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Can someone come give me a massage?

leslie13510leslie13510
in Babies on the Brain

And maybe let my dogs out to pee so I don't have to get off the couch?  TIA

I feel like a very sore noodle after working out tonight, but maybe by the time DH gets home I'll be in good enough shape to be able to make some lovin' without my muscles spontaneously combusting.  ;) 

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Re: Can someone come give me a massage?

  • ExcitedtostartExcitedtostart member
    imageleslie13510:

    be able to make some lovin' without my muscles spontaneously combusting.  ;) 

    Now that would be hot sex!

    I'll come over. I'm ok at massages, but I can take the dogs to play with Riley & Stella, and the Duo out to dinner.  

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  • leslie13510leslie13510
    Awesome ETS.  And you can take the dogs wherever you want, but if you value your sanity (and mine) you will leave the duo passed out in bed.  LOL
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  • ExcitedtostartExcitedtostart member

    LOL. No worries!!

    Rule #1: Never wake a sleeping baby!

    Rule #2: Never wake a sleeping toddler!

    Rule #3: WHY DO YOU NEED 3??? 1 & 2 and that's it! 

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  • leslie13510leslie13510
    See, you've already got this parenting thing down, or at least the basics of it.  ;)
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  • ExcitedtostartExcitedtostart member
    Lol. I think I will still need help when the time comes. Wink
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  • leslie13510leslie13510

    Ok, here are some tips:

    1. While you're burping a baby during a feeding, if you hear a hiccup noise instead of an actual burp, get the puke rag ready.  This is especially true for a reflux baby.

    2. For the first 4-6 months, let them sleep wherever the hell they'll actually stay asleep.  If that means they nap in the swing every day, so be it. 

    3. The phrase, "Thank you, I'll take into consideration," is the best way to brush off unwanted advice.  Whatever you do, don't argue with them because they'll defend their parenting method to the death. 

    4. Skip the Matchbox cars and tiny Legos, and force them to play with massively huge version of these until they're old enough to vacuum after every play session.  Trust me on this, your feet will thank you.

    5. Invest in a good, quick coffee machine now.  You'll need it.  Also wine.  Just start stocking up now.

    And now that I've done my good deed for the day, I'm going to go make some devilled eggs before I demolish an entire box of cookies. 

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  • ExcitedtostartExcitedtostart member
    imageleslie13510:

    Ok, here are some tips:

    1. While you're burping a baby during a feeding, if you hear a hiccup noise instead of an actual burp, get the puke rag ready.  This is especially true for a reflux baby.

    Ahh, this I know. I can usually have a towel or trash can ready before the parents expect the soon-to-follow torrent of stomach contents.   

    imageleslie13510:
    2. For the first 4-6 months, let them sleep wherever the hell they'll actually stay asleep.  If that means they nap in the swing every day, so be it. 
    Good to know. 

    imageleslie13510:
    3. The phrase, "Thank you, I'll take into consideration," is the best way to brush off unwanted advice.  Whatever you do, don't argue with them because they'll defend their parenting method to the death. 

    So, can I use this with house buying "advice"? Car Maintenance advice? Career, how to be a wife, how to train my dog advice? Love it! 

    imageleslie13510:
    4. Skip the Matchbox cars and tiny Legos, and force them to play with massively huge version of these until they're old enough to vacuum after every play session.  Trust me on this, your feet will thank you.

    Will do! 

    imageleslie13510:
    5. Invest in a good, quick coffee machine now.  You'll need it.  Also wine.  Just start stocking up now.

    Coffee is my lifeblood.

    And by stock up on wine, you mean... drink it fast? I don't understand this. Wine gets bought, gets drunk, gets recycled... where is the stocking up?

    imageleslie13510:
    And now that I've done my good deed for the day, I'm going to go make some devilled eggs before I demolish an entire box of cookies. 

    How do you make them? I've only had them once or twice. Enjoy! 

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  • leslie13510leslie13510

    3. That works for any advice really.

    5. For every bottle you drink, buy another and have your H hide it somewhere, with the instructions to only tell you where it is after you have a baby. 

    Eggs - Just hard boil eggs, cut in half, mix the yolks with mayo, spicy mustard, dill relish, salt, pepper, and a little garlic salt (sometimes I use ranch powder here too).  Stuff the yellow stuff back in the egg whites.  Try not to drool on your shirt.

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  • ToshaGirlToshaGirl member

    I'll trade you a massage for some photog lessons,

    Love my new camera (t2i) but not spectacular at using it yet :)

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  • leslie13510leslie13510
    imageCathyMD:

    I'll trade you a massage for some photog lessons,

    Love my new camera (t2i) but not spectacular at using it yet :)

    DONE!

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