Poll: How do you feel about drop-ins (of the MIL variety, not the bottles)

Ktwo09 · June 2011

My MIL dropped by today without calling, she is averaging one un-announced visit per week and it is DRIVING ME NUTS! We weren't doing anything major but it was still an interruption to our family time and to make matters worse - she had seen the twins the past two days and I had told her that we were looking forward to some QT on FATHER'S DAY.

Hope the back story doesn't skew the poll - I promise my feelings won't be hurt if you disagree

[Poll]

sasa625 · June 2011

Well, my MIL lives 2.5 hours away so she can't just drop in, but I would definitely be irritated if she did. I don't like surprise visitors at all. My ILs visited this weekend and they were supposed to get here at 5 on Thursday... they got here at 4 and I was annoyed, so I can only imagine how frustrating the surprise visits are!!

crystalgirl · June 2011

Dude, I don't even answer the door if I'm not expecting someone. That doesn't exactly work with someone who thinks they can just drop by unannounced!

superned · June 2011

No. Nope. No.

In the past, my FIL "dropped by" in the evening, when I have been on the couch, in my pajamas, eating dinner, and watching TV. DH wasn't even home! He just kind of sat there and we waited for DH to get home, but I was not about to offer him dinner (or get dressed!) when I had no idea he was coming over.

I don't like living with the fear that they might "drop in" any time. It's not like they're right around the corner, either. They live 1.5 hours away! They have PLENTY of time to warn us, but there are many times that they appear at my door (when it's too late for me to hide). Angry

dusk42 · June 2011

superned:
No. Nope. No.
In the past, my FIL "dropped by" in the evening, when I have been on the couch, in my pajamas, eating dinner, and watching TV. DH wasn't even home! He just kind of sat there and we waited for DH to get home, but I was not about to offer him dinner (or get dressed!) when I had no idea he was coming over.
I don't like living with the fear that they might "drop in" any time. It's not like they're right around the corner, either. They live 1.5 hours away! They have PLENTY of time to warn us, but there are many times that they appear at my door (when it's too late for me to hide).

This is CRAZY! 1.5 hours? So weird.

dana316 · June 2011

I detest visitors who just drop in without calling. My ILs would never dream of it, but my Dad would...he loves it.

When Caroline was born, we had to just flat out tell him, NO visits without calling. He got his feelings all hurt, and I just told him our reasoning. I was nursing her seemingly round the clock, and there were lots and lots of days that I would be totally topless or in a sleep bra. I told him he was welcome anytime, but to please do me the curtesy of giving me five damned minutes warning so I could put some clothes on.

klaus · June 2011

My MIL lives 1 mile from us and has recently (since LO was born) decided it's ok to knock and enter without waiting for a "come in" or for someone to get the door. It drives me insane. I like a PP am sometimes not "company ready". I definitely do things a lot different these days and a lot of times I nurse without my top on to avoid spit up and just get dressed afterward. I don't like to be worried that I am going to get walked in on.

We model the behavior by calling her to see if she is available before we drop in but, it doesn't seem to have worked....

Cajun_gal · June 2011

My dad was dropping in on us after DS1 was born. I had to have a talk with him a couple of times about it. I think it really hurt his feelings but we needed warning that we were going to have a visitor and needed to nip it in the bud before it got to be a usual thing. I think after the initial hurt feelings, he understood and it's been fine since. He'll call and ask when the kids are napping to see what time he can come visit. I'd really push for your husband to talk to his mom. I told my dad that I love that he wants to come see his grandson and visit and I want him to continue to do so as much as he'd like, hopefully very often, but that he needed to call before he came to make sure it was an okay time - we may be trying to rest and some times just aren't as good as others. Good luck!

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