WDYD when kids think discipline is funny?

Re: WDYD when kids think discipline is funny?

• Seattle_JiLLn

  June 2011

  Sometimes with Ben it's more effective if I get quieter or just calmly walk away.  I'll sometimes say things like "when you are ready to be nice to me, I will talk to you" and leave.  

  Sometimes I go ballistic and yell louder than I'm proud of.  It is sometimes effective at getting his attention, but I am never happy that I did it.  So I'm trying to not.

  I do think surprising them with your seriousness can be effective.  Taking the couch away must have really showed them you mean business!  I have picked Ben up and taken him over my shoulder up the stairs and put him in his room before and walked away.  And once a long time ago I put him in the car naked when he refused to get dressed.    

  OH.... I often count backwards from 5.  It's gotten tot he point where sometimes if I just say "5..." he freaks out saying "stop counting I'm doing it stop mommy!!"...  Now I've set that up by saying You need to come here in the count of five or we won't have books, or I'll take the toy away, or you'll be in time out or whatever.   So now I can sometimes just say 5 without even telling him what will happen at 0.    But really I should still be telling him what happens.  Steve does it and gets to 0 and nothing happens.  So it's not as effective.  But with me, Ben knows there are consequences.  

  So I'm not sure if any of that helps... sometimes it just all goes to hell and I end up yelling or crying or just giving up until one of them gets hurt and then it's all I can do to not yell "I told you so!"

  When things go really badly, a few hours later when things are calm again I will try to talk to Ben about the "hard time we had" and have him help me come up with ideas on how to make that not happen again...  

  

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• AnnetteWalker

  June 2011

  I wish I knew as well. R does some of the same kinds of things. Laughing when we discipline. It is very frustrating for me.

  
  
  Oct 2011 3 1/2 years old.
  Robert Williams Birth date 5/16/2008

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• ChubbyCheekiesMom

  June 2011

  Seattle_JiLLn:

  Sometimes with Ben it's more effective if I get quieter or just calmly walk away.  I'll sometimes say things like "when you are ready to be nice to me, I will talk to you" and leave.  

  Sometimes I go ballistic and yell louder than I'm proud of.  It is sometimes effective at getting his attention, but I am never happy that I did it.  So I'm trying to not.

  I do think surprising them with your seriousness can be effective.  Taking the couch away must have really showed them you mean business!  I have picked Ben up and taken him over my shoulder up the stairs and put him in his room before and walked away.  And once a long time ago I put him in the car naked when he refused to get dressed.    

  OH.... I often count backwards from 5.  It's gotten tot he point where sometimes if I just say "5..." he freaks out saying "stop counting I'm doing it stop mommy!!"...  Now I've set that up by saying You need to come here in the count of five or we won't have books, or I'll take the toy away, or you'll be in time out or whatever.   So now I can sometimes just say 5 without even telling him what will happen at 0.    But really I should still be telling him what happens.  Steve does it and gets to 0 and nothing happens.  So it's not as effective.  But with me, Ben knows there are consequences.  

  So I'm not sure if any of that helps... sometimes it just all goes to hell and I end up yelling or crying or just giving up until one of them gets hurt and then it's all I can do to not yell "I told you so!"

  When things go really badly, a few hours later when things are calm again I will try to talk to Ben about the "hard time we had" and have him help me come up with ideas on how to make that not happen again...  

  I do ALL of what Jill said.  And I feel the same way about getting fed up and yelling loudly.  I try to do the ignoring when he is screaming but living in an Apartment makes that tough.  I'm in the same boat as you Twinmommy, it's tough, and I don't really have any advice for you, but I know it's nice to know you aren't alone either! ((hugs)).
  

  

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• StellaZ

  June 2011

  I'm still at the "taking notes stage" but from what I've gathered the key is...
  
  *Remain calm (they sense when you've lost control, hence it's funny when you're "mad")
  *Be consistent (both parents!)
  *ALWAYS follow-through!
  
  Grady knows when I say "that's too bad" that he's off to his room to reflect on making a poor choice (or, you know, the 2 yr old equivalent). He cries as soon as he hears the words. He hates the "punishment" (being removed from us, yet he is in his room with all his toys, go figure).  But seems to be calming down quicker each time so he can come out faster (for now anyway).

  Here's an article I've saved... "Promises & Requests"  (Love & Logic)
  
  

  recipes | don't break the piggy bank | pinterest
  
  

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