I know during PTing you're not supposed to scold about having accidents. However, DD has been fully PTed for 5 months. She doesn't often have an accident, and if she does, it's usually just a couple drops and she stops herself and tells me she needs to go potty. But this afternoon she all-out emptied her bladder in her undies, just because she didn't tell me she needed to go. It infuriates me because I know she recognizes the sensation of needing to go, she just got lazy and didn't feel like stopping what she was doing to do it. I firmly (but not really angrily) told her that she needs to let me know if she needs to go to the bathroom, and not to do it in her undies. I wanted to get more upset with her but didn't know if there was a line I still shouldn't cross.
So WDYD when your well-trained kid has accidents?
Re: At what point do you get upset with DC about accidents?
Do you make her clean up the mess? Maybe if she starts having to take the time to clean up the mess, she won't be lazy about it anymore. Make it a long drawn-out process to do the cleaning - maybe even make her "wash out" her undies in the sink or something. Something that makes it not fun that she might think before she goes.
I am dreading PTing! I see why you shoudln't "get" upset, so she won't have a complex about it - but it sounds very frustrating! I'm sorry!
It's not unheard of for kindergarteners to have accidents at school, so no, I do not get mad at her. She does know I'm disappointed, and that it's not something that makes mommy happy, but she's usually pretty upset about it herself without me saying anything. She also hates that her beloved Dora panties are wet (Dora's all wet! I don't want Dora to be wet!) I don't make her clean it up by herself, but she helps me.
DD didn't have a ton of accidents, but in the first year of being PTd there were probably a dozen. One week when DS was tiny she has 3 or 4 doozies (2 in very public places) and that made me want to cry because she'd been trained for almost a year. Since then, I can't really remember any that she's had while awake.
I've never been upset with A when he would have an accident; not to say I wouldn't have been frustrated because of course it would happen at the most inopportune time like when I was bfing his brother (Gosh I don't miss those days!). I can't remember the last time he had an accident, but even after I would have considered him fully potty trained there were some, We would talk about it, I would ask him why he didn't use the potty (most times I would get a shoulder shrug), explain to him he was too big to go in his pants, and then he would help me clean it up.
Honestly, Im surprised at how quickly, like age-wise, A potty trained - I don't think it is uncommon or unnatural for a three year old to still have accidents. We really are asking a lot of them to understand it all starting so young.
Avery went through a phase of doing it on purpose 5-12 times PER DAY for a few weeks. It really sent me over the edge. Once I started ignoring it and acting like it was no big deal, she stopped doing it.
For a one off accident, I think everyone else just about covered it.
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