34 weeks... and no income

cwyland · May 2011

We just got news today that my husband has lost his job. Worst of all, it came from one of his coworkers. His boss just cut his access to their system and wouldn't return his calls about why he couldn't check his schedule. I'm trying to stay calm, but I don't know what to do. I'm about to crawl out of my skin.

We decided when I got pregnant that I was going to stay at home. I normally work a very physical, outdoor career so I can't go back to it. And who is going to hire someone who is ready to drop a baby at any time? I know he'll do whatever it takes to keep us afloat, but I'm terrified that he won't find work.

I don't really know what kind of responses I'm looking for by posting this. I guess I just needed to tell someone, anyone, and I couldn't betray him by running to one of our friends or my mother and blow the lid for him. We only have two hundred dollars in savings right now, and I'm sitting here alone in the dark trying not to cry so hard that I give myself contractions.

justme04 · May 2011

I'm pretty sure that due to the very unprofessional way he was let go he can apply for unemployment and get it. Even if the company fights it he should be able to win this case.

I know my mom got unemployement when she was let go in an unprofessional manner.

Hallil · May 2011

It's important to keep breathing! As hard as it is worrying will not help you or LO right now, so breathe, breathe, breathe. Life throws us challenges sometimes but we all come through them fine

Best wishes that everything works out for you quickly!

Jessynlove · May 2011

have him file for unemployment asap..... did he do something he shouldnt have? if not then he qualifys . good luck

Jake Ian's Mommy · May 2011

justme04:
I'm pretty sure that due to the very unprofessional way he was let go he can apply for unemployment and get it. Even if the company fights it he should be able to win this case.

I know my mom got unemployement when she was let go in an unprofessional manner.

This.

ccorso · May 2011

My husband has basically been out of work since the middle of December. He has only been working odd jobs/hours and we have barely been making it with my income. Thank God for my parents who have been helping us out, but that is mainly because we took on my 19- year old niece in August.

I posted a similar post about 2 weeks ago. All I can say is hang in there. Trust in God, or whatever you believe in. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers. File for unemployment, look into government help for insurance and such. Things will turn around.

eternallyelegant · May 2011

Sorry for what you're going through, I pray you guys make it through, in the mean time though like PPs said, see if he can get unemployment to hold you guys until a job comes along, also try to see if you can get government assistance temporarily for things like medical and food.

cwyland · May 2011

Jessynlove:
have him file for unemployment asap..... did he do something he shouldnt have? if not then he qualifys . good luck

The only explanations that have made their way to us was that he wasn't doing well enough... and was doing too well. His boss talked to him the other day that he wanted him to speed up on learning a new skill they had assigned to him and that if he didn't show progress they would have to do something about it. When his friend told him about it tonight, she said he apparently was "stealing the show" and doing to much too well and the others were upset and wanted him gone. Neither one makes any sense, and he was scheduled to work tomorrow straight through Sunday. His boss still hasn't returned his calls and has not told him directly that he's fired. Are they expecting him to show up tomorrow so they can tell him off? Or did they figure one of the other crew would tell him so they don't have to deal with it? The place also illegally classifies them as 1099 workers, and the boss has stated previously that he does this so that they have no claims on him for harassment problems or unemployment.

I'm really trying to stay calm, but I've already been having problems over the weekend with dizzy spells and a pounding heart. I'm seeing my midwife in the morning so I was trying to put off calling her and being a worry wart. Now I feel like I'm going to throw up and faint. I really wanted to just beg him to stay home with me, but he was so upset I had to let him go see a friend and have a beer to calm down.

fraservalleybride · May 2011

Im so sorry this has happened!

If ever need an ear! msg me anytime! i check in daily!

megan_gardner_10 · May 2011

I'm really sorry...that's so stressful...especially with your little one coming so soon. From what you've said about his job though it really sounds pretty shady. Your husband definitely needs to get in touch with the edd office asap. There are so many things that an employer has to do to let somebody go legitimately. It definitely doesn't sound like they did. Also, get in touch with the office in charge of employment laws. I can't remember the name of the office but the number is posted at my job and they're job is to make sure none of your rights as an employee are violated. It sounds like you might want to get in touch with somebody there too. I'll check the posting next time I go into work and get the number of the place. Mainly keep your head up...it will be ok. Stay strong!

nsturm85 · May 2011

Try to remember that money is needed for the LO but its truly love that will get you through. I recall my dad being in a similar situation when I was just a tot ... he worked 4 jobs and went to school full time to keep our family fed and housed but all I recall is his love, and him still being my hero!

stay calm and just remember LO only needs to love and a place to sleep at night and your body gives you everything else for it!

ArcadianDreams · May 2011

Popping in from 2nd tri and saw your post..

I'm actually surprised no one else has mentioned this, but most places of employment have procedures to follow when employees are let go. If your husband was truly never sat down and officially released, or put on an improvement plan or given official warnings, and all that happened was someone took him off the system, he may have had his rights to due process violated. I would get ahold of his employee handbook or speak to someone in HR (or a coworker who get access the handbook at least) because wrongful termination is *not* something you should just roll over and accept. Even though most states are at-will, there are still legal obligations.

eta - After re-reading your reply, at least have him go in and make sure he is actually fired first.

amyc78741 · May 2011

Make a complaint with your state's workforce commission. They will investigate it and decide if he was wrongfully terminated even if he was 1099. Update his resume and start looking for a job. There a still lots of jobs out there. Temp agencies are a good place to get temp to hire work. Just some suggestions. Don't stress- everything will work out fine. Trust God and I will say a prayer for you!

WhatJustHappened · May 2011

I was going to say the same exact thing as ArcadianDreams - make sure he shows up to work. If he has not gotten a formal communication from his boss then, technically, he has not been fired. You don't want them to have a single thing that they can go back on.

an.watts · May 2011

I kinda know how you feel right now. I am 33 weeks and was just let go of my job due to budget cuts. My husband has a job but it doesn't pay very much. My job was the highest income and we were barely paying bills with both paychecks let alone with one paycheck now that more than half of what we used to make. I have been putting in for jobs but I don't see myself getting hired unless I am desperately needed. Hope everything works out..and know your not the only one going through a tough financial time.

legaleagles · May 2011

cwyland:
Jessynlove:
have him file for unemployment asap..... did he do something he shouldnt have? if not then he qualifys . good luck

The only explanations that have made their way to us was that he wasn't doing well enough... and was doing too well. His boss talked to him the other day that he wanted him to speed up on learning a new skill they had assigned to him and that if he didn't show progress they would have to do something about it. When his friend told him about it tonight, she said he apparently was "stealing the show" and doing to much too well and the others were upset and wanted him gone. Neither one makes any sense, and he was scheduled to work tomorrow straight through Sunday. His boss still hasn't returned his calls and has not told him directly that he's fired. Are they expecting him to show up tomorrow so they can tell him off? Or did they figure one of the other crew would tell him so they don't have to deal with it? The place also illegally classifies them as 1099 workers, and the boss has stated previously that he does this so that they have no claims on him for harassment problems or unemployment.

I'm really trying to stay calm, but I've already been having problems over the weekend with dizzy spells and a pounding heart. I'm seeing my midwife in the morning so I was trying to put off calling her and being a worry wart. Now I feel like I'm going to throw up and faint. I really wanted to just beg him to stay home with me, but he was so upset I had to let him go see a friend and have a beer to calm down.

I don't know what state you're in, but in CA if you have been working as a contractor (or get a 1099) but don't have all the freedom of a contractor (there is a "test" in CA) then he can still get unemployment and the Employment Development Department can collect from the employer. It might be worth looking into. Look to see if there is some kind of workers rights clinic in your town (either through a legal services agency or law school clinic). You can also call your state's bar association to get information or a referral to an employment law attorney who could likely give you some free brief legal advice.

missjulierenee · May 2011

Lurking from 1st tri

I work in HR and I agree this is not the way to terminate an employee. Right now the Department of Labor is cracking down hard on employers who misclassify 1099 workers. They are hitting these companies hard. This is an initiative the Obama Administrative set forth for the Department of Labor this past year. I have sat in on several seminars discussing this topic and to ensure we classify employee appropriately.

If the company has an HR department, I would advise him to speak to him. He needs to show up to work because not showing up they could say he was terminated for being absent. If they say he is fired, I would report this to the Department of Labor, Workforce Commission and possibly the EEOC.

I hate it when companies mistreat their employees. This is why the government has to get involved to create more laws, which causes more work on the good companies. If all companies would treat their employees fairly, it would be a better world.

GL!!

tdeddington · May 2011

I would speak with your OB as well & ask if you can get a Social Work referral---many times they can at least get you some type of assistance short term (financial, job placement, legal, etc). I know that this has to be so stressful! Good luck!

Tikat · May 2011

Sorry! This sucks! My husband was laid of in Jan 2008 (AIG Subcontractor) right after we found out we're pregnant and it took a long time for him to find a job that pays enough to pay for daycare...Life does go on however!

Are you still working now - or are you already staying home?

Also- the way your husband was laid off has nothing to do with his eligibility for unemployment - the simple fact that he was let go will have him qualify - so make sure he applies ASAP!

As you're pregnant you qualify as 2 people and can get food stamps and assistance through WIC. If you choose to nurse you will also continue getting an allowance for fresh fruit for yourself for the first year of the babies life.

I invested some money on ebay into Cloth Diaper Covers (Kawaii Baby can be had for $4/ piece - and inserts can be had for about $2/ piece. You'd need about 12-18 Diapers - but they will last you ALL THE WAY!

Check this listing:https://cgi.ebay.com/2-Dozen-Chinese-Prefolds-4-Covers-2-Nappy-FastenersFREE-/220775414669?pt=LH_DefaultDomain_0&hash=item33673d7b8d

Depending on where you live make sure you get the COBRA Healthinsurance Coverage from his former employer so your delivery is covered! If you're under 26 - see if your parents can put you back on their plan.

If you have any credit card balances start calling your credit card companies NOW to let them know about the situation - or if you still can -sign up for their protection programs ASAP!

Overall - just relax and know it will get better! It has to! In the meantime make sure you find a way to pay for the 2 most important things - a roof over your head and a mode of transportation for DH to get to work!

EDIT: I just read back to your answer - and he probably didn't have insurance through that scumbag employer to begin with...I second going from Temp Agency to Temp Agency!

cwyland · May 2011

Thank you to everyone for the advice and thoughts. My mood is much better today, but his has deteriorated. We were up extremely late because we were both so upset. This morning, I had to drag him out of bed for the midwife appointment. He went from his blaming himself phase to his take it out on the wife phase. That was fun. He spoke two words the entire time we were at the MW. He then noted that I had dragged him out of bed for "nothing" when he is the one that wanted to start coming to all my appointments. He then turned to the "poor me" phase and tried to talk his way out of going down to see the boss today.

I'm glad I didn't let him talk his way out of that one. The owner of the business had no clue he was fired. Apparently, his boss told every employee that he was fired, cut him out of the system and then didn't inform either him or the owner. Unfortunately, this doesn't fix him being fired as it is a performance job where he works in a tight knit entertainment group run by the guy that did this to him. There's no way he can get back into that dynamic after this has happened. He would just be holding on for dear life as this guy tried to find some other way to drive him out.

He was also having some problems leading up to this with one of the coworkers, one who is a favorite. So I can't help but think it has a lot to do with it. Basically, it boils down to the guy referring to him by the N word and sending him a pornographic text message suggesting that our bi-racial baby shouldn't see the light of day. As much as he loved the job and loved performing, there's just no way any of this is reversible at this point.

Luckily, he seems to have passed into the next phase, determination. He's downtown right now looking for another job door to door. Luckily, he's an entertainer and this is a tourist town in Florida right at the beginning of the high season. He insists he isn't coming home tonight until he finds something. In the mean time, I went to see my mentor today and he's going to put out feelers for me for an office or laboratory job where I don't have to go out in the heat and dig to earn my share.

Again, thanks to all of you who have given legal and financial advice. It definitely will not go unheeded. Thanks again to everyone for your kind posts.

Oh, and Tikat, we are already cloth diapering, thank God!

Shelleybell · May 2011

justme04:

I'm pretty sure that due to the very unprofessional way he was let go he can apply for unemployment and get it. Even if the company fights it he should be able to win this case.

I know my mom got unemployement when she was let go in an unprofessional manner.

This- get on the horn with your state unemployment agency asap.

Mrs. Stew · May 2011

Oh sweetie, I'm so sorry. My DH unexpectedly got let go 2 weeks ago, so I definitely feel for you. I was planning on being a SAHM...now it's all up in the air.

The other girls have given you really good advice: look into unemployment and your local DHS office for help. DHS can help with pregnancy Medicaid and food stamps. Also look into WIC...they can provide you with vouchers for fresh food.

You are not alone...please feel free to PM me if you want to chat. Best of luck to you and YH!

crzygirl · May 2011

I had a problem with a job about 10 years ago and contacted an attorney. He only asked for $300 and was able to arrange for me to be paid for 9 months upon my resignation. Contact an attorney! They can be a life saver.

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34 weeks... and no income

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