Cincinnati Babies

Venting...

I hate getting calls from DH in the middle of the day that DS won't do something.  Today he calls me to say that he won't pick up his train stuff.  An hour later he calls to say that DS won't eat his lunch.  WTH am I supposed to do about it?  I'm at work...even if I had a magic wand to wave, I'm pretty sure that it wouldn't work 15 miles from home.  I know that it is frustrating when your kid won't listen to you or refuses to do something, but these calls happen way too often.  Now I'm going to stew on this for the rest of the day.  

FYI...DH is disabled so he stays at home.  We send DS to a sitter part time and DH has DS two days a week all day.  Today happens to be one of those days. 

 

Re: Venting...

  • That wouldn't sit well with me. Not at all.

    Have you talked to him about your frustrations?

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  • That has to be frustrating.  I've noticed with DH that there are things really bother him where I can mostly let them slide.  Especially when it comes to crying or DD's tantrums that she has started to throw, he has a much lower threshold for tolerating it.  I don't know if it's a "man" thing or just him, but I seem to be able to let a lot of it roll off my back and just carry on where he gets really frustrated.  I'm also the primary caregiver at home so may be that has something to do with it. 

    I agree with TTT though, maybe talk to him about it and why it bothers you.  Maybe he just needs to vent and figured you would understand?

  • DH does that to me sometimes. I am not sure what he is trying to accomplish or really if he is just venting.

     What I do is just stay very calm and tell him that I have faith that he can handle it or that I know he can handle it. Then I get off the phone. It puts the ball back in his court to figure it out on his own.

  • I have talked to him about it a month or so ago, but I need to revisit our discussion.  I know that he is doing it to vent in a way, but at the same time, what can I do about it?  The other thing that really makes gets my goat is that today he put DS on the phone and asked me to talk to him about cleaning up!  At that point I would just clean the stuff up myself and take the toys away/put them away for a few hours and say, you can't play with these today because you didn't clean them up like I asked you to.  How hard is that? 

    It is comforting to know that I'm not the only one who would be frustrated by this scenario.  Thanks, ladies.

  • I stay at home during the day but I work 3 nights a week and at least once a week dh will call me and tell me that Isabelle won't do something and then when I ask to speak to her he refuses to put her on the phone! Talk about frustrating! He will eventually put her on the phone and then I talk to her and she agrees to do what she has been told.  I've told my husband if he calls and wants me to talk to her then that is fine but he is not allowed to "yell" or "punish" her in any way.  He also must agree to whatever I tell her.  I will say since I've told dh this he hasn't called me at work!
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