Hawaii Babies

feeling guilty leaving LO

Our 3rd wedding anniversary is in 2 weeks. MIL has offered to take care of LO so we can have some time for ourselves and get away. We plan to go somewhere close (~2-3 hrs drive). DH & I were talking about it last night and we both feel bad in leaving LO :(. We only have weekends to really spend a lot of time with her. We plan to let her spend 2 nights at IL's house..drop her off Fri night and pick her up Sunday. She has only been away from us for one night back in Feb when we celebrated Valentines day. I do not have any concerns leaving LO with the IL's. MIL visits us once in a while and takes care of LO for a day or two whiel we're at work. I am sure we'll miss LO and talk about her the whole weekend that we're out lol. I told DH I know we both feel bad and will miss her but on the other hand, we both need the time alone. OK, thanks for letting me vent Stick out tongue.

Re: feeling guilty leaving LO

  • I don't have an answer for you... I'm sure you will figure it out  :)  But if you want to go I absolutely don't think you should feel guilty.  This is one weekend of many!  And I'm sure she has fun with your MIL.

    I know what you mean though, we do one night here and there but had trouble thinking about leaving him for the entire weekend. 

    Spending time together as a couple is important too.  We are going away this weekend but since it's not a romantic trip (exact opposite, DH is playing in a large basketball tournament festival thing) we just decided to bring LO.  I would feel differently if it was a date-like opportunity.  

     

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  • i completely understand feeling guilty.  I am the same way.  I have a hard time just running to the mall or target by myself b/c I feel like I hardly see her all week, I can't leave her again on the weekends.  But I know it is the quality of time I spend with her, not the quantity.  I told DH last night that we really need to get her to spend a night without us.  She is fine with anyone else during the day (thanks to daycare) and even once with my mom and once with DH's mom, they put her to bed when we went to a wedding, but she still wakes up all night and I am not sure how she would respond to someone else (what do I know...she might prefer someone else in the middle of the night! Stick out tongue)  I just remember those kids who had to have their mom come pick them up in the middle of the night from the slumber party b/c they couldn't handle being away from mom & dad that long & I don't want that for her.  I want her to be a little independent woman. 

    Maybe you will feel better if you only stay gone one night?  Or plan to stay one night for sure & then if you (and E) do great, then stay the extra night?

    well i don't know if I was any help at all, but just saying you are not alone AND happy anniversary!!!  Big Smile

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  • imagevanilla15:

    Maybe you will feel better if you only stay gone one night?  Or plan to stay one night for sure & then if you (and E) do great, then stay the extra night?

    This is a good idea!

    I think lots of people feel this way no matter how much time you get with your babe.  If you do go two nights don't feel guilty (I know it's SOOO hard).   You guys will come back refreshed and she'll be loved and happy with your IL's.

     

  • imagevanilla15:

    Maybe you will feel better if you only stay gone one night?  Or plan to stay one night for sure & then if you (and E) do great, then stay the extra night?

    This is a good idea!

    I think lots of people feel this way no matter how much time you get with your babe.  If you do go two nights don't feel guilty (I know it's SOOO hard).   You guys will come back refreshed and she'll be loved and happy with your IL's.

     

  • I'm feeling the same way!  I'm going to LA with my girlfriends this weekend from Fri-Sun so B will be home with K all weekend by himself.  I'm scared I'm going to miss her so much!  But I just got my new iPad 2 so I'm planning on Facetime while I'm gone.  :)  I also feel bad because I know I'd be afraid to be alone with her for 3 full days by myself.  She is a hand full and only naps like 45 min once a day! 
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  • Ditto here :)  We are going away for my 30th birthday (2 nights away) and LO will stay with my Mom and Aunt.  I am already feeling guilty and know my heart will break when we leave him but... I am kind of excited about going away with MH :)  It will be fun but I'm sure we will be racing home to see him at the end of the w/end.
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    Tara & Ian . 4/24/2008 . The Kahala Planning . Married

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  • don't feel guilty! go and enjoy yourselves (this coming from the mom who's never left her LO overnight before!) but please go and I'll live vicariously through you ;)

    it's just 2 night and honestly she won't even remember :) it's not like she is older and knows ;)

  • imagemrspresley:

    don't feel guilty! go and enjoy yourselves (this coming from the mom who's never left her LO overnight before!) but please go and I'll live vicariously through you ;)

    it's just 2 night and honestly she won't even remember :) it's not like she is older and knows ;)

    Yes all of this!

    Lately I've been thinking how nice it would be for Ben and I to go away somewhere for a night or two by ourselves...but then I worry about leaving the boys. I know they'd be fine, but mama guilt sets in and I get all concerned that they'd spend the whole night howling (unlikely, I know!). So I think it's great that you're overcoming that fear, because I know how you feel!

  • thanks all! we're definitely leaving LO for 2 nights. now, i am getting excited! i feel like i am going on a 1st date! lol.
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