Eco-Friendly Family

Can you ladies help my friend with some newborn advice?

She sent out this message on FB.  I'm sending her my thoughts, but I thought maybe you all would have some good ideas too.  Her daughter was born full term (a week late really), but was only just under 5 llbs and had a few health problems, none of which I believe were internal.

"Hi Mommies- I was trying to think of who on Facebook have recently had babies so I could solicit your advice about what is normal re: sleep (normal being a loose term). So our daughter *** is constantly awake during the day and I'm kind of concerned that she isn't sleeping the amount a baby should. I read that newborns should sleep a lot. Well, she's practically 2 months old and for example, she only slept 2 hours all day today, one nap in the morning (she's always been like this but it's gotten worse the last 2 weeks). I can spend forever trying to get her to sleep (and I've tried all the techniques like putting her down when she shows tired signs, swaddling her, soothing her to sleep, making sure she's not overstimulated, going for a walk, etc, she has plenty of opportunity to fall asleep on her own in addition to me trying to put her down) and I succeed sometimes... but is it normal for such a young baby to go practically ALL day without sleeping? Maybe a 10 minute catnap, then waking up (waking up crying might I say, almost all of the time) It just doesn't seem healthy to me. If she's just high energy, I can deal with that. But I want to make sure I'm not damaging her well-being :) (first time mommy fears). When I read that newborns should spend most of their day sleeping, I'm thinking 'there's no way- she did that maybe the first week.' She sleeps OK at night BTW it's mostly the day I worry about.

Also, this is a whole other bag but I'm trying to nurse her when she acts hungry but she still wants to eat ALL the time, like every 1-1.5 hours (at 7 weeks) and I'm wondering if that's normal and/or ever going to change?

Any other Mommy advice would be greatly appreciated, ha ha. **** is quite a handful and I lack experience in the newborn area :)" 

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Re: Can you ladies help my friend with some newborn advice?

  • That sounds a lot like my DS.  Do you know if her DD vomits a lot?  I didn't realize that DS' vomiting was as bad as it was until someone told me that it was an excessive amount of spit up.  Or, when she wakes up is she screaming like she's in pain?  It was reflux for us, and it was it's worst right around his 2 month mark.  Personally, I would have her talk to her pedi about reflux.  The best thing I did was medicate him for it.  He has never been a good sleeper, but the zantac really helped him sleep better.  And once he started keeping some of his food down, he didn't nurse quite as often.
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  • miababymiababy member
    Thanks, I actually mentioned the possibility of reflux to her.  DD had it too when she was tiny.  I also mentioned that if baby is nursing very quickly (not sure if she is), she might not be getting hindmilk and might just be hungry.
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  • My child didn't sleep at all when he was tiny... and then, ONLY in our arms..
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  • S barely slept at all when she was tiny.  My best advice is, if she's happy, it's fine.  If she's cranky & miserable, then you should try to play with her sleep schedule a bit.
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  • Julia was never a great napper. The only way she would sleep was if we held her, the moment we laid her down she would wake. Does she have a sling or wrap? It might save her sanity if she had one, that way she could wear the baby while doing chores or walking around the yard. Julia loved being wrapped up in my chest and she would sleep there peacefully. The frequent nursing sessions is totally normal IMO. I wonder how many hours she is sleeping at night? My kids were only sleeping 3-4 hour stretches at 2 months. Both of my babies were tiny but full term ( 4#14, and 5#5) so I don't thunk that has anything to do with it.
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  • Mari doesn't just fight naps, she's a little ninja warrior against them. My mom says it's karma, and DD is twice the size I was as a baby, so I don't think it's a size thing. Some of us just can't/don't nap for beans.

    Wearing her does help. The swing was a frigging godsend until she outgrew it. 

     I'm not sure I have anything to contribute about the nursing. It sounds like a normal frequency to me, but we're still dealing with eating every 1.5-3 hours around the clock so I'm headed to a LC to talk about hidden tongue tie, so I'm not a good gauge of normal. But I do hope that she's able to get some rest and some help herself!

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  • That sounds a lot like my DS. He slept all the time for the first week then not at all. He was down to 1 nap a day by 9-10 months. He still doesn't sleep a whole lot.

    This may or may not apply to her but DS had undiagnosed reflux as a newborn. We didn't find out until he was 7 months old. He always woke up crying and he never slept for very long though nights were better than days. He had silent reflux so he never spit up.

    An hour and a half between nursing sessions doesn't sound too abnormal for a not quite 2 month old baby. DS still eats very frequently! But again, it could be a sign of reflux.

    Give her some mommy hugs! She loves her baby. She's not going to harm her being. She's obviously thinking wisely and making sure she's on the right track.

  • I wish I had some brilliant miracle advice for her, but I have no idea.  My son is the same way at 8 weeks old.  He'd been napping much better, but starting about 10 days-2 weeks ago, he really started fighting daytime naps.  45 minutes is the longest I ever get, unless he's being rocked by Dad, then he might sleep for 90 minutes, but as soon as dad stops rocking, he wakes up.  Same thing with falling asleep at night - takes FOREVER.  I'm so convinced it's because he's overtired, because I know they aren't supposed to be awake for 4-5 hrs at a time, but sometimes he is!  Once he falls asleep at night he sleeps normal - 4 to 5 hours, sometimes more.  I'm trying to figure out if he's getting reflux or what the heck.  Someone mentioned the 8 week wonder week - as being a big developmental phase, so I'm wondering if that has some role in it.  My older DS always had sleep troubles when he was going through those developmental phases. 

    And yeah... because he doesn't nap for long stretches in the daytime, he nurses A LOT.  Usually every 2 hrs, sometimes more often.  I try to do a eat, play, sleep routine, but if he skips the sleep part, then yeah... I go back to feeding him in less than 2 hrs and *hope* that maybe he'll fall asleep when he's nursing.  Which, sometimes he does, but then he usually wakes up 10 minutes later.  

    So... yeah... I'm not a lot of help, but tell her she's not alone and just to hang in there!  My older DS took 45 minute naps for his first 5 months and what eventually helped, was just rocking him back to sleep and putting him down again - kind of training him to be able to wake up (but not all the way) and fall back asleep and get his body used to sleeping for longer periods.  Within a week of that, he was taking 2+ hr long naps.  Not sure it would work on a smaller baby, but I'm sure giving it a shot!

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  • kar5162kar5162 member
    The amount of eating doesn't sound abnormal, but the amount of sleeping does.  I'd suggest looking into reflux like the PPs.  The other things I'd suggest is the sling/Moby/Ergo since at that age, DS wouldn't sleep anywhere besides in my arms or on me.  Also, she said she tries putting the baby down when it shows sleepy signs.  That never worked for us - by the time he acted sleepy, he was overtired.  If I put him down in the swing or into the Moby or Ergo for a walk ~5-15 minutes before he started to usually look sleepy, he'd generally fall asleep really quickly.  He didn't start really regularly napping until 6-7 months though.
  • aspadeaspade member

    If her baby is more alert than usual, it might be really easy to get overstimulated.  I too suggest babywearing--she needs a Moby!  DD was very alert and we too had trouble with her napping early on.  The NCSS was really helpful in helping me recognize her patterns.

    The eating is totally normal and of course related to the short or no naps.  In fact, kudos that she's recognizing the cues so well!  With a baby that small (as in the under 5 birth weight), there's a lot of making up to do and lots of weight gain in the early months.  She may have just experienced the 6-week growth spurt and clusterfeeding (is it mostly in the late afternoon/early evening?).  I'd remind her about the growth spurts and developmental milestone sleep connection.

    There is a possibility with the reflux.  She could try feeding the baby at a 30 to 40 degree angle and getting the LO to sleep on the left side and see if any of that helps.

    And here's hoping she doesn't get any truly horrible facebook advice...  

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  • The sleep things sounds challenging. We had similar issues when DS was tiny. He wouldnt sleep for more than 45 minutes at a time and maybe 2-3 hours a day. BUT he was sleeping very well at night at around 6 weeks.

    My lactation consultant said that EBF babies dont necessarily stretch out the times between feedings as they get older but they get more efficient and the nursing sessions get shorter. Ask her how long it takes her LO to nurse and if its 10 minutes or less it could just be that she is very efficient at nursing and she is digesting the milk very well too.

     

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  • miababymiababy member
    Thanks ladies!  I talked to her today and reassured her that all her questions were totally normal.  After talking, she sounds like she has some issues with overactive letdown and the baby isn't getting any hindmilk.  She's going to seek out a LC for help.  I also suggested that she try wearing her in the moby more often.  I know she feels better that lots of other moms have the same issues!
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