Question...

bmnjd51702 · June 2011

We are planning to start TTC once I finally get my first AF after MC...still waiting though. We had a condom misshap 2 1/2 wks ago and when I used a OPK to make sure I wasn't about to O and of course it was positive. I seriously doubt that the one slip up we had will result in BFP but AF is just determined not to show up. Has anyone had a similar situation and was just to scared to test. I really don't think I am but I am just terrified to test and it be a chemical BFP just to have AF show up a few days later. I just don't know how long I should wait especially since I was super regular prior to MC.

MDT082010 · June 2011

I would just POAS. If you do get a positive go straight to PGAL.

I was "regular" until my loss. Since my loss my cycle length has increased by 4-6 days depending on the month.

ClaraEarlene · June 2011

It can take a really long time to get your first AF after a miscarriage, and your cycles may or may not be regular right away. Even though you had a positive OPK, it doesn't mean you Oed for sure. If you don't think you can handle a chemical pregnancy, you should wait it out for a few more weeks. Did you have your HCG levels monitored after your m/c? If you still have some in your system, it could give you a false positive HPT.

corndog8 · June 2011

MDT082010:
I would just POAS. If you do get a positive go straight to PGAL.
I was "regular" until my loss. Since my loss my cycle length has increased by 4-6 days depending on the month.

I agree with MDT - I would POAS and if postive, head straight to PgAL.

If neg. wait a few days, try again and if AF shows up, stick around.

corndog8 · June 2011

ClaraEarlene:
It can take a really long time to get your first AF after a miscarriage, and your cycles may or may not be regular right away. Even though you had a positive OPK, it doesn't mean you Oed for sure. If you don't think you can handle a chemical pregnancy, you should wait it out for a few more weeks. Did you have your HCG levels monitored after your m/c? If you still have some in your system, it could give you a false positive HPT.

I also agree with this. It may depend on your body how long it takes to get your first AF.

Missa_g · June 2011

MDT082010:
I would just POAS. If you do get a positive go straight to PGAL.
I was "regular" until my loss. Since my loss my cycle length has increased by 4-6 days depending on the month.

Just because you got a positive OPK doesn't mean you for sure Oed. Please take a HPT. If positive post on PGAL, if negative please come introduce yourself and join in!

Missa_g · June 2011

Missa_g:
MDT082010:
I would just POAS. If you do get a positive go straight to PGAL.
I was "regular" until my loss. Since my loss my cycle length has increased by 4-6 days depending on the month.
Just because you got a positive OPK doesn't mean you for sure Oed. Please take a HPT. If positive post on PGAL, if negative please come introduce yourself and join in!

Opps, just saw that you introduced yourself on the 30th. So if the HPT is negative please start joining in!

bmnjd51702 · June 2011

I had a neg test when I went to the doctor when I started MC'ing. They didn't check my levels but I did have a neg HPT a week ago. It just seems like the longer it takes for AF to show up the more anxious/nervous I am. I'm sure I'm just stressing over nothing. I guess I'm just really hoping that my cycles will go back to the way they were for TTC sake.

ClaraEarlene · June 2011

bmnjd51702:
I had a neg test when I went to the doctor when I started MC'ing. They didn't check my levels but I did have a neg HPT a week ago. It just seems like the longer it takes for AF to show up the more anxious/nervous I am. I'm sure I'm just stressing over nothing. I guess I'm just really hoping that my cycles will go back to the way they were for TTC sake.

I don't blame you for hoping. I wasn't regular before my pregnancy (just coming off the pill), and I'm hoping that I'll have somewhat regular cycles before we start TTC again in August. Hoping, but not really expecting. Are you charting at all?

bmnjd51702 · June 2011

Umm...I have an app on my phone that tracks my cycle and estimates ovulation and most fertile days. Other than just plugging in first day of LMP and adding notes throughout the cycle if I need to that's really all I do right now. I haven't done temps at all because I work night shift and my schedule is never really the same so I think the temps would be really hard for me. Also other than checking CM I'm not sure what else to do as far as charting.

ClaraEarlene · June 2011

bmnjd51702:
Umm...I have an app on my phone that tracks my cycle and estimates ovulation and most fertile days. Other than just plugging in first day of LMP and adding notes throughout the cycle if I need to that's really all I do right now. I haven't done temps at all because I work night shift and my schedule is never really the same so I think the temps would be really hard for me. Also other than checking CM I'm not sure what else to do as far as charting.

I used to chart just my CM and cervical position/opening prior to my first pregnancy. Now, I'm temping so that I can see if/when I'm ovulating, but I don't have plans to use OPKs. With FertilityFriend, you can track your OPKs, along with CM. Apps that try to predict ovulation are based off of the erroneous assumption that everyone has a 28 day cycle with ovulation on day 14--that's simply not the case, especially after a miscarriage. OPKs and monitoring your CM can help better pinpoint ovulation.

ECHC829 · June 2011

Hate to be the one to add snark to this post, especially since everyone has responded fairly calmly and respectfully.... but no one on this board knows whats going on inside your uterus. Coming to vent that you are scared to POAS will garner no sympathy... we'll all go through it each and every cycle, and so far, were all still here (meaning it wasn't a positive outcome)....

I suggest taking a test to help ease your worries of the 'whats going on'..... the anxiety of another pregnancy will not go away, ask the ladies on PgAL about that.... I'm sure it gets worse after the BFP then it is during ttcal.... but I wouldn't know, I'm still here.

again, I'm sorry if that came out really b!tchy, but we get one of these post about once a week... it's always the same. We aren't doctors, we're not psychic. Best of luck with the HPT!

GraceInCA · June 2011

I think the wise thing to do is to take a HPT. Good luck to you!

bmnjd51702 · June 2011

Yeah I don't think I'm going to be posting on this board any more. I asked a simple question. I'm sorry that some people were offended by my question but I also figured that some of you may have had a similar experience. I hate that we have all had to go through a MC or PL but seriously you want people to be compassionate and be hopeful for you that you will get and stay pregnant and have a healthy baby at the end of it all. So why is there the need to be B!TCHY!?!? I know that no one is psychic or knows what is going on with someone else, but I was asking if anyone had the same experience or feelings. This was my first MC and no I don't know what to expect, still haven't gotten my first AF and asking for advice. I understand that emotions are running high and many of us are very hormonal but geez!! No wonder there are tons of people that just lurk and never post or ask questions...I thought these boards were for support and to be able to have someone to talk to, people that are going through similar situations. But I guess I was wrong...

ECHC829 · June 2011

bmnjd51702:
Yeah I don't think I'm going to be posting on this board any more. I asked a simple question. I'm sorry that some people were offended by my question but I also figured that some of you may have had a similar experience. I hate that we have all had to go through a MC or PL but seriously you want people to be compassionate and be hopeful for you that you will get and stay pregnant and have a healthy baby at the end of it all. So why is there the need to be B!TCHY!?!? I know that no one is psychic or knows what is going on with someone else, but I was asking if anyone had the same experience or feelings. This was my first MC and no I don't know what to expect, still haven't gotten my first AF and asking for advice. I understand that emotions are running high and many of us are very hormonal but geez!! No wonder there are tons of people that just lurk and never post or ask questions...I thought these boards were for support and to be able to have someone to talk to, people that are going through similar situations. But I guess I was wrong...

And that would be the wkly response after the board tells the new poster, we don't know how to help you other than to tell you to take a test or call your doctor. You didnt specifically ask for anything.... You had a "mishap" and now think you are late, but you don't know.... how are we supposed to know if you are late or when your AF should arrive??

Please refer to the Newbie Blog for general FAQs like "how long between m/c and first AF" and other general information. I also suggest giving support and posting more regularly if you want support back. To us, you are just another poster (with no disgustionable sig or reason why we should remember who you are) asking for us to tell you that you are or aren't pregnant.....

Seriously, I know I'm coming off bitchy - I don't really care, I'm sick of these posts. If you are m/c-ing or still not pregnant... stick around. We'd all love to chat and offer advice about things we have control over....

.. and to be fair, I really wasn't that bitchy and I thought everyone else was super nice compared to the usual flames that get thrown around....

bmnjd51702 · June 2011

So because that's the usual it makes it okay. I mean how can you expect any new person to get established on here if this is the norm?

Sorry I don't have time every day to come on and post, this is my first day off of work when I have been home in probably a week and a half. I introduced myself last week that I was finally coming over from the MCPL board and that I was excited to start TTC again. I really hadn't felt up to creating a unique siggy or posting POLL's for everyone to take. I was contemplating it earlier when I was reading the poll about whether you remember people or not if they don't have a unique siggy, but it shouldn't be a requirement. I'm relatively new to the site, just started participating on any boards a month ago and yeah I spent the first couple of weeks on MCPL. Maybe there should be a disclaimer at the top of this board stating "no newbie questions here, you have to have a unique siggy, and no questions until you have posted at least 50 times on other peoples posts" I understand that many of you have been here for a while and have a lot of things going on, but I don't feel like that should give anyone the right to go off on people for no reason. If you don't like the post or question don't respond. I don't feel the need to be nasty to anyone, especially people who have gone through the same pain and disappointment as we all have.

Btw...I didn't ask anyone to tell me if they thought I was pregnant or not, I said I'm pretty sure I'm not but was asking if anyone had a similar situation and/or feelings.

ECHC829 · June 2011

I'm sorry you feel that way. Again, I dont think anyone (including myself) was that mean.... I'm sorry if your feelings are hurt that you didn't receive the responses you hoped for, but you're being a little too defensive. It's an online message board. It's not a website that showers puppies and rainbows....

Genuinely, I don't think you're troll... I was just trying to let you know, this post and your "question" (still not sure what the question was exactly was) is a SUPER common goat/troll post. We get people coming over here to play with us and they post basically the same thing you did..... "doctor told us to wait, but we couldnt help ourselves, now I think I'm KU".... we don't really have any responses, especially polite ones and why would we?? Then of course, the goat (person stirring up trouble and trying to cause pain to bumpies who experienced a loss) comes on and calls us all heartless and we don't give support - you can see from a ton of posts below all the support we give. This is their idea of a good time... so whenever we see posts like this we immediately get on the offense to protect our members...

I'm sorry you got off on a bad foot and maybe weren't clear with the purpose of your post. Again, I do think you are real person looking for support and hopefully not here for a laugh at our expense. Hopefully (if thats what you want) you are pregnant and have a H&H 9months ahead, if you aren't please stick around and lurk a little longer if you feel you don't know the rules of the board. Biggest thing, please give support if you looking it for.... no one here likes the people who posts only for themselves but doesn't take the time to get to know others - and you don't have to be on 24/7 for this to happen.

GL with your HPT

bmnjd51702 · June 2011

I'm sorry if anyone thought that I was just posting that for the hell of it to stir the pot or hurt feelings because that was never my intention, and sorry if my questions weren't very clear. Yes I did get defensive because I just don't agree with the way some posts are responded too, but probably even more so because of being so hormonal (hopefully b/c AF is on her way) and being sick.

I would really prefer to wait until AF arrives before actively TTC and it wasn't that we couldn't help ourselves and decided to go at it despite what the dr. said...the condom broke (luckily in the middle not at the end) and I have been super paranoid ever since and have even been holding out...poor DH :-/ I think I am going to wait at least a few more days maybe even a week before POAS and/or calling my Dr.

Maybe my body will just settle out and AF will come and then we will be able to let the fun begin Good luck to everyone! I'm gonna work on my siggy later

corndog8 · June 2011

I don't think you were here to stir the pot, but to follow up on Ehayes pp, we do get alot of those kind of posts from "goats" and it can be hurtful to gals on here, and we do tend to be protective of each other. I don't feel the posts were all that negative or hurtful at all, just short and simple, and there were even a couple "if AF arrives, stick around and join" - sorry if they put you on the defensive. People here go through alot of emotions and it varies so sometimes you gotta go with the flow and not take it super personal.

Hopefully you will stick around if AF shows and get to know us - give and get support.

xoladiebug · June 2011

bmnjd51702:
We are planning to start TTC once I finally get my first AF after MC...still waiting though. We had a condom misshap 2 1/2 wks ago and when I used a OPK to make sure I wasn't about to O and of course it was positive. I seriously doubt that the one slip up we had will result in BFP but AF is just determined not to show up. Has anyone had a similar situation and was just to scared to test. I really don't think I am but I am just terrified to test and it be a chemical BFP just to have AF show up a few days later. I just don't know how long I should wait especially since I was super regular prior to MC.

I also interpreted your question to be about how long did it take before you got your AF after MC. As many women responded, regular before MC and regular after MC vary. I took a HPT because I felt like I was late but then got AF the very next morning. It was disappointing yes, but at least I knew things were back to normal. Before MC I had a cycle between 25 - 28 days and I got my first AF after MC 31 days later. Should be interesting to see the variations this cycle...unless of course I get a BFP ) Here's to hoping right?!

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