking around and getting freshened up. So, for the exception of the 2am-9am I was completely able to pick up/put down/nurse/diaper change.
If your section is in the AM, I really don't see any reason why you would have an issue caring for baby on your own by the night time. If for some reason you do, I am sure the nurses would hand you the baby, if you can't get out of bed.