Babies on the Brain

uhmmmm 36+ weeks is a little late for a baby shower, no?

Yeah.  I'm pretty sure that my mom and MIL are trying to have my baby shower planned for the weekend after labor day, which is Sept. 5th this year - I'm due 10/1. 

I'm thinking that's cutting it a little close - do I say something, or let it slide?  Have DH say something?  I love these women dearly and their hearts are in the right place, but they're both pretty clueless about most of this stuff, and in their case, two heads are not necessarily better than one.

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Re: uhmmmm 36+ weeks is a little late for a baby shower, no?

  • If they are local, just go with it. If it's a drive, I guess I'd mention in passing that after ______ date you aren't going to be traveling anymore and let them figure out that they need to either come to you or change the date.

    Unless your hubs is wanting you to wait to do any shopping until after a shower, then I'd just tell him too bad.

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  • I guess it depends.  If you have all of the necessities (car seat, crib/bassinet, etc.)  and are feeling pretty good, I don't think it's too late.  If you think that they could do it earlier and wouldn't mind, then I'd probably say something.
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  • I had to look at our invites... Ours was Nov 6th, and he was due Dec 7th.  It worked out ok for us.

     

    ETA: I had a small, local shower, and we'd already bought many of the bigger ticket basics.

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  • That would be a tad late for comfort for me, but I would just go with it. It's probably the very latest I would consider though, especially if you are planning on doing some shopping after the shower. When I have planned showers I try to do them by 34 weeks at the latest, just in case.
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  • imageHappyAardvark:

    Yeah.  I'm pretty sure that my mom and MIL are trying to have my baby shower planned for the weekend after labor day, which is Sept. 5th this year - I'm due 10/1. 

    I'm thinking that's cutting it a little close - do I say something, or let it slide?  Have DH say something?  I love these women dearly and their hearts are in the right place, but they're both pretty clueless about most of this stuff, and in their case, two heads are not necessarily better than one.

    My last shower was when I was 37 wks. It was local, but it was fine. The only thing that drove me crazy is that DH wouldn't let me buy anything until after my last shower, so we went out after the last shower and bought everything else we needed. 

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  • My family threw one for me when I was 36 weeks.  It was 5 hours away. I went and everything was kosher.
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  • I'd say something.  Mine was originally slated for today.  I was concerned about my comfort level so I spoke up and they worked out new date.  Clearly that was a wise decision.  ::pointing to siggy::


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  • imageL&R70707:
    I'd say something.  Mine was originally slated for today.  I was concerned about my comfort level so I spoke up and they worked out new date.  Clearly that was a wise decision.  ::pointing to siggy::

    Holy crap! Congrats, I hope all is well :-)

     

    Mine were at 30 weeks and 33 weeks. I said I didn't want them later than 34 weeks, and I'm glad I did. I went a week late, but I wanted to have everything ready to go well before my due date. Not only for the 'just in case' if the baby came early, but so I didn't have to do anything when I was hugely pregnant.

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  • imagejCamsquared:

    imageL&R70707:
    I'd say something.  Mine was originally slated for today.  I was concerned about my comfort level so I spoke up and they worked out new date.  Clearly that was a wise decision.  ::pointing to siggy::

    Holy crap! Congrats, I hope all is well :-)

    Thanks!  It has been a crazy week and we're still spending most of our time at the hospital since he is still in the NICU for now, but hopefully coming home tomorrow.


    imageimage
    2 years, 2 surgeries, 2 clomid fails, 2 IUIs, 1 loss, IVF #1 - 10/25/10 = BFP!, DS is now 3.5yrs!
    TTC #2 - 6/12 surgery #3, FET #1 & 1.2 = BFN, 12/2012 FET #2 = BFP! DD is 1.5 yrs!
    Surprise! 12/16/14 BFP, loss #2 12/31/14

    I can't wait for the "im getting a divorce" post in 5 years or so because your husbands were fed up with your disgusting chair asses from playing on the knot all day and getting fired 4-5 times for not doing any work. you guys are all winners!! ~ Laur929

  • Mine are at 29 and 32 weeks. My 32 week one is like 6 hours away, which is worrisome, but not too bad, it's with family.
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  • I generally lurk but I had my 'big' shower at 36 weeks and I was miserable.  I really wanted to have it around 32 weeks or so, and I wish I would have spoken up more.  I still went past 40 weeks, but having to act like I wasn't miserable was a big task at my shower.  GL!
  • It's hard to say. It works for some, not for others.

    I had my last shower 5 days before I gave birth. =o) 

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  • imageL&R70707:
    imagejCamsquared:

    imageL&R70707:
    I'd say something.  Mine was originally slated for today.  I was concerned about my comfort level so I spoke up and they worked out new date.  Clearly that was a wise decision.  ::pointing to siggy::

    Holy crap! Congrats, I hope all is well :-)

    Thanks!  It has been a crazy week and we're still spending most of our time at the hospital since he is still in the NICU for now, but hopefully coming home tomorrow.

    Well that's good news, I hope you are all home together asap.

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  • My shower wasn't until DD was 6 weeks old.  We ended up buying all our big ticket items, and got a boat load of 3-6 month size clothes.  She was the best dressed baby her first year!
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  • It's looking like my shower is going to be after the baby is born.

    Which is stressing me out,  because I've been told not to buy anything until after the shower. And I really wanted to get everything set up before-hand. I'd really rather not be trying to decorate a nursery with a newborn to take care of. Good thing his daddy is taking 3 weeks off work starting on my due date.

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  • imagelaurynfaerie:

    It's looking like my shower is going to be after the baby is born.

    Which is stressing me out,  because I've been told not to buy anything until after the shower. And I really wanted to get everything set up before-hand. I'd really rather not be trying to decorate a nursery with a newborn to take care of. Good thing his daddy is taking 3 weeks off work starting on my due date.

    I don't think that will be an option for you.  The kid can't go around sans carseat and naked

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  • Mine was at 37 weeks. It was a "surprise" (I had figured it out beforehand though) so I didn't get a vote on when it was. I would say something and ask that it be earlier.
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  • I guess I'm the minority. I mean this in the most unsnarkiest way, but the shower is a gift to you so personally, I'd just be grateful for it, whenever it is.
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  • I think the "ideal" time is around 33 weeks.  My shower was at 34 and I delivered DD at 35w4d.  Obviously, had it been at 36 weeks, it wouldn't have happened :).

    Most women go to term or even late with baby #1 so I think lots of shower planners assume that will happen.  Also, at 33 weeks you will be more comfortable than at 36 week.  Every week gets a little harder at that point.

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  • I had a shower at 37 weeks and it was fine.  I definitely wouldn't say anything to either of them.
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  • With my first son, my baby shower was the day before I had him.  He decided to come a little (a lot) early.  With Button, my work shower was held when I was 34 weeks and the family shower was held when I was 33 weeks.  It's a good thing they were then because Button was born when I was 36 weeks!
  • imageheather_09_15_07:
    I guess I'm the minority. I mean this in the most unsnarkiest way, but the shower is a gift to you so personally, I'd just be grateful for it, whenever it is.
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  • imageheather_09_15_07:
    I guess I'm the minority. I mean this in the most unsnarkiest way, but the shower is a gift to you so personally, I'd just be grateful for it, whenever it is.

     

    This.

    I had my family shower @ 28 weeks, but our families live 6 & 8 hours away & I didn't get much. It was mainly for everyone to be able to see me pregnant. I went home for that one and it was the last trip I made home. My work threw me a "shower" at 38 weeks. I use the term loosely b/c it was literally thrown together @ the last minute,they had lots of foods I couldn't eat (I had GD), many people didn't know about it more than a day or so in advance, so they admitted they didn't give me what they wanted to get b/c they didn't have time, but didn't want to NOT give me anything.

    It sucked b/c I didn't want to be a brat, but after I found out, I felt jipped & my feelings were hurt. There were two other girls due within a few weeks of me & they had a REALLY nice shower thrown for them. :(  While I was thankful for the party, I felt like everyone forgot (b/c they did), and they just threw one together.

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  • I was 35w at my shower. I was too afraid to have it any sooner in case of another loss. It was nice having it that late because then I had something to do in the middle of the night when I couldn't sleep.
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  • Thanks for your feedback, everyone.

    I definitely am not trying to be a pregzilla, and I would be happy to have any shower thrown in my honor at any stage in my pregnancy.  I think dh brought it up to me because my mom probably dropped some obtuse hint about it to him, and he could sense that it might be an issue that he should ask me about. 

     So maybe I'll have dh suggest that sometime in mid-August might be a little more ideal if the dates worked better for everyone else too, and then I'll just stay out of it.

    July 20th, 2012: Never forget the day the fb douchebags tried so hard, but ultimately failed. Viva la October 2011! Yeah, I called you douchebags.

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  • Mine was that late, because both I and my family were too gun shy to do it earlier. I still had time to return extras, get whatever we still needed, etc. And it was kind of fun to have the big belly to show off.

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