Postpartum Depression

Pre-baby depression

I didn't know where else to go. But i'm currently pregnant yet so depressed. I wanted this to be the greatest experience but I can't even stand to look in the mirror. I've gained so much weight (i was a tiny girl) and feel I have no bump at 20 weeks which is what everyone else has, I don't glow & my skin is nasty and broken out, I'm dreading my baby shower and I just canceled my maternity pictures b/c whats the point of remembering one of the worst times in my life? I don't know what to do and I don't think I can go through the next 4 months without some guidance or help. It makes me too nervous to take anti-depressants now. Did anyone else feel like this before the baby?

Re: Pre-baby depression

  • I am so sorry that you feel this way. I felt this way when I was pregnant with my first one. I wasnt on any medication for that one. I am on medication with this pregnancy and its so different. I am so much happier. I see two doctors that manage my medication and its perfectly safe. I promise! I have had numerous ultrasounds. I think you should talk to your doctor honestly. I hope you feel better and just remember that this too shall pass!
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  • Would you mind telling me what medication it is? I will call my OB the second I have a chance. I have to start enjoying this at some point. I feel like I'm going to be a terrible mom!
  • beezjabeezja member

    I'm in the same boat. I had a history of depression before the I was pregnant and when I found out I was pregnant the doctor pulled me off all my meds. I am miserable  and because of that I am making my husband miserable too, but I can't help myself.

     Part of the reason I'm so stressed is because my job calls for me to work 15-20 hours a day several times a week with regular work day hours the rest of the time. I never get a break. I was looking at my calendar and realized I have to work  days like that every other day for at least the next three weeks and I just can't handle it. Sent me into a tailspin which has had me crying for days. As primary breadwinner in my family I have no choice but to do it. The job also comes with a lot of public criticism and personal attacks.

    I feel awful, I'm miserable and by me being so down I make my husband pretty miserable too.

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  • i felt the same way when i was pregnant. it was really hard for me to be excited bc there were so many things not going right in my life. i felt & still feel very guilty about the way i felt when i was pregnant when i look at my daughter now. i took lexapro when i was pregnant & it helped some but i felt like it wasnt making a big enough difference for me to continue, maybe it would be different for you? you might just have to try it & see if it works for you. but i am telling you it gets better after the baby gets here! i lost 30 pounds in the first week after giving birth. my face isnt breaking out so badly (it does take time for hormones to get back to "normal") - i thought it was one of the worst times in my life but i wish i could go back to enjoy being pregnant, not the people in my life or the events that occurred but to be excited - i hope things have gotten better for you
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