Manageable?

bim38106 · May 2011

I'm just concerned about my friend.... she is a SAHM with a 3y/o and a 1y/o and just found out she's PG w/ #3, due in January. All her kids are Jan b-days, so each are exactly 2 years apart.

She watches her nephew once a week (10-12 hour day). He is 2.5. Her SIL in PG w/ #2 now. She doesn't do it for the $, though she does get paid...

A year from now, she plans on watching all five kids... that means a just turned 4y/o, 3y/o, 2y/o, a 6 month old and her own 3 month old. She says it would be just like daycare, so she can do it... except I think it'll be different since it's her own kids, her own house (baby proofed of course, but not the same as a controlled daycare setting), not to mention her own lack of sleep from having a NB....

Yesterday she called me almost in tears wondering how she was going to handle 3 of her own.... I'm just worried about her and her husband is not being very supportive about the whole thing IMO, she's taking on too much and if I were her SIL, I would tell her not to worry about it and that she would get her nanny on for an extra day or find someone else (still just 1 day/week).

Anyway, not a huge point to this post other then my concern....do you think you would watch 5 kids that age, including your own NB? Or do you think it's too much?

mabma80 · May 2011

that would be a big NO! I have two right now and pregnant with #3, due in Sept, and there is no way I would ever watch someone else's kids. DH wouldn't let me anyway, cause he knows it would be to much for me to take on.

I think you should voice your concerns to your friend. I bet she's waiting for someone to speak for her, and if you said something I bet she'd find the strength to tell her sister that it ain't gonna happen anymore. : )

JOEBunny · May 2011

If it were everyday, I would say no, but one day a week, I think would be able to handle it if she wants to.

I am sure it is a bit overwhelming, but not dangerous or horribly confining, since it is just the one day.

Stacyc625 · May 2011

Would I do it? F- No.

Would I be worried about someone else being able to manage? Nope. That is on them. If someone wants to bite more off than they can chew- that is their problem- I am not the one swallowing.

cactus5 · May 2011

Would it still be one day a week? I don't think that sounds too bad. I wouldn't love doing it each week, but if it was for family I would. I often watch my sister's three kids and it is fine. I actually enjoy it because my son loves when they are over. It keeps him entertained, and all I have to do is referee.

lilone_06 · May 2011

I think it really depends on what kind of person she is. Since it's only one day a week, I think it is manageable - so long as she doesn't mind a mess and a bit of chaos. The older kids will actually probably help entertain each other, so my biggest worry would be the two little ones. Would be tough to manage two babies, but obviously people do it (twins, etc.!).

But a PP raises a valid point - if you are concerned, maybe she is, too, and is looking for someone to talk it through with, especially if her H is not being that supportive.

bim38106 · May 2011

Thanks ladies. I knew I could always count on the voice of reason from this board I did actually express my concern to her yesterday and she is worried about it too. There is also a very demanding/large dog thrown into that mix (her SIL's, she babysits the dog as well). When she told her husband she was worried about handling it all, he basically rolled his eyes and asked her if she'd like to be called a martyr

Anyway, I know all I can do is be supportive of her, which I definitely will be. I think you're right that the older kids will entertain each other a bit...though I still think a 10-12 hr day is l.o.n.g for that! But since it is just once a week, hopefully she'll be ok. I know things might change, but for now I was thinking that those earlier weeks with the NB, I might offer to take her older DD out with my girls for the morning or something, just to help her out, if she wants it. Our older girls are BFFs

luvmagoldn · May 2011

I'm actually concerned about her DH. He sounds like an a$$.

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