Toddlers: 12 - 24 Months

XP: Boys vs Girls (moms of both)

I'm expecting #2 in January and right now I have a 14 month old DS.  Growing up I always thought I'd be SOO disappointed if I didn't have a boy and a girl, but now that I have DS I honestly would not be sad at all if I was a mom of all boys.  I feel like there is nothing better than having my little man.  So my question is, especially for mom's who had a boy first and loved it, how do girls and boys differ in respect to your relationship with them?  I'm actually slightly nervous that if I have a girl I won't feel the strong bond I do with my DS, even though I'm sure I'm just being overly emotional.  Did anyone else feel this way?
Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml

Re: XP: Boys vs Girls (moms of both)

  • You are probably just feeling emotional now, but thats ok :)

    I had my boy and girl at the same time, so I don't know how much help I am but I will say that yes, my relationship is different with each but I love it that way! DS is a huge mamas boy and DD is a daddys girl. That doesn't mean that DS doesn't love his daddy and that DD doesn't love me, though! I used to be nervous about having a boy and now I am so so glad that I had one! Actually I feel so blessed and happy that I get to experience BOTH! I get to have my special little man who likes to drive his hot wheels on me and I get to have my funny little girls who like to play with dolls (well, DD1 does, DD2 just eats them). Its so fun! I wouldn't have it any other way! I think you are going to have a blast!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Abigail Noelle, 8.29.09
    Brady Phoenix, 8.29.09
    Claire Zoe, 10.26.10

  • Loading the player...
  • I can't answer this question because I will be having 2 girls but I understand where you are coming from. Before we found out the gender of DD#2 I told DH that I wasn't sure how I would be with a boy. My family is all girls and that is all we know. Well we are thinking about having LO #3 and #4 in about 4 years and I guess if one of them are a boy I will figure it out! But for now I will just have my girls which I am 100% just fine with. Honestly I would be just fine having 4 girls! I know call me crazy a lot of other people do :)
    Image and video hosting by TinyPic Lilypie Second Birthday tickers Lilypie First Birthday tickers
  • I have one of each, but we had our DD first. :) We really wanted at least one of each, but I would've been happy to have another DD, because I always wanted a sister when I was young. (DH, however, would've been scared to try for #3 had #2 been a girl, because the possibility of that many girls would terrify him. :) )

    I also worried about what to do with a boy, and how I'd possibly be able to love him as much as I love our DD. (pregnancy hormones, I tell ya, because even typing that out feels ridiculous) With our DD, I feel like I really "get" her.. really understand her, because we're both girls, and I can always relate to her, even when she is being dramatic, emotional and/or irrational. :) She's my favorite girl in the whole, wide world, and she knows it. My bond with DS is absolutely, completely, 100% different, and I LOVE that it is. He's a mommy's boy all the way--random kisses and hugs, and often--and we have the sweetest bond. (Not that DD isn't sweet also! It's just a different bond.)

    Though, go figure, as head-over-heels as I am for our DS, the idea of two boys honestly scares me, (t-r-o-u-b-l-e) whereas I'd probably be a little bit more likely to try for another if I knew it would be a girl. :)  Which sounds insane, I'm sure, and is just one of the many reasons why we're not 100% sure if we're having more. We will see.

    It will all turn out fine! Once your LO is here, you won't be able to imagine them being anything different. :)

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • When I found out I was pg with #2, I secrely hoped it was a girl, but would have been just as happy if it was a boy.  When I found out I was having a girl, instead of feeling the extreme excitement I thought I would feel, I felt a little shell shocked. I had become used to being the mom of a boy and that is all I knew, but once the news sank in a little and I began preparing for a girl, I became excited about all of the things I would be able to with a daughter.

    When she was first born, honestly there was not much difference between her and my son at that age, but now that she is a little older, our house is slowly becoming filled with both girl and boy toys and I am having a BALL shopping for shoes and hair accessories for her! My relationship with each of them is slighly different, but that is mainly because they have such different personalities, not really because they are different sexes. My bond with both of them is just as strong, but slightly different. My son is getting so big and I just fill up with emotion everyday when I see all of the things he can do and say.  I get just as emotional about my daughter because she is my last baby and I want to hold on to every precious baby moment with her.I think that would be the case even if I had two boys though.

  • When I found out #2 was a girl, I was excited about having one of each, but also nervous because I knew what it was like to be a mom of a boy.  However, it really wasn't much different... they are both very attached to me.  DD is more independent and active than her brother, but those differences (and others) I attribute more to her personality and being the second child. She is a bit more fun to shop for, though :)

    Jackson ~ 12.27.06
    Macy ~ 10.23.09
  • Thanks for all your responses!  I'm glad others had the same concerns and that everything turned out perfectly for them. I'm excited to see what we will be adding to the mix in the new year!
    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • Granted I have not been a mom of both a boy and a girl for very long... I feel a stronger bond with DD but I think that's only because of BFing.  That simply forces me to be with a her a LOT and I feel terrible about not being able to spend that much time with DS right now.  But if I'm to compare my bond with DD with my bond with DS at the same age... it's stronger with DD because I was unable to BF DS.  I feel much more connected to or "in tune with" her than I did with DS at this age... although I was very in tune with him at the time, too... but I guess BFing does something a little differently.  Sounds strange but... oh well, lol.
    My best friend, my husband, my everything
    Matthew Kevin
    7/31/83-7/20/11 image
    Met 1/8/00
    Engaged 4/21/06
    Married 9/29/07
    Two beautiful legacies: Noah Matthew (2 yrs) and Chloe Marcella (8 mos)
    Day Three
  • All my life I wanted a baby girl and when I found out there was 1 girl and 3 boys I worried I would love her more than the boys or be more bonded to her but I can honestly say that is not true.  I feel the same bond with all four of them and am so gald that I have both genders!
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Photobucket Visit our blog at www.benandkarisjourneytoparenthood.blogspot.com
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards
"
"