new to board- no registry?

morsey2011 · June 2011

This is my first time on this board, so I apologize in advance if this is one of those questions that gets asked all the time. I'm having at least one shower given by my church and my mom has told me there will be another one given by family and friends. My question: is it necessary to have a gift registry? Do people expect one? I tried starting one last night online for Target, but I just don't know. I feel silly saying buy this bottle cleaning brush or this certain thermometer. Anyone else not doing a registry? This is my first baby so I'm starting out with basically nothing, so I feel like anything would be awesome.

MsCrispy · June 2011

You don't have to do one, but they are usually nice so you get some of the stuff you need.

Do your friends and family usually register? It's pretty standard for my circle, but if it is not common in yours, then I think you can easily skip it.

heathlyn9 · June 2011

I agree that it's not exactly necessary (and if your family is like mine they won't shop off of it anyways), but it is a nice resource to have for yourself if nothing else so that you know that YOU have everything that you need for baby. If you don't register you are likely to end up with a bunch of clothes, stuffed animals & blankets. If you're perfectly okay with that then I'd say you're all good.

MustanGTbaby13 · June 2011

I would probably recommend registering. Worst case scenario, no one purchases anything on it.

Maybe do some research on what products are deemed to be the best. Pack n Plays, bassinets, swings, pumps, bottles, etc. You aren't saying you must buy these things...but a registry is at least an idea to get someone going in the right direction.

Maybe put one or two big things on there, some people may want to do a group gift.

Liz4444 · June 2011

I don't think registries are necessary, I'm not registering. Just a few years ago, they didn't even have baby registries and no one had problems getting gifts. If you don't have one and someone wants to get you a bigger item, they will generally ask what you want, that's what my aunt and uncle did, they are getting us our stroller.

Ms.Jade · June 2011

I don't think they are necessary. Especially if you are going to get so specific about small things like pacifiers and bottle brushes. I would leave things like that off that really don't matter. If you have specific taste or preferences (for example we have an eco-friendly home and want to lean in that direction for gifts) then it's nice to let guests know which bathtub or diaper bag you prefer. If you really don't care what you get, and don't mind having to return duplicates or things that are just not your style, you can get away with no registry. Good luck!

ellewoodsSC · June 2011

Even if no one shops from your registry, it can be convenient tool for you to help get the necessities for your LO, as starting a registry usually gets you on the mailing list for coupons and sales, as well as giving you a completion discount near your due date. Its a nice reminder of the things you need to buy, so don't worry about putting small, dinky things on it. Don't bother registering for clothes, they are a staple of baby shower gifts. It does however take some time to pick out the bigger, more expensive items, so this might help:

https://www.lucieslist.com/

Also keep in mind that product selection at Target can vary from store to store and that a lot of things that are available online aren't in the stores (should say that in the item description)

rhubarb123 · June 2011

It is a good idea to have a registry for those people who like them - like me. I always buy off the registry and then purchase something else I like and think would be useful or "cute". If I get an invite for a shower with no registry the first thought in my mind is that person only wants gift cards to a baby store, or checks, or cash. That might not be the case but it is my first thought. I usually spend less then I normally would because it makes it look like they obviously have everything they need that they didn't even have to register. Just my opinion.

BTW...Liz...there have been bridal and baby registries for YEARS! lol

morsey2011 · June 2011

Thanks everyone. I may go ahead and do one in case there are some people who like shopping from them. I had already started one and put a few big items on it, in case hostesses wanted to do a big gift (which is what was done at my wedding shower). I may add a few more smaller items, but my goodness there is so much stuff to think about! Thanks again.

Liz4444 · June 2011

Rhubarb, I think people understood my point without me googling and writing out the exact date that registries began.

I find it funny that you would side-eye someone who doesn't have a registry, but someone registering for nipple cream, breast pads and nursing bras you wouldn't blink an eye. And why would you spend less because someone bought their own necessities? Isn't that their job as a parent? The phrase "it takes a village to raise a child" doesn't mean you need everyone to pay for the needs of your child it means everyone in that child's life should love and guide the child to the best of their ability. Are you going to love the child less because it's parents bought all of the diapers and bottles for the baby themselves? I want my friends and family to love and spoil my child with fun stuff, DH and I will take care of the our child's basic needs.

ellewoodsSC · June 2011

Liz4444:
Rhubarb, I think people understood my point without me googling and writing out the exact date that registries began.

I find it funny that you would side-eye someone who doesn't have a registry, but someone registering for nipple cream, breast pads and nursing bras you wouldn't blink an eye. And why would you spend less because someone bought their own necessities? Isn't that their job as a parent? The phrase "it takes a village to raise a child" doesn't mean you need everyone to pay for the needs of your child it means everyone in that child's life should love and guide the child to the best of their ability. Are you going to love the child less because it's parents bought all of the diapers and bottles for the baby themselves? I want my friends and family to love and spoil my child with fun stuff, DH and I will take care of the our child's basic needs.

I think you've taken this comment to the extreme and ran off in some weird direction.

Obviously how much you're willing to spend will depend on your relationship to the shower recipient. I can agree with Rhubarb that without a registry, I'd be inclined to spend less, not out of spite but just because I'd be content to buy a cute $10 toy, an outfit and a blanket and leave it at that, spending about $30. However, with a registry if I see that somebody wants a boppy pillow or diaper champ or whatever, I'd be willing to spend more to give them the items that they need.

Liz4444 · June 2011

So you spend $30 instead of $40, it really doesn't matter that much. I tend to decide how much I want to spend before I start shopping and find something at that amount, with or without a registry.

abell77 · June 2011

There is nothing wrong with not having one, but some people really like shopping off of them (other's don't). So it's up to you.

Liz4444 · June 2011

and Ella, you are totally right, a very random, bad mood tangent... but I just had a massage and feel better now.

rhubarb123 · June 2011

lol...I find it interesting that my opinions even got commented on. They are my opinions so it doesn't really matter one way or the other. I think the reason I would most likely spend less is because if they don't have a registry I would feel that they really don't "need" much...kwim? I have gone to showers for women who were not well off financially and I probably go over-board according to some people...but I know they totally need the items.

ILoveRedVino · June 2011

Liz4444:

I find it funny that you would side-eye someone who doesn't have a registry, but someone registering for nipple cream, breast pads and nursing bras you wouldn't blink an eye. And why would you spend less because someone bought their own necessities? Isn't that their job as a parent? The phrase "it takes a village to raise a child" doesn't mean you need everyone to pay for the needs of your child it means everyone in that child's life should love and guide the child to the best of their ability.

I completely agree.

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