January 2012 Moms

still need to tell (kinda long)

my grandmother. We want to wait til we're a little farther but I'm not sure how to go about it.

A little history: My grandma is the ruler of all lol. She thinks shes the boss and she never likes the way anybody does anything. You would think the woman who got married at 15 and gave birth at 16 would be elated to have great grandchildren, but think again. She was upset with me that I had decided to pay for my own wedding (says its not my place) and I've faught with her about it since I started planning my wedding a year ago. She told FI and I that babies were unecesary until I was atleast 30 and reminds us everytime the word baby comes up. She wants me to be a big succesful career woman. I don't want that. I have a good job and I want to be a wife/mom not a career woman. ANYWAY!!!

Long story short she is going to flip.

 I know she will say something hurtful like mean b/c thats just how she is, but I guess I need to know WWYD?? how would you put it out there. I can't hide this forever, and I don't know what I'm going to do when she comes back with a very rude upsetting comment.

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Re: still need to tell (kinda long)

  • km0022km0022 member

    maybe she wants you to live the life she never had.

    She got married at 15 and had children at 16.  You are ready and feel that you are at the right point in your life to get married, but she has an objection (its about  money, and not age but she has an objection.)  She had children right away and she might feel that you need to "live" a little more until you are "tied down."  Maybe she just doesn't want you to walk down the same path she did and this is her way of verbalizing it to you.  Maybe deep down, she wishes she was a career woman instead of a SAHM.  Just thoughts.....ok...to your questions....Say that you 2 are having a baby and you are over the moon, and prepared, mentally, physically, etc.  And that it can't be undone so you hope you have her support.  Ok, that is just some thoughts. 



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  • thanks so much, i guess the best thing is to just SAY IT...lol I thought about the "life she never had" scenario and you may be right. I just wish instead of trying to turn me into something she would just be satisfied with the other 3 grandaughters that I get compared to all the time. lol but thanks again I will probably take your advice and just put it out there lol (when I get the {you know} to do it) 
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  • I think since you know that she might react in a less than desirable manner, you better prepare yourself for that reaction. I have a family member who's reaction will go either way and I am just resigned to accepting whatever decides to come out of their mouth and moving along. Best of luck to you when you decide to tell her the news.
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  • Is she religious at all? You could always get a card saying something like   god has decided to bless us with a child. :-)

    GL!

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