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Multiples
Doing twin stuff alone
Just a thought before I head to sleep.
I always find it interesting when I see moms on here scared to go out alone, or doing something alone with their babies for the first time and they are like 6 months old. MH and I both work FT. His job has him gone a lot of evenings in season, and for 2-4 night stretches at a time. Once in awhile my mom will come in town, but since week 2 I have done feeding, bedtime, baths, night duty, AM duty, daycare drop off... by myself a lot. Having summer babies I have taken them to the grocery and target all of the time alone. I guess I don't want to just sit at home, so I just tried it out and did my best.
I am not writing this to offend anyone or say I am so great, I just want new MoMs to not be scared, or to be cooped up at home all the time. MH helps a ton when he is home and I am so happy about that. I can't imagine how hard it must be for military wives not having that help or relief for huge chunks of time. They are some tough women.
Anyway, thoughts? Do you all do a lot alone? Does it get harder or easier as the babies get older?
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Re: Doing twin stuff alone
My DH is out of town a lot for work, so I am alone a good deal.
My babies sleep 12 hours a night, so nighttimes are heaven. However, I am more nervous about taking all 3 kiddos out alone, simply due to the fact that I am totally outnumbered. Going to the grocery store with the babies??? Cake. Going to the grocery store with the babies and DD? Scary!
When the weather is nice, we walk in the Valco (with toddler seat), but we can only pick up a few items at the store. I have yet to have a LONG shopping trip in Target with all 3!!!
Obviously now I do everything by myself (not for much longer thank God because I am SO tired! LOL). Even when they were itty bitty though I did a LOT of trips with them by myself, because he worked crazy hours, and if I had waited for a day where he got home at a decent enough time to go to the grocery store, we all would have starved to death. They were barely 2 weeks old the first time I took them somewhere by myself, and we've been going ever since.
To all you new and soon-to-be MoM's (especially if these are your first kids): Get out by yourself with them as early as you possibly can. I know it seems daunting with two newborns, but trust me when I say the early days will almost certainly be the easiest time to take them out. Make sure they're fed and changed, and then immediately put them in their carseats and go somewhere, even if it's just 30 minutes at Target. Go. Do it while they're still young enough to sleep through everything, because soon they won't be, and if you're not used to the logistics of handling two in public by yourself when that day comes, it will be infinitely harder to figure out the best way to handle outings.
If they cry inconsolably, you just pack up and leave. If they crap through their diaper and onesie, take them to the bathroom and change them (and always make sure you have large ziplocs in your diaper bag for the soiled clothes). If they're hungry before you're ready to leave, sit down somewhere and feed them, even if it means you're on the floor in the corner somewhere. All the things that you worry about before you actually take them somewhere by yourself? Totally not big deals. At all. We've all had the screaming kids in the grocery store, and most of us have some crazy stories about blowouts at horrible times, or random places we've fed our kids. Just jump in and go for it, and you'll be amazed at how much easier it is than you imagine.
I had October babies, so they were cooped up inside all winter. We just started getting them used to going out, now that cold and flu season is passed, and it's not 20 degrees anymore. I go out alone, but I haven't done a big grocery shopping yet with them. If you have 1 carrier on top, and 1 carrier inside the carriage, where does the food go? I did a small shopping and packed it around the baby inside the carriage, but I couldn't see doing that with a big shopping.
That being said, we go to the mall, go for walks, the pedi, visiting friends - all alone. DH works 5 days a wk, so it is what it is. It's time consuming to go out with them, but definitely worth it not to be cooped up all the time!
3 isn't that bad
I think you just learn to deal with what you have and it works out.
Agreed. The hardest place for us to go is to a park, because I can't chase DD1 and push the babies in their swings at the same time.
Our grocery store just got new race car cars, and I discovered that they have 2 infant seats at the top! It makes life so much easier.
The boys were born during DH's busy season, so if I didn't take the boys grocery shopping, it didn't get done. Sure, it wasn't easy, but it sure beats going hungry or being cooped up. And, getting them out helped calm the colic, usually.
When I read stories of people taking their kids out for the first time at 6mo or so I go all
b/c that is a totally foreign concept to me
I take my babies out alone at least every other day. I do nighttime alone at least twice a week and have for quite some time.
The first time I took the girls out by myself they were 7 weeks - early for some, but I needed to do it! I had a bridal shower to go to that weekend and I purposely didn't order my gift online so that I could just bite the bullet and take the girls to go get it. I'm glad I did it right away. If I didn't get out with the girls I would go CRAZY. It's definitely a pain in the as$ to pack up the car with everything (especially when they're younger), but eventually I learned to keep some things in the car, and I'd pack/plan during their nap time.
It CAN be easier when they're older, but it depends. There's less stuff I have to bring, but since the girls are on table food, it's not like I can pull over and give them a bottle if they get hungry and then keep going, like I used to. They also don't sleep well in the car anymore (if it's errand type of driving) - and NEVER sleep in their stroller anymore, so I work around their naps. Also now that they're mobile, they're not as entertained being pushed around in a stroller.
I would also encourage MoMs to be to not put off doing it and think it's an impossible event! It's really not that big of a deal! If someone has a melt down, you drive home. End of story!
I will say that DH is going on a fishing trip next weekend and he'll be gone for 5 days. I was the one who came up with the idea to go and bought the ticket. But I did have an "oh sh$t" moment when I realized it would just be me and the girls! I'm sure everything will be fine, but it seems daunting right now. Hopefully it won't leave me too fried!!!!
DH also does nighttime alone and takes care of them alone too, BTW.
If I got to the grocery store and both girls were sleeping (in the infant stage), I'd put them in my DSNG, push that and pull a stroller. Leave the stroller at the end of the aisle when it gets heavier and then walk up the aisle with the stroller, grab what you need, and dump it in the cart - next aisle, etc.
If the babies were awake, I'd wear one and put the other in the top in their infant car seat.
Grocery shopping is not my favorite thing to do with both of them though, so I order most of our groceries online and go to the store to supplement.