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Washington Babies
Anyone speak guy?
Last night DH and I got into it. I've been a veritable single parent since hockey playoffs began, which I am generally fine with... as long as I get some recognition for the extra work and maybe an hour to myself on the off nights.
So last night he's once again gone, and Isaac has a HORRIBLE bed time. I finally walk out after getting him down, absolutely exhausted and frustrated, and find DH home. I start to clean up, and ask him while he's piled the mail up instead of throwing it in the recycling bin (2 feet away), and I get a snarky comment in response. I lost it. I told him I didn't mind the extra work, but I did expect some courtesy in return. I told him, "I thank you for every little thing you do around this house, and you don't recognize the mountains I do." He replied, "I don't ask you for thanks!" and I shot back, "You don't have to!" He stormed off, I slept on the couch... you get the picture.
This morning he takes Isaac, lets me sleep in until 8:00am, makes a big fancy breakfast, cleans up after us. Then, the whole day was around what I wanted to do. So... what does this mean? Is this an apology? A "look at me and all I do for you?" A pre-emptive response to "oh sh!t, I'm going out with the guys again tonight and she'll be pissed" (he's out with them now)? I really don't want to ask and risk reopening it. So... anyone have a translation?
The kicker is he still hasn't said a simple "thank you," which is all I was looking for.
I'm going to make an AWESOME big brother.
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Anyone speak guy?
Weird... Interesting creatures, aren't they? Thanks, ladies!
I'm going to make an AWESOME big brother.
Yep, ITA! Guy talk is very interesting.
this
sounds like your love language is verbal and his is actions. (or whatever the "official" descriptions are)
I'm going to make an AWESOME big brother.
My H said pretty much the same thing. However, he warned that "men are stupid" and this situation will probably re-occur multiple times until he remembers to thank you in advance. (We know this from personal experience...and are still working on it!) Hope you enjoyed your apology day!
my DH said he probably felt guilty about last night so he's making up for it.
Good luck. I agree with Theresa - you should read the book the Five Love Languages... or at least skim it.... And your DH should too... It's sort of corny but it makes a lot of sense....
Its sounds like he sort of said Thank You or Sorry or Please Don't Divorce Me in his own way.
If you still want more you could start with something positive and then ask for what you want: "Thanks for making breakfast this morning. That was sweet. I just want to feel appreciated sometimes..." and go from there.
This.is.awesome!
I hope your day and weekend got much better, Zista. My Hubs pulls the same sort of crap and then apologizes in the same way sometimes. He used to do this ish more regularly, but after almost 11 years of being together, I think that he is finally figuring out that "sorry" and "thank you" work wonders and are less work than fancy, over the top gestures.
The only Easter Bunny I can get behind.
Maxwell Joseph 4/09 Lucy Violet 10/12
The rest of my weekend was awesome, thanks.
Sarah... ITA... and somehow it's universal guy for "congratulations!" and "happy mother's day!" and "happy birthday!" too. One trick ponies...
KNemo, I'd really like the "sorry," ,"thank you," AND the over the top gestures if that's an option.
I'm going to make an AWESOME big brother.