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September 2011 Moms
Long rant. You will think I'm ungrateful.
I will begin this post by saying that I know some of you will think I'm a total snot for saying this. 
Flame me if you must. I hope you can see beyond all that to get me some much needed advice.
My grandmother is not a rich woman. She is, however, a gifter. Its all she lives for. When the wife of one of her employees got pregnant, she bought 4 large boxes of clothes and shippped it to her. NB-24mo. Oh and thats just the clothes. Don't forget books and toys too. Its crazy. She's crazy. So you can imagine that if she "gifts" a near stranger with all that, she goes a little overboard with her first great-grand.
When news of my pregnancy was given, we(my mom and sis helped) all intructed her not to buy ANYTHING. If she felt the need to contibute, she could purchase diapers only. Then, she started buying me maternity clothes (some of it is helpful, but a large amount doesn't fit and isn't returnable) I would much rather have a savings account set up for LO with all the money she is pouring into this crap a don't want.
Now that I know the gender, it is much much worse. How can I get her to stop shoppping for me? My mother tells her all the time that I don't need any more clothes but my g-ma sees her daughter as a frugal and unhappy woman so it goes in one ear and out the other.
My mom hit the nail on the head with how I feel when she said "Shopping for your own baby clothes is part of how you nest and bond. Its a joy to pick out things for your own baby. Its a burden to have too much given too you, especially if it isn't stuff you want or like enough to use." How can I get my grandmother to understand this without making her feel unappreciated??
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Re: Long rant. You will think I'm ungrateful.
I really want to offer you a thoughtful reply but all I can think of is how I wish I was in your position!
I have been in your position before and accepted many gifts I neither wanted nor needed - but doing it in the most gracious and thankful way is really the only option I see. Like MrsMichelle said, you can always donate them to people who are less fortunate than you!
IMO you can't stop gifts however, if it bothers you that much maybe you can set aside your own money into a savings account for baby. I mean if you were going to spend a certain amount on clothes and g-ma already over spent and you don't feel like you need anymore you could set that amount aside for baby's account.
Babies are expensive and they go through ALOT of clothes on a daily basis. Between blow outs, spit up and peeing while trying to change diaper, you will go through alot of clothes. At newborn-toddler age, I don't feel there would be any clothes that you don't like or couldn't put on baby at home at least, I mean it's harder to shop for my 13 yr old than it is to shop for this baby who has no say or opinion either way.
From what you said it is obbvious that g-ma isn't going to listen so there really isn't any way to stop her and it seems like it's more of good intention than trying to control or take over.
It sounds to me that your grandmother isn't so much into GIVING as she is into SHOPPING (otherwise she would perhaps have listened to you that you prefer a savings account, and otherwise she probably wouldn't send such lavish gifts to acquaintances, which would certainly make me feel awkward).
Can you schedule a time to go shopping *with* Grandma and maybe pick out some items together that you both like? Or send your mom (if she has a good idea of what your taste is).
Remember, you can always sell unwanted gifts on ebay or craigslist or Once Upon a Child and put that money into a savings account. There is a pretty thriving market for kids stuff, especially new with tags. Keep a few items to wear when Grandma is visiting and get rid of the rest. No one needs to know but you.
I know it's not what you want to hear but I don't think you're going to be able to stop your Grandmother if this is what she wants to do.
I would accept her generosity and say nothing but thanks.
I haven't bought a single baby clothes item. The soon to be grandparents, esp. my mom, has bought a lot of the clothes. I have no issue with this. The grandparents have bought the majority of the nursery furniture, and then my mom went and bought a nice mattress and crib sheets. I am truly thankful for her generosity. She is over the moon about having a grandchild.
I don't think buying baby clothes is a way of bonding with the baby, but if you feel that way, then buy stuff. Don't worry that your gma bought so much...if you don't use it, donate it to someone who needs it.
I can't let my G-ma continue spending her money and turn around and donate it. She seriously does NOT have the money to do this. IMHO, she has a shopping addiction but because she shops for other people, its looked at as being generous. It isn't. She has a problem. Seriously.
Also this wasn't mentioned in my OP, tons of the stuff she is buying is for toddlers and I simply don't have the storage space in my TINY appartment for it. Many of the items are not useful because she isn't thinkging about how old the baby will be and what the weather will be at that stage. I feel that if I redirect her to shop for stuff I like and will use, it will only encourage her to spend increasing amounts of money. Which she doesn't have. But she'll "charge it" anyway.
It makes her happy but it makes her BROKE. This is my issue with the whole situation. I don't want or need the clothes. She doesn't need the added expense. I feel like a need an interventionist.
Further info: My G-ma lives in town so I can't just "save a few items for her to see while visiting" as one poster suggesting. I seriously doubt she'd even recognize what she bought anyway, there is that much volume.
Also, she has stopped giving christmas gifts to anyone the past two years because of financial trouble.
I am not really asking if I should let her gift to me or not. I really asking how to get her to stop.
If you really want her to stop and feel this is a part of a larger problem, then it is probably best to be direct and know feelings will be hurt. Tell her, "Grandma, Thank you for all the clothes, but it is really too much. I am at the point that I will be donating items that I cannot use and I will no longer be accepting more clothing for the baby. If you would like to give the baby a gift then please do XYZ."
Oops, for some reason I read your OP as she IS a rich woman instead of she IS NOT a rich woman! So I understand if you're worried about her spending all of her money but it sounds like this is her personality and something she has done forever. I'm not sure you'll be able to change her at this point... sorry I don't have any further suggestions...
I would advise you to have a conversation with her, but it doesn't seem like it will help. She is stuck in her ways at this point.
How about consigning the clothes, or selling them on ebay or craigslist? Then you can put THAT money into items you actually need or into a savings account. Sure you will both be taking a loss, but it's either that or you having an eight year supply of toddler clothes!
I think I understand where you are coming from here. Allow me to air my dirty laundry in support...My FIL struggles financially and is what you could classify as a hoarder. He also compulsively shops, and buys things simply because he "had a coupon", "it was a good deal", etc. He's a single man, but will buy 18 jars of spaghetti sauce, or 5 lbs of sugar, for example, at Costco because it was a good deal. As a result, he has ended up with dozens of trash bags full of unworn clothes that occupy an entire bedroom, and every surface in his tiny apartment is covered in food supplies that could feed all of the homeless in Philadelphia.
He's now moved on to buying things for our LO. Just the other day, he came home with a bag full of onsies/rompers from TJ Maxx (one of his favorite places to find "deals") for 24 month-olds. My DH tried to gently tell him that while we appreciate his good intentions, we don't even know if our son will fit into these clothes in the right season to wear them, and he should save his money....FIL got offended and defensive. We feel bad, too, because like your grandmother, he doesn't have the money, but as you said about your grandmother - he has a problem. They have good intentions and I know what you mean about trying not to seem ungrateful, but I believe it's psychological and there's really nothing you're going to do to stop it. So, you might as well accept it. It fills some kind of void for them that I don't fully understand. But I hope it helps to hear that you're not alone in feeling like this.