Has IF changed your thoughts on names?

brookelynpaisley · June 2011

I was thinking this morning about how IF has changed the way I see some things, and I realized that baby naming is one of them. We have talked about names since we were engaged, and nailed down about 2 full names and 2-3 back-ups for each sex that we like and agree on. The name that I have loved since I was 16, Ainsley, was agreed upon as a middle name (DH wasn't crazy about it as a FN). Now that we are facing issues and may only have one (when before I took for granted how easily we'd have 2 kids). It makes me rethink that I'd push more for Ainsley as a FN because I like it so much and it may be my only shot at naming a kid.

Not to mention, I have thought more about using a middle name (or adding a second MN) with more meaning, rather than just a "filler" or something that sounds good with the FN we choose.

I guess IF has just made me feel like the name has to count for more, or be more significant in some way. Not that we didn't have names we really liked before, but now I feel moreso that I need to LOVE them. Anyone else?

katib77 · June 2011

Do you like Ainsley because of the show The West Wing? Because I LOVE that name and have met only one little girl with that name (when I was doing photography for JC Penneys) and they said it was because of the show they named her that.

As for your question. We still plan on Stephanie for girl FN because of DH's grandma, if we have two girls I get my choice of Brianna. No middle names discussed. As for boys we've only been throwing out name ideas for three years LOL. Nothing is decided except it won't be Michael because we have five in the family and three friends named that. For us it's one of the only things IF has not changed.

brookelynpaisley · June 2011

katib77:

Do you like Ainsley because of the show The West Wing? Because I LOVE that name and have met only one little girl with that name (when I was doing photography for JC Penneys) and they said it was because of the show they named her that.

Nope - my love affair with Ainsley is pre-West Wing. I don't remember where I found it, but I know I was in high school and I've loved it ever since.

palelilyblue · June 2011

It's so funny that you asked this question. I like to lurk over on the baby names board to see the names that women come up with. I've seen that you post there sometimes. However, I haven't felt comfortable posting anything, because I was concerned that it might bother you. Not sure how to word this, but since I am pretty new to bumping, I didn't want you to think you were being followed. I guess I'm just unsure of the etiquette for this stuff.

Anyway, to answer your question, IF has given us a lot more time to find names that we both really love. For a boy it was a lot easier for us and we have 2-3 names(we also have a no Michael rule due to number of friends/family). I used to be heart set on naming my daughter Frances (family name for me). However, MH vetoed it because it was his grandmother's name and apparently she's responsible for a lot of family issues. So now when we're down about IF we play around and try to come up with names for our hypothetical children. It let's us be lighthearted about this process (especially when we come up with some bad ones).

wordslikeswords · June 2011

We've known we were going to have trouble since we started, so we've always had this in mind. My DH really wants to pass down his name, which I'm not a fan of. We may only have 1 child, and I want a hand in naming it. I told him the only way I'd agree is if I could at least change the middle name and name him after my dad. Another name I don't like, but that's OK. If it's a girl, we're using the name we'd picked out originally - Elyse.

Julie721 · June 2011

IF has definitely given me more time to think about the names. Plus when we started injectables, the higher possibility of multiples made us want to come up with 2 boys and 2 girls names we like just in case it is twins (a little crazy, I know, but I am grasping at straws trying to find the fun in IF), here is what we have:

Girls:

Abigail Joy

Eleanor Marie

Boys

Benjamin Andrew

Hudson Jude

punkymama · June 2011

DH & I agree on names for a boy but not for a girl. I see your point of maybe pushing harder for the name you truly love, thanks to IF and it may be your only shot.

I'd be in your same situation. We can't agree on a girl's name. His latest name suggestion has been the best so far and that's London. I definitely want my kid's name to have meaning either because we use a grandparents name or by definition/sentiment.

IF also makes me feel strongly about not finding out the gender even though I'm anal and a huge planner. I feel like IF has robbed me of the other things so I want the gender to be a surprise since nothing about conceiving will be.

eta: I can't type

eponine7682 · June 2011

I feel the exact same way as some of your pps! In the beginning when we were all like "oh yay, we are going to have 3 kids" we picked out a bunch of names. One of DH's big things is that if it's a boy he wants it to have his same initials (A J). Well, I have liked the name Aiden since I was 6! My DH, Andrew, thought that was perfect! I am Irish, it's one of my favorite little boy names... then Sex in the City had to ruin it for me. Every little boy in the world that has been born in the past year and this year is names Aiden. Or some form of Aiden. Come on people!! It was a very rare name when I liked it and now I struggle. Do I name my child a name that I have loved forever? Or do I save him from being 1 of 10 Aidens in his class. Ugh!

So...now with us thinking we may only get to have 1 child, I am starting to resent that we must name a boy with the AJ initials because I am not a huge fan of any boy "a" names that aren't wicked popular. I like a lot of other names, but they don;t start with A. I figure we will feud this out when I actually get KU.

In terms of girls, we are still undecided about that one.

limpetfan · June 2011

I think IF has created more aggressive vetoing of names between my DH and I than we had pre-IF. We've always agreed to name the first girl Eva Rose, in honor of my 2 grandmothers. But we've never agreed on a boy name, and now that it might turn out we only have 1 child, and it could be 1 boy, it's making it that much harder for us to both say we like various suggestions. It's like the name would have to be perfect, and we just can't find something that's perfect to both of us.

bandwife928 · June 2011

I totally agree with this. I've always love thinking about and picking out baby names. I have always kept a running list of contenders saved on my computer. It used to have dozens of names. Now, I'm brutal about which names get to stay on there. Nearly every time I open it to add another name, I end up taking one or two off.

I also agree with the PP who said IF has made her want to not find out the gender. I'm not sure if my Type A personality will let me go through with it, but I agree with the sentiment!

amor_eterno · June 2011

punkymama:
IF also makes me feel strongly about not finding out the gender even though I'm anal and a huge planner. I feel like IF has robbed me of the other things so I want the gender to be a surprise since nothing about conceiving will be.

I totally agree with this!! DH and I have talked about names here and there, but we haven't decided anything. I feel like if we come up with a definite name we'll jinx ourselves somehow.

Bubs101 · June 2011

I've started to consider a couple names that I never would have picked before. Samuel for a boy (Biblical significance. His mother struggled with infertility and her story is an encouragement to me) and Hope for a girl. I don't think I would use these as first names, but I am thinking about them for middle names.

genmalone · June 2011

I agree that it seems more important now. I'm pretty sure we'll only have 1 unless we end of with twins so its a one shot deal. My DH is the III but luckily he doesn't want a IV. Thanks goodness because his name is awful! We have agreed on Austin for a boy after his maternal grandfather. I'm not crazy about it because we live in TX and tons of kids here are named Houston, Dallas, or Austin. It's important to him though so that's out boy name. For girl, we have originally picked Ellie but then it shot to the top of the baby name list. Then we decided on Elise but I've have 3 friends from high school use that name in the last year. I'm afraid its going to be top 10 by next year. My name is Emily and therefore I want to make sure I don't pick a really common name. I really like Maryn (pronounced like Karen). My grandmother that I adored was named Mary and I would love to name my daughter after her. My DH is crazy about it. I keep telling him I'm not crazy about Austin either but I'm giving in because its important to him. He's still not giving in!

brookelynpaisley · June 2011

palelilyblue:

It's so funny that you asked this question. I like to lurk over on the baby names board to see the names that women come up with. I've seen that you post there sometimes. However, I haven't felt comfortable posting anything, because I was concerned that it might bother you. Not sure how to word this, but since I am pretty new to bumping, I didn't want you to think you were being followed. I guess I'm just unsure of the etiquette for this stuff.

Silly girl! All the boards are open to any one. I see many of the girls here on TTGP and Baby Names. I'm sure they probably lurk and post other places, too. I would never think you were following me

eponine7682 · June 2011

Bubs101:
I've started to consider a couple names that I never would have picked before. Samuel for a boy (Biblical significance. His mother struggled with infertility and her story is an encouragement to me) and Hope for a girl. I don't think I would use these as first names, but I am thinking about them for middle names.

I adore the name Hope! Good picks, I will have to re-read the part of the bible!

palelilyblue · June 2011

palelilyblue:

It's so funny that you asked this question. I like to lurk over on the baby names board to see the names that women come up with. I've seen that you post there sometimes. However, I haven't felt comfortable posting anything, because I was concerned that it might bother you. Not sure how to word this, but since I am pretty new to bumping, I didn't want you to think you were being followed. I guess I'm just unsure of the etiquette for this stuff.

Silly girl! All the boards are open to any one. I see many of the girls here on TTGP and Baby Names. I'm sure they probably lurk and post other places, too. I would never think you were following me

Thanks

I knew I was being silly!

I am Marla Singer · June 2011

I think the only real change in baby naming since IF has been- we don't talk about it much any more. I am becoming quite superstitious and I don't wanna jinx anything. (definitely a topic for therapy!)

I LOVE the name Harper for a girl. LOVE IT... DH and his family- not so much. I haven't completely given up on it- but we will see. As for boy names- we can't seem to come up with something we both like- and- as I said above- we haven't talked about it lately...

coloradoalyssa · June 2011

When IF gets us down we try to stay positive by talking about baby things, such as baby names, for when it DOES happen. We have picked two boys and two girl names now that we have a chance of multiples:

Boys

Jackson (Jack) Oliver (MIL's father was Jack and FIL father was Oliver)

Quinn Alexander (Just like Quinn and Alexander was my Great Grandma's maiden name)

Girls

Lillie Louise (Lillie because its my favorite flower (even though spelled different) and Louise was my great grandma's name and DH's grandma's middle name)

Harper Grace (Harper is a name from my favorite book and Grace just because I like it)

ccam · June 2011

Julie721:
IF has definitely given me more time to think about the names. Plus when we started injectables, the higher possibility of multiples made us want to come up with 2 boys and 2 girls names we like just in case it is twins (a little crazy, I know, but I am grasping at straws trying to find the fun in IF), here is what we have:
Girls:
Abigail Joy
Eleanor Marie

Boys
Benjamin Andrew
Hudson Jude

Love Abigail - that's one of our choices, too. DH actually suggested it.
ETA: I guess IF hasn't really changed our thoughts on names, but it has given us much more time to think. Names we liked a year ago are not what we like now but I just think that has been the time, not so much the IF like you're saying.

JennPierog · June 2011

We have had our names picked out before we were even married. (we were together 10 years before we got married) Our girl name is Olivia Ann I picked this name about 6 years ago. Now its the new Jennifer EVERYONE is named Olivia. I would hate to change it since we kinda already think of our unborn daughter as Olivia.(kinda weird I know) Our boy name is set Jason Gilbert.

kathrynlo · June 2011

I don't think IF has really changed our thoughts on names. Like another post said, we don't really talk about names that much any more. I wish we did, maybe it would take my mind off this hard journey we are all going through. We do have 1 boy and 1 girl name picked. Both MNs having mean to us.

Boy - Evan Michael (Evan bc we both actually agree on the name and Michael is MHs name and his dad's name. My nephew is already named after my father so we thought it'd be nice to name a son after DHs father)

Girl - Madelyn Irene (Madelyn has always been a name I loved, whether or not its now popular. And Irene is my grandmother's (my mother's mom) name)

KaliChick · June 2011

I'm not so sure it's changed my thoughts on names, but it's definitely made me think more about middle names like Faith, Hope, etc ... names I don't particularly care for, but words that have gotten me through this process. My husband loves my middle name (Brooke) but I'm not sold on it ... I've liked Brooklyn and I had thought of Brooklyn Elise (his grandmother is Elsie) but now I think Brooklyn Faith or Brooklyn Hope ... and when I actually get pregnant (and especially if it's a boy) it could all go out the window.

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