Just when you think life can't get weirder...(long)

LME06 · June 2011

It does. DH and I found out yesterday that my SIL is KU. She CALLED and told my MIL on Friday. She lives less than an hour away and could have told my in-laws in person easily. She just turned 23, isn't married, doesn't work, has been working for almost 6 years on her undergraduate degree-failing class after class, and doesn't even seem to really have a steady bf. And to make this even more interesting, she's 19 weeks pregnant. She finds out the sex of the baby Friday. She's known since she was about 5 weeks, and has been hiding it from everyone, except a few of her girlfriends, and the baby daddy. You might think, "well, this isn't so bad." I'll explain why it is. DH and I are fairly convinced she has some sort of social disorder. She carries stuffed animals around with her, and will throw temper tantrums still, toddler style. Like, laying on the floor, kicking and screaming when she doesn't get her way. On her 22nd birthday, she came in our house screaming "where is my gift?! where is it?!!" My entire family was in shock and disbelief when they met her at our wedding. She told MIL that the baby's dad is 24. DH and I did a little digging last night and turns out he's 37 Indifferent What in the world a 37 year old man is doing hanging around meeting college girls is beyond me. Get this-he says he "isn't ready to be a father yet." He must be waiting until he gets older?? My FIL doesn't know yet how old the dad is, and I am so worried he'll have a heart attack when he finds out. They still completely support her financially. Today, through text (because she won't answer our phone calls, mature-right?) she told me that she refuses to move home to have her parents help her care for the baby. She said her parents are "just too much to deal with". I can't believe how disrespectful she is to them. Yesterday, when we found out, I was so sad that she got to have the first grandchild, and she could get KU on accident, and we can't for trying our hardest, etc. Today, the shock and those jealousy feelings have left, and I'm just p!ssed at her for continuing to act like a child instead of thinking of the child she owes a decent life to...

::If you got this far, you are my hero! Thanks for letting me vent ladies!::

SheenaNash1 · June 2011

LME06:

It does. DH and I found out yesterday that my SIL is KU. She CALLED and told my MIL on Friday. She lives less than an hour away and could have told my in-laws in person easily. She just turned 23, isn't married, doesn't work, has been working for almost 6 years on her undergraduate degree-failing class after class, and doesn't even seem to really have a steady bf. And to make this even more interesting, she's 19 weeks pregnant. She finds out the sex of the baby Friday. She's known since she was about 5 weeks, and has been hiding it from everyone, except a few of her girlfriends, and the baby daddy. You might think, "well, this isn't so bad." I'll explain why it is. DH and I are fairly convinced she has some sort of social disorder. She carries stuffed animals around with her, and will throw temper tantrums still, toddler style. Like, laying on the floor, kicking and screaming when she doesn't get her way. On her 22nd birthday, she came in our house screaming "where is my gift?! where is it?!!" My entire family was in shock and disbelief when they met her at our wedding. She told MIL that the baby's dad is 24. DH and I did a little digging last night and turns out he's 37 What in the world a 37 year old man is doing hanging around meeting college girls is beyond me. Get this-he says he "isn't ready to be a father yet." He must be waiting until he gets older?? My FIL doesn't know yet how old the dad is, and I am so worried he'll have a heart attack when he finds out. They still completely support her financially. Today, through text (because she won't answer our phone calls, mature-right?) she told me that she refuses to move home to have her parents help her care for the baby. She said her parents are "just too much to deal with". I can't believe how disrespectful she is to them. Yesterday, when we found out, I was so sad that she got to have the first grandchild, and she could get KU on accident, and we can't for trying our hardest, etc. Today, the shock and those jealousy feelings have left, and I'm just p!ssed at her for continuing to act like a child instead of thinking of the child she owes a decent life to...

::If you got this far, you are my hero! Thanks for letting me vent ladies!::

First of all, I'm sorry that does sound like a totally fuccked up situation! Second, from the bolded parts, it sounds like she may seriously have a mental disorder. I'm not a doctor, but I've had students that exhibited similar behavior patterns and more often than not there was some kind of diagnosis going on there. I'd maybe have your DH have a frank talk with his parents about who is going to be responsible for checking in on this poor child to make sure his or her needs are being met. I seriously see a DSHS case being opened in the future with this one...

BlueEyedDreamer · June 2011

SheenaNash1:

First of all, I'm sorry that does sound like a totally fuccked up situation! Second, from the bolded parts, it sounds like she may seriously have a mental disorder. I'm not a doctor, but I've had students that exhibited similar behavior patterns and more often than not there was some kind of diagnosis going on there. I'd maybe have your DH have a frank talk with his parents about who is going to be responsible for checking in on this poor child to make sure his or her needs are being met. I seriously see a DSHS case being opened in the future with this one...

I could not agree more. I really hope they get her some help before that baby has to suffer the consequences. Sad I'm sorry you're having to deal with the drama, too!

retallica · June 2011

Jeez! I am sorry you have to deal with that! Sad

That sounds incredibly frustrating. Hopefully she can get her act together soon.

Bella61811 · June 2011

BlueEyedDreamer:
SheenaNash1:

First of all, I'm sorry that does sound like a totally fuccked up situation! Second, from the bolded parts, it sounds like she may seriously have a mental disorder. I'm not a doctor, but I've had students that exhibited similar behavior patterns and more often than not there was some kind of diagnosis going on there. I'd maybe have your DH have a frank talk with his parents about who is going to be responsible for checking in on this poor child to make sure his or her needs are being met. I seriously see a DSHS case being opened in the future with this one...

I could not agree more. I really hope they get her some help before that baby has to suffer the consequences. I'm sorry you're having to deal with the drama, too!

all of this! what the eff.

happilyeverafterxo · June 2011

Indifferent Oh wow...there are no words...first of all, I think that yes she needs to be seen by someone if she is carrying around stuffed animals and throwing childish tantrums. I agree with PPs, your DH needs to talk to someone, preferably his parents about your concerns!

I'm sorry that you are dealing with this...thoughts and prayers girl

Edit: Fixed word

LME06 · June 2011

SheenaNash1:
LME06:

It does. DH and I found out yesterday that my SIL is KU. She CALLED and told my MIL on Friday. She lives less than an hour away and could have told my in-laws in person easily. She just turned 23, isn't married, doesn't work, has been working for almost 6 years on her undergraduate degree-failing class after class, and doesn't even seem to really have a steady bf. And to make this even more interesting, she's 19 weeks pregnant. She finds out the sex of the baby Friday. She's known since she was about 5 weeks, and has been hiding it from everyone, except a few of her girlfriends, and the baby daddy. You might think, "well, this isn't so bad." I'll explain why it is. DH and I are fairly convinced she has some sort of social disorder. She carries stuffed animals around with her, and will throw temper tantrums still, toddler style. Like, laying on the floor, kicking and screaming when she doesn't get her way. On her 22nd birthday, she came in our house screaming "where is my gift?! where is it?!!" My entire family was in shock and disbelief when they met her at our wedding. She told MIL that the baby's dad is 24. DH and I did a little digging last night and turns out he's 37 What in the world a 37 year old man is doing hanging around meeting college girls is beyond me. Get this-he says he "isn't ready to be a father yet." He must be waiting until he gets older?? My FIL doesn't know yet how old the dad is, and I am so worried he'll have a heart attack when he finds out. They still completely support her financially. Today, through text (because she won't answer our phone calls, mature-right?) she told me that she refuses to move home to have her parents help her care for the baby. She said her parents are "just too much to deal with". I can't believe how disrespectful she is to them. Yesterday, when we found out, I was so sad that she got to have the first grandchild, and she could get KU on accident, and we can't for trying our hardest, etc. Today, the shock and those jealousy feelings have left, and I'm just p!ssed at her for continuing to act like a child instead of thinking of the child she owes a decent life to...

::If you got this far, you are my hero! Thanks for letting me vent ladies!::

First of all, I'm sorry that does sound like a totally fuccked up situation! Second, from the bolded parts, it sounds like she may seriously have a mental disorder. I'm not a doctor, but I've had students that exhibited similar behavior patterns and more often than not there was some kind of diagnosis going on there. I'd maybe have your DH have a frank talk with his parents about who is going to be responsible for checking in on this poor child to make sure his or her needs are being met. I seriously see a DSHS case being opened in the future with this one...

Thanks. I agree with everything you've said. I actually told my MIL yesterday that I'm really worried about her caring for a baby on her own and ending up with the child in CPS. She agrees with me completely. I'm hoping a real plan is developed soon.

Bizzy98 · June 2011

Sorry I am a little late to the conversation but wow what a clusterf*ck! Your SIL sounds like she needs to grow up and get her act together especially if she is going to be a mom. Has she always acted like this throwing tantrums and such or is this more of a recent thing? It sounds like her parents still support her financially and I question if maybe they are enablers to her situation? Do they just put up with her crap and ignore her behavior or do they try to do something about it? The reason I ask is because I have a similar situation with my SIL. Both my MIL and FIL are enablers to my SIL acting the way she does because they never put their foot down and let her get away with it her whole life. Last year for my MIL's birthday we were visiting and all playing cards. My SIL got mad for some stupid reason and ended up throwing a metal water bottle at her father and they didn't do anything about it. It was ridiculous! Anyways, I hope that this is not the case and I hope you SIL is able to get her act together for both her and the baby. I'm sorry you are having to deal with this and hope things get better! Left Hug

Ellis31 · June 2011

Wow how could you not be in shock, I would be. Life simply doesn't make sense sometimes, and it sucks. I'm sorry for that poor child sounds like your SIL is very capable of really messing the baby up.

It's definetely an unfortunate situation I wish you the best, and just think of it this way...you are so much better off then your SIL is right now, you are stable and happily married, I wouldn't wish what she's gotten herself into on anyone. Hope you have a better day today!

SParkman80 · June 2011

Eww. I know how you feel. I found out a couple days ago that my sister is KU with her 4th unplanned pregnancy. It stings.

Sorry you are having to go through this but as the ladies told me yesterday, at least when it's your time to have a baby, you will be ready and a great mother. For now you get to be a great Aunt. But it does sound like she needs to first face the facts of life before bringing a child into this world. Carrying around stuffed animals? Is it a cry for attention? That's odd and I've never heard of an adult doing that. I hope you start feeling better!

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Just when you think life can't get weirder...(long)

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