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Cincinnati Babies
long random post
I love sherbet.
DH does our laundry and while I am incredibly grateful I hate that my clothes always come out wrinkled. I am not good at ironing so I just throw them in the dryer and hope they are less wrinkled when they come out than they were when they went in.
I felt judged by a friend today and it made me sad. I told her we don't let the boys on the couch and she acted like I was crazy. I have two babies. They are very busy. When they climb on the couch they bounce from end to end and run into each other. They both have already fell off the couch. C fell onto the top of his head. I had to monitor him to make sure he didn't have a concussion or any of the scary symptoms that go along with traumatic brain injury. It was an awful experience that I don't care to relive. So while I know they will be on the couch eventually I don't feel like it is a necessity now. Am I crazy? Surely other people don't let their 16 months old on the couch.
My best friend and I had a falling out a year and a half ago and we recently reconnected via FB and text...just in time for her to move to Houston. We tried to set up a time for me to go visit while she was still within driving distance but we couldn't find a time that worked with both of our schedules. She is moving far away from her friends and family because her husband is a college football coach and has to take a job where he can get one. Her father died a few months ago, her sister just had a baby, and one of her children has been diagnosed with autism. I wish she didn't have to go.
Our kids eat a lot of mac and cheese. A LOT. I don't know what other "side items" I can feel the boys. Sometimes we'll do sweet potato fries but aside from that I am at a loss. They don't eat veggies so they are out. What side dishes do you feed 16 month olds that use their spoons to play with and not eat with?
I have been internalizing most of the struggles I am dealing with right now. I know I should go talk to someone about everything that's going on in my life but I just keep bottling it up even though I know it's not healthy.
I owe a fellow nestie a book and I haven't been to the post office to put it in the mail it even though I had the best intentions of mailing it last week (sorry Katie).
That about covers all my thoughts. Oh wait, I also love s'mores...and cookies 
What are your random thoughts/confessions today?
This discussion has been closed.
Re: long random post
I just have one. OMG! MY BOOBS HURT! I am now almost 19 weeks pregnant and they still hurt! WTH? I thought this crap would have subsided after the 1st trimester.
Thats all.
Griffin 10/2007
I don't iron, and I wear wrinkled clothes. I don't care.
I'm tired of pretending that my BFF and I are still friends. I'm tired of her openly judging and criticizing me. But after 25 years of friendship, I feel obligated to not 'end it'.
I'm envious that everything seems to fall right into place for my SIL, without her really trying.
Alex eats hot dogs, frozen chicken nuggets (I do microwave them, he doesn't actually eat them frozen) and mac n cheese for almost every dinner. I made his baby food, but I can't cook.
I tend to internalize all of my feelings, because I'm usually busy dealing with other people's.
I could eat 24 hours a day. Right now, I'm eating peanut butter M&M's.
I am trying really hard to quit smoking, but I find that I don't really want to. I know I have to though.
I'm seriously looking forward to a date night DH and I have this weekend, at a friend's wedding. And I can't wait for next weekend, when I get to hang out with some good friends, that I don't have to pretend to like.
I haven't felt like myself in a long time. I've been hanging onto about 35 pounds of extra weight from my pregnancies. I feel like I'm surrounded by women who just have babies and then go right back to looking perfect. It makes me feel like a failure.
I don't really know who I am, in general. I've been a wife, and mom, for going on 5 years, and that's my whole life. I am completely grateful for everything I have, I just wish that I could find a hobby, or something that I'm good at, or like.
I really want a Rolo McFlurry.
I wish we could pay off our debt.
We are going to tour a private school tomorrow for Jack, and I have no idea how we can possibly afford it. I really don't want to send him to Little Miami with the state the school is in. I'm all for public schools, and I'm pissed that if I lived in a better district I wouldn't even have to think about touring private schools or worry about how to pay for it.
I'm super cranky in the morning if I don't have coffee. It's kind of annoying. I mean, I'm like a completely different person once I've had my coffee.
I'm nervous that I might be pregnant.
Whew! Feels a little better to get some of that off my chest:)
I hate cooking. With a passion. I don't mind baking things like delicious chocolate chip cookies, but cooking is not for me.
My son eats chicken nuggets way too much. Lately I can't get him to eat anything other than chicken nuggets, cereal bars, and any bread/cracker type product.
I'm not looking forward to the 3's. I try to remind myself that a temper tantrum is childish, but sometimes I want to throw one too.
I'm tired of dh and I passing by each other. He's always on the phone, we never eat dinner at a normal hour (we finished 30 minutes ago), and it's getting old. TTT, if you read this, we have not yet had time to even discuss my 'husband for hire' desires...
I dislike my yard. It's disgusting and embarrassing.
And to identicaltwins... many of your sentiments sound normal to me. Sending you big hugs.
I can't stand to see people smack their kids in public. We spent the evening at Kings Island, which means I saw plenty of that, and it is awful. I know it's judgmental, but yes, I do judge the trashy-looking lady in a bathing suit top and short jorts two sizes too small who yelled at her kids in the middle of the park and whacked one for not walking fast enough. It makes me sad.
Every once in a while, my husband will be driving us somewhere (in my car) and not look to the right before turning left in a parking lot or something like that and nearly get us killed. And when he does this, he always blames it on a "blind spot." Dude, I drive that car every day. There is no blind spot there. It's called not looking before you turn.
He also is working in the basement finishing it all the time. I know it needs to get done and I want it to get done, but I am getting really resentful as I parent an increasingly bratty 3-year-old and handle all the other housework on my own.
I have been feeling seriously lonely lately and am not sure what to do about that anymore.
I really do not miss working at all and do not know when I will want to go back or what I will want to do when the time comes. I never thought I'd feel that way, but I do. I miss the adult interaction and the money, but not much else about working.
Photo by Melissa Nicole Photography
I had a similar thought Monday when I was there too. It does make me sad.
And it also makes me sad seeing multiple people with skin cancer scars wearing tube tops and halter tops... and letting their kids wear them too. I'm not fashion savvy, but I wouldn't want to show off those kinds of scars.
I don't like to play. I really don't.. I love to take DS places, love to interact...but sit and play blocks?? Ugh. Not a fan.
I can't stand people on FB who constantly complain...especially about their kids. (no one here, just in general!) I understand sometimes... But the constant negativity just annoys me.
I'm really indecisive about trying for a VBAC this time or getting a RCS. I go back and forth and it's driving me nuts. The more research I do, the more I question both instead of leaning more towards one.
Today at work we were out of liquid coffee creamer because I'm the only one at work who buys it and several others use it. So I brought a little cup from home just so I would have some to use. Hoping someone else will go buy some.
Hoping that if I become pregnant with #2 it will change my BM so that DD will wean naturally on her own. I really don't want to have to wean her I don't think I'll be able to handle it. Not ready to wean or be pregnant but just secretly hope it all works out with no stress...
DH makes me feel like the worst housewife ever because everytime he is home all day with DD he gets SO much cleaning done. When it is my day off we never get anything done. I love coming home to a clean house though but I can't help but feel guilty.
I am bashing on the bowl of homemade guac that I made. Now I'm craving something sweet...cookies maybe?
Thanks for sharing all the things on your mind and thanks for letting us word vomit our thoughts to you. Whew feeling much better ha ha.
I never feel like I'm giving either of my children all the attention and love that they need and it's slowly eating me up inside.
Living with my passive aggressive mother has me on pins and needles and stressed out all the time. She was out of town for four days this week and it was pure bliss.
Watching reruns of Buffy the Vampire Slayer on Teen Nick are the highlight of my evenings.
I couldn't decide between two different types of Ben & Jerry's, so I bought them both.
Don't feel ashamed. It happens more times than I'd like to admit in this house too. There are many times when I feel like DH is better at parenting than I am....I am definitely the disciplinarian in the house. And unfortunately I get my yelling temper from my dad. I hate it. I'm working really hard to not be this way.
DS is going to be 3 1/2 in a month and is still not even close to being potty trained. I mean, we can't even get him to sit on the potty or on his Cars seat on the big potty with his clothes on! So Friday we are implementing new rules including, "no morning cartoons til you sit on the potty." I don't care if he goes or not, I just want him to sit there. Grrr.....
DS has dessert almost every night of the week. He is a pretty good eater anyway, but he's an even better eater with the promise of dessert. He doesn't have to clean his plate or anything and dessert usually isn't a big deal. Tonight he chose 10 jelly beans as his dessert.
I am totally and completely dreading preschool. DS is hooked to my hip and I know day 1 is going to be pure hell. After watching the way he interacts in tumbling and story time, I'm afraid he's going to get labeled as a trouble maker. He is very stubborn and will not do anything he doesn't want to do.....and that includes most activities in a group. He did great 1:1 with his teacher in tumbling but wants no part of group stuff. I can feel the gray hairs popping out already!
Wow....this is getting long, but I couldn't forget about DD! I still haven't figured her out yet. Half the time I think she's hungry and she's not and then she refuses to nurse. She was a hot mess last night and I had no idea how to help her. She ended up crying herself to sleep (in like 2 min but it felt like forever) and it was just awful. But I could do nothing to soothe her and that made me sad.
Jennie
Are you inside my brain?
I'm with Traycee - I HATE (& yes I know this is a horrible/strong word) Kevin's mother who is coming into town on Thursday. I'm dreading it with a passion - it has ruined my whole week. She is the moodiest lady I've ever been around. One minute she is nice as can be then the next the bitchiest ever!! When she found out I was pregnant she honestly did not want me to have him. She thought he was going to be "messed up" with all my medical conditions that I have. She won't put Nolan down - it's almost obsession like which is so weird to me considering the above. I won't hardly hold him from Th-Sunday. I'm secretly looking forward to the day that Nolan is at a age where he 'wants' me & can have outstretched arms reaching for me. I know this is awful but it's true. She doesn't respect me as his mom - if I say I think he needs/wants...... She always will suggest that it's something else & she knows because she had four kids. arrrggghhhh it drives me CRAZY!! Like I don't know my child!! It also doesn't help that to Kevin she can do no wrong. He admits that she is moody but hardly any other of her faults.
She honestly asked Kevin last night if I had anywhere to go while she was here so that she could watch Nolan herself for a day. She doesn't think it's "healthy" how much time that I spend with him & that we are never a part. UMMM NOOOO I'm not leaving!! She also always seems to mention every time we visit that if we lived closer that she wouldn't work so that she could take care of Nolan & that I would just "have to" go back to work so she could do so. Never would happen. I choose to be a SAHM because I wanted & we were financially able to do so. She also makes little remarks about me not working now which is none of her business. She complains that she never gets to see Nolan. She has seen him every month since he has been born for 4-5 days at a time. I would hardly qualify that has "never" - that's more than some grandparents that live in the city get to see their grandchildren.
I told Kevin that this time I'm not biting my tongue. Nolan got so off schedule last time we visited that it took me forever to repair the damage. The only good thing is that she lives in Michigan so we have our distance. This is going to sound really bad/horrible but she also has more money than she knows what to do with so she always takes us shopping for Nolan- which makes me happy (bad I know but true.)
Sorry that was so long but man do I feel better!!
Another thing-
I have days like today where I'm so happy just staying home with Nolan that I just sit/stare/play with him & before I know it the day is almost over. I honestly haven't done anything around the house, etc. so I run around frantically trying to make it look like I've cleaned or done something before Kevin gets home. I feel guilty I don't do more - especially when he starts cleaning/making dinner/laundry - I really feel like this is my job now. I sometimes blame Nolan for being cranky/having a difficult day when he really hasn't to hide the fact that I didn't do anything around the house
I have had a long week with Katelyn. She had a 104 fever for 2.5 days straight and was so inconsolable. I just laid there and cried with her because I didn't know what else to do.
On Saturday night, she ate one Rold Gold Mini Pretzel and had an allergic reaction. I felt so stupid because I missed an ingredient on the bag: Malt extract. I don't know how I didn't see this. She woke up with an all over body rash on Sunday and was super irritable. We had a photo session with JenRose on Sunday morning and it was a disaster. I was near tears. She didn't even take one picture because Katelyn was such a hot mess. I felt so bad, but feel very grateful that Jen is awesome and very understanding.
I had a very close friend tell me that she and her husband get irate when she has to pack a lunch for her daughter's field trips for day care and they can't contain nuts. She gave her daughter a Clif bar and they took it away from her because of trace tree nuts. She said, "where are my daughter's rights?" She also said that if her kids attended that school in Florida where the class has to wash their hands and use mouthwash, she would pull her kids out of there in a heartbeat. It infringes on their rights and it isn't fair to punish them. I can understand why she feels this way, but if you would give her kid the allergy, I know she would think differently. It makes me sad to think about how people just don't care if they don't have to deal with it. My daughter's life is at stake.
We had allergy testing re-done for Katelyn on Friday. She had 6 things skin tested and the other 35 blood tested. Her peanut is awful and the allergist said he is really worried about it. She is still allergic to milk and casein and now grass. I seriously ache inside and dread the summer. She won't be able to run around in her swimsuit with no shoes on through the grass and eat ice cream cones like everyone else. I hope she doesn't feel left out. Everytime we have an allergy appointment, I get so emotional and depressed for days. I am still waiting on the blood test results.
My best friend from college stopped talking to everyone 6 years ago when she called off her wedding. I was her maid of honor. She moved to Texas and she recently wrote me a FB email. We have sent a few messages back and forth over the years (like 2-3 a year). I will never understand why she cut everyone out of her life. I don't know if I should respond.
I am 35 1/2 weeks pregnant and haven't stopped having contractions for more than 10 minutes in over 3 weeks. I am officially miserable.
AND- I think I am in early labor. I hurt. I have contractions five minutes apart but until I can't talk through them there is no point in calling or going in because I have an irritable uterus. Once you get that diagnoses, no one cares what the hell is going on unless you are in agony. My emotional and mental well being is SHOT to hell and back but I am supposed to just "deal" since it is either deliver with a NICU baby or me be miserable. Don't get me wrong, I would much rather little guy cook and be healthy- but mentally I am losing grip on reality. And it doesn't help that since Sept. 2009 I haven't been pregnant for only 15 weeks.
My daughter is too smart for my good. She learned how to unlock my iphone today. She did it a dozen times in a row. I'm in trouble ladies.
Our new house is so much nicer than I ever thought I would live in. I grew up poor. As in my neighbor was a prostitute (and over 60- not pretty!) and people dealt drugs on the street corner a lot. My parents did all they could for us kids and spent every dime on our educations or taking care of us. I still cannot believe where I am today. I married a man from England- girls in my neighborhood got pregnant at 13 and married a guy that joined a gang, or didn't get married and have 5 kids by 4 baby daddy's and live off govt assistance. Yup, that is the area I grew up in. The fact that we have a nice home and it's safe makes me so thankful.
I don't deserve my husband. Seriously... this guy is a saint. I don't know how I got him but I honestly think I hit the jackpot. And lately I feel like a horrible wife. I need to do better for him- he deserves it.
Oh Jennie, I am in potty training hell right now. I wasn't going to sweat it, except he comes home from daycare and they tell us he was in underwear all day (except for his nap), didn't have any accidents, and sits on the potty like a champ. At home, he doesn't want to go, or wear underwear. It would be one thing if I felt like he wasn't ready, but if he can do it at daycare he's obviously ready. The fact that he knows what to do, but chooses not to do it at home is the most frustrating thing of all. It's driving me crazy. This could be why I've been dreading potty training since I got my BFP.
I am allergic to grass but thought that it is more of an environmental allergy... like to the pollen. I have no idea. Don't mind me if I am saying something completely stupid of course. I am definitely not the expert on this.
I'm so frustrated with DH at the moment. I know it's been one thing after another since I got into the car accident, but no progress has been made whatsoever on our kitchen and it's driving me crazy! That makes the upstairs bathroom partially done, the kitchen partially done, the downstairs bathroom partially done, the back and side doors partially done, the basement partially done, one of the spare rooms partially done. I just can't take it right now. I'm tempted to start giving him a list of stuff to get done while I'm at work. I know he'll crab and tell me I'm not his boss, but when I'm at work all day and you're at home all day and I come home and the house looks the same way it did when I left, it ticks me off!
I really really have to bite my tongue and not say anything nasty to my BFF who is pregnant. Everything she freaking posts on FB is crabbing about how awful everything is. I just want to post "You know! Sure it's awful, but there are quite a few people out there who would give anything to be miserable and pregnant, so STFU." Yesterday she posted about how her baby bump grew overnight and now she is just so fat and has to go out and buy maternity clothes and doesn't have the money for them. It's becoming harder and harder to hold my tongue. It doesn't make things easier when you've been trying for so long with no success and they weren't even trying and boom. Pity party for one over here.
I don't feel like I fit in anywhere. My friends are all either married with kids or single. And I'm kinda just..here.
I'm meeting a band in under two weeks that has one of my celebrity crushes in it. I'm in minor (or..major) freakout mode right now. I don't know what I'm going to even say to them. I'm hoping that I don't pass out or stutter like a moron.