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Two Under 2
erbear
member
ok, seasoned 2u2 moms, help!
erbear
member
in Two Under 2
I can't do this. I am home for the summer with both of them. It's been 2 days and I want to die. It does not help that in the last week DD2 has become this cranky, non-sleeping mess (needs to be rocked for 10-20 minutes, sleeps in 30-45 minute spurts, but only in her crib, cries a bunch for no apparent reason unless I'm holding her and walking around) and DD1, who has always been awesome, has becomes this clingy, tantrumy mess who cries at the drop of a hat and will not be by herself for a single moment.
I'm so frustrated! When I was working and had some help (and DD1 was in daycare), things went very smoothly. Do you think it's just transition from her being in school (which she loves) to being at home (which I imagine is not as fun)? Just an unluckly coincidence of ages?
HELP!
"Hello, babies. Welcome to Earth. It's hot in the summer and cold in the winter. It's round and wet and crowded. At the outside, babies, you've got about a hundred years here. There's only one rule that I know of, babies. God damn it, you've got to be kind."
- Kurt Vonnegut
This discussion has been closed.
Re: ok, seasoned 2u2 moms, help!
It could be a lot of factors - not being in school, change in family life, etc. That said, you CAN do this. You just need to hang in there and you'll find a system and schedule that works as you all get adjusted.
- get out of the house, a walk around the neighborhood, stroll through the mall
- give DD some play time with friends if possible (the park, a playdate at home, playdate at a friend's house). If you have a community center with toddler programs, this might be a great outlet for her energy.
- get a carrier!! You will be handsfree to care for DD1 and DD2 can be happy and content along for the ride. Both babies will feel like they have your attention and DD2 will likely sleep easily in it. I recommend Sleepy Wrap, Hava Sling, and Ergo Carriers. After about 4-month stage with DD I almost exclusively use my Ergo. I used the Wrap and Sling much longer with DS (and LOVED them still) because I didn't have the Ergo until he was 13 months.
- ask for help from any friends/family in the area
Lots and lots of walks.
Invest in a wrap if you don't already have one.
Cartoons.
I've so been there, and I'm sorry I don't have a good answer for you. Good luck?
Just remind yourself that this will all pass. Nothing is permanent.
My DD (and my DS if I remember correctly) had sleep issues around 4 months - they start really figuring out that there is a world out there, and don't want to miss anything. then they miss a nap, fight a nap, get overtired, and then the rest of the day is a screaming, fussy nightmare. I second the babywearing. My DD would hang out in the Baby Bjorn a LOT, and when she was fussy, she was much better in there. And, I don't quite remember how long this phase lasted, but I don't think it was too long (2 weeks or so?).
As for #1 - I think it is partly her age. My DS is acting the same way right now and he has really been trying my patience lately. I have been feeling awful since I get so frustrated I have resorted to yelling, and I hate that. I have found that getting out of the house helps everyone. DS gets to run around (at a playground or indoor playspace), get rid of energy, and interact with other kids (story time or music class).
With #1, it should be a few days before she adjusts to your new summer routine and hopefully she will start to figure out what comes next in the day and will feel like she has some control over it. We do the same general routine every day - wake up, breakfast, play, DD#2 naps while DS#1 watches Sesame and I shower, go out of the house, come back for lunch, naps, play outside or go for a walk, dinner, then bed. When we don't stick to that routine, DS is much more grumpy!
Good luck!
I just started summer break this week too. We go for a long stroller ride and down to the playground every morning. I luck out b/c they both take a long nap after lunch so I get some peaceful time. Most days I try to get out in the afternoon too. Not sure I can keep this up all summer, but so far it is working out ok.
GL! You will find your routine.
I have been staying home since July of 2010 (4 months before my son was born). I am now 6 weeks into a 7 month deployment AND staying home. So I am mom and dad 24/7 right now with no help.
How I stay sane:
1. I get out of the house every day. Even if it is just a quick trip to the grocery store I NEVER stay in all day long. It makes the day drag and makes us all a little cranky.
2. I joined the YMCA. There is free daycare and I can go exercise while they are safe and taken care of. It gives us all a good break.
3. Activities: My older one starts swimming lessons next week, we go to Library story time once per week, and I arrange play dates with other SAHM friends at least a few times per week.
4. I have a babysitter that comes one morning per week for 3-4 hours. This is time for me to do important things (doctor's appts. for myself, shopping in non-kid friendly places, etc) but also to do "me" things like pedicures, hair cuts, and coffee alone.
5. Don't be afraid to ask for help. My mom is a teacher and arrives on Friday of next week for the whole summer. This is unusual (I wouldn't do this if my husband wasn't on the other side of the world) but if you need have some old college friends you haven't seen in awhile, maybe invite them down during the week. It will help you pass time and you can do activities with a few extra sets of hands and eyes.
Good luck! I keep a blog (link in siggy) that documents my adventures with my kids. I started it when DH left for deployment. Attitude is everything - You can totally do this!
Married 6/28/03
Kate ~ 7/3/09 *** Connor ~ 11/11/10
4 miscarriages: 2007, 2009, 2013, 2014
*~*~*~*~*
No more TTC for us. We are done, and at peace, as a family of 4.
"Suffering has been stronger than all other teaching, and has taught me to understand what your heart used to be. I have been bent and broken, but – I hope – into a better shape.” — Charles Dickens
OK - deep breath. I think childhood (or at least babyhood, which is all I currently have experience with) is a series of phases. Every time one of my kids (8.5 months and 21 months) starts being a PITA, I tell myself it's a phase. DD1 is smack in the middle of the terrible twos, and although I still love her to bits, I admit that sometimes I don't like her very much. DD2 has gone through several no-napping, lots-of-crying phases, too.
Also, give yourself a break. It's been two days. You all need some time to settle into a new routine. I try to get out of the house every day, even if it's just a walk to the grocery store to buy something we could have done without. I also try to come up with activities to keep things interesting for DD1. She really loves this game where I put ice cubes in a bowl with a bit of water, then put a bit of water in another bowl, and give her a slotted spoon. She moves the cubes from one bowl to another. I lay a towel on the kitchen floor and she plays there. When she dumps the water out, the game is over.
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