Vent: irritated with DH — The Bump
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Vent: irritated with DH

Whenever we go anywhere together DH insists on sitting in the back with DD and I have to drive, which is fine. But he doesn't even try to keep her awake on the way home in the morning before nap.  Today she fell asleep and instead of asking me whether to wake her, he just pulled her out of the car seat and plopped her on the driveway. So of course she got upset, cried and would not go back to sleep and now the whole day is a no nap day (yes I tried again for about 40 minutes later on and she still didn't go down) which normally is not a huge deal but I'm pretty sick and tired and I need a nap. So instead DH is taking a nap (because he got up with her this am and then let me sleep a whole extra hour) and I'm sitting her with crankypants. Very very irritated.

I know I sound like a real whiner but it's just a repeated pattern of him doing whatever he wants to do without even discussing it with me. 

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Re: Vent: irritated with DH

  • I am sorry he woke her and it ruined her and your day. Have you talked to him about it? DS has lots of sleep issues and DH and I still will talk every day about how and when nap will be and such. PITA but it keeps us on the same page.
  • EmmieBEmmieB member
    Annoying!
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  • image kittylove:
    I am sorry he woke her and it ruined her and your day. Have you talked to him about it? DS has lots of sleep issues and DH and I still will talk every day about how and when nap will be and such. PITA but it keeps us on the same page.

    Well I talk and he pretends to listen and then totally disregards what I say. He has this thing that I"m too uptight about everything so he has to be passive aggressive about showing me how wrong I am and how everything will be just fine if we just relax about it. Or at least that's my perception of what he tries to do.  

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  • image amyfelice:

    image kittylove:
    I am sorry he woke her and it ruined her and your day. Have you talked to him about it? DS has lots of sleep issues and DH and I still will talk every day about how and when nap will be and such. PITA but it keeps us on the same page.

    Well I talk and he pretends to listen and then totally disregards what I say. He has this thing that I"m too uptight about everything so he has to be passive aggressive about showing me how wrong I am and how everything will be just fine if we just relax about it. Or at least that's my perception of what he tries to do.  

    Ugg. My father was like that. You would talk about something with him, come to a reasonable choice and then he would just do what he wanted. It drove me BATTY!

     I guess my only suggestion (if that is what you are looking for) would be to tell him that dispite you getting to sleep in that am since he woke her he still got to deal with her. I will admit to telling DH this once or twice when he underminded nap. Or made other choices that resulted in a moody cranky toddler.

  • EmmieBEmmieB member
    image kittylove:
    image amyfelice:

    image kittylove:
    I am sorry he woke her and it ruined her and your day. Have you talked to him about it? DS has lots of sleep issues and DH and I still will talk every day about how and when nap will be and such. PITA but it keeps us on the same page.

    Well I talk and he pretends to listen and then totally disregards what I say. He has this thing that I"m too uptight about everything so he has to be passive aggressive about showing me how wrong I am and how everything will be just fine if we just relax about it. Or at least that's my perception of what he tries to do.  

    Ugg. My father was like that. You would talk about something with him, come to a reasonable choice and then he would just do what he wanted. It drove me BATTY!

     I guess my only suggestion (if that is what you are looking for) would be to tell him that dispite you getting to sleep in that am since he woke her he still got to deal with her. I will admit to telling DH this once or twice when he underminded nap. Or made other choices that resulted in a moody cranky toddler.

    this. you woke her, you deal with her mood. that'll teach him ;-)

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  • We have a "you wake you buy" rule in this house. I would have walked her into the bedroom, plopped her down next to your hubby, jumped in the car and sat in a coffee shop...while he figured it out and I enjoyed the peace and quiet.

     

  • image scrapmama2201:

    We have a "you wake you buy" rule in this house. I would have walked her into the bedroom, plopped her down next to your hubby, jumped in the car and sat in a coffee shop...while he figured it out and I enjoyed the peace and quiet.

     

    Yup, You wake her, you take her. 

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  • I fear this is going to be me and my dh soon after baby is born. His nap time always takes precedence even when I'm sick, ugh. Hope you get some much needed sleep!
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  • It worked out. he is just so crabby if he doesn't get his sleep that I didn't really want to deal with that either. he did offer to let me sleep or whatever but I knew he would just let her sit in the crib too long so I just went and got her, let him sleep for an hour then I woke him up and we took DD to the beach in Alameda. She fell asleep in the car so we sat in the car for almost an hour while she slept and then had fun at the beach. She is resisting again right now I don't know why. 
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