Bad appointment - need encouragement (long, sorry)

BaumMom · June 2011

Had a bad appointment with my OB today. First I had to wait an hour and a half to see him, so I was in a bad mood, and I heard him talking outside the room about how frustrated he was with the new electronic medical charts, so I know he wasn't in a good mood either. He wasn't rude to me or anything, I could just tell that he wasn't in a great mood.

He did an internal, I was 3 cm, 75% effaced, -2 station (last week was 3cm and 50% effaced, -3 station) but as he was checking me he said off handedly "you sure are narrow down here". He's told me I have a narrow pelvis before, and my first c/s was due to suspected CPD, so it was nothing new, but now I am just second guessing my choice to try and VBAC. I asked him if that meant I shouldn't try and he no, but its my decision. The whole thing just left me feeling really unconfident.

I REALLY want to VBAC but I really do NOT want to try and fail after a very traumatic first labor. I've also been having guilt about the way my first birth went because DS1 aspirated meconium after a very long and stressful labor and ended up in the NICU because of it, and I keep thinking if I had just given into the c/s earlier he wouldn't have had any trouble (meconium wasn't there at beginning of labor)

Anyway, it was just frustrating and I ended up driving home in tears because I am doubting my decision. Plus the fact that it seems like I'm never going to go into labor. Thanks for letting me vent ladies.

Myst2211 · June 2011

Don?t give up on your VBAC due to one appointment. Have faith in your body and what it is capable of doing. If there are any problems I am sure that your doctor or MW will alert you to the situation on not let anything get out of hand.

M

Brownie_222 · June 2011

I'm sorry your OB made that comment. I don't know why they say things like that. Not helpful! You should be going into your birth with confidence and energy. You can do this! I hope you go into labor soon. Take some deep breaths and be kind to yourself. Your body was made to do this and you won't be pregnant forever.

(I went to 41 weeks with my son and am prepared to go longer with this one. I know it's easier to say be patient when you're 20some weeks as compared to 39. I do understand the waiting game, though.)

Stay positive!

Luv4Minnesota · June 2011

Don't give up! Your pelvis changes and opens A TON during labor--just because you might seem narrow to his hand right now (and really, what can he tell?!) does not mean that you don't have room for your baby.

I do believe that rare cases of CPD do exisit, but more than that I believe that it is overdiagnosed and for the most part, our bodies will not grow babies that we can't birth. Believe in yourself and your body. You can do this!

iris427 · June 2011

I had my c/s for CPD too so I know how a comment like that can really hit home. The OB who did my c/s told me I would not be able to deliver vaginally unless I had a preemie. I am really small--I'm only 4'10" and around 90 lbs not pregnant, so I figured if anyone really had CPD it would be me. The OB I picked for my VBAC told me not to even worry about the CPD thing but he would occasionally make a comment about how small I am (like "I almost need the pediatric blood pressure cuff for you") and that always got me worrying that I wouldn't be able to have a VBAC.

In the end I had a fast and easy VBAC. My baby was even a few ounces larger than my "CPD" baby, 7 lbs 12 oz. You don't need a large pelvis to have a vaginal birth. I am living proof of that. I do think the fact that I stayed active during labor, listened to my body and pushed in an upright position instead of on my back made a difference, so you might want to try those things.

Do you know if your first baby was in a funky position like OP, asynclitic, etc.? I think a lot of CPD cases are actually due to the baby's position and not the mother's pelvis size at all. We have a lot of ladies on here, myself included, who had a c/s for an OP baby and then had a VBAC with a properly positioned baby.

nosoup4u · June 2011

iris427:
I do think the fact that I stayed active during labor, listened to my body and pushed in an upright position instead of on my back made a difference, so you might want to try those things.
Do you know if your first baby was in a funky position like OP, asynclitic, etc.? I think a lot of CPD cases are actually due to the baby's position and not the mother's pelvis size at all. We have a lot of ladies on here, myself included, who had a c/s for an OP baby and then had a VBAC with a properly positioned baby.

All this. My VBAC baby was a lot bigger than my c-section baby, who was OP. I stayed home until pushing, and I think being upright and active during labor reeeally helped it along. You can do this!

BaumMom · June 2011

Thanks so much ladies. I'm feeling much better today.

Iris, first baby was not OP, and it seems like he was pretty much perfectly positioned. The only reason I think that is because he had a hematoma on his scalp from me pushing so hard and it was on the crown of his head where it should have been, not off to the side or anything. I labored in every imaginable position last time, but he was 8 lbs 12 oz and just did not descend at all during 1.5 hours of pushing. This baby seems to be smaller which is my only hope. The only thing that makes me nervous though is she seems to be OP right now, hopefully she will turn during labor

Anyway, even though it seems like all the odds are against me, I still want to give it my best shot. Thanks for the encouragement from all. Send labor dust my way, I have a scheduled RCS next Friday, and the bigger she gets the more nervous I get

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Bad appointment - need encouragement (long, sorry)

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