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Henry cannot play independently and it's driving me INSANE

cjsbdlcjsbdl member
in Success after IF

If we're all home on the weekends he does just fine, but if it's just me with them during the week he wants my constant attention. And I've always given it to him. But, really, this is just insane. I cannot get anything done...the to-do list just keeps growing, the laundry piles up and I spend all my time when they're sleeping running around trying to accomplish all the things I can't do during the day. This can't continue.

So today I parked him in our office, gave him a bucket of cars/trucks/trains/etc and tried to get a few things done--phone calls, appointments made, email answered, etc--which resulted in him crawling all over me, hitting me with his trains, pulling everything off my desk, wrapping himself up in the computer cords, and finally having a major meltdown because I wasn't paying attention to him.

I just do not understand. He obviously knows how to play on his own and will happily do it when there are other people around, just not when we are alone.

This is not a function of me not spending enough time with him one-on-one...we don't get as much of that time as I'd like, but we do get some and he's getting plenty of attention from both me and DH, despite the new baby.

Any suggestions on how I can remedy this situation? Because I'm totally losing my cool over it.

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Re: Henry cannot play independently and it's driving me INSANE

  • LoveMyGirlzLoveMyGirlz
    That is frustrating. I would try something like, tell him he can play with his toys/artwork/whatever for 10 minutes without interrupting you. You need to get a few things done. After those 10 minutes, you'll read a book to him. Something like that. And then of course follow through. I realize ignoring him for those 10 minutes might be difficult as he's trashing your office, but he needs to learn boundaries and that he needs to listen. Gradually increase the tim depending on what you need to et done, etc. Maybe set a timer if you think he'll respond to that. Good luck. Hopefully it's just a phase. I'm sure you spend enough 1:1 time with him, he's just testing his limits which is his job right now:)
    Cricket's Cadence
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  • dulcinea03dulcinea03 member
    Little kids don't have a great sense of time, so if you use the above suggestion, I'd suggest setting a timer. That way, there's a hard and fast "ok, time is up" to help him through.
    TTC#1 since Mar 2008. Serious MFI due to cancer. 3 cancelled IUI's, just about every test in the book. IVF#1 - BFP! Twin girls arrived 2/5/10 at 35w2d. Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
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