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Wanting A Baby...But Leaving For BCT 20110725

BreeBensonBreeBenson
in Military Families

What should we do? Coy and I are getting married June 25th, one month before I leave for Basic Training, we would really like to start a family soon after we get married...any advise?

 

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Re: Wanting A Baby...But Leaving For BCT 20110725

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    meltoinemeltoine member

    I'm confused - are you the female? I can't tell by the name of your SO. If you're female and going to basic training in July, why would you try to get pregnant now? I don't think they allow pregnant girls in basic training. 

    If you're the male, talk openly and honestly with your FI about whether she thinks she can handle being alone for a fair bit of her pregnancy. If she hesitates in any way, wait.  

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    Smudges*MomSmudges*Mom member
    I'm confused too. Assuming you are female, why would you purposely TRY to get pregnant before BCT? My google search indicated that a female must be six months (or more) post partum after having a baby. So, IF they allowed you to postpone, and assuming you have a healthy and full term pregnancy, you are looking at pushing back at least 16 months--almost a year and half.

    IMO, you need to decide which is more important to you--joining the military or having a baby NOW. Its not all or nothing. You can join the military, then get pregnant after you have completed your training. What is your rush?
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    PhotoFanPhotoFan

    I would wait a year or 2 before trying to start a family.  They don't allow pregnant girls in Basic for one thing, and if you wait until after basic is over and then you get knocked up at your first command that isn't going to look too good. 

    Seriously just wait till you and your DH get to your first command and get the feel of how Military life is.  Then in about a year if you feel the same way go ahead and start trying.  Why the hurry to get pregnant?

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    norvellnnorvelln
    imageBreeBenson:

    What should we do? Coy and I are getting married June 25th, one month before I leave for Basic Training, we would really like to start a family soon after we get married...any advise?

     

     

    SERIOUSLY?  If you are too scared to ship then talk to your recruiter and tell him you are backing out.  DON'T use a baby as an excuse for your weakness.  That would be an insult to those on this board.


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    BreeBensonBreeBenson
    It's not that I'm scared. Being in the military has been something I've wanted to do for a while now. We are going to wait until i get out of Basic. I'll only be gone 5 months and honestly I need to wait. We need to think about how stable we are financially before we star working on a family. It won't kill us to wait.
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    meganroseleemeganroselee member

    imageSmudges*Mom:
    I'm confused too. Assuming you are female, why would you purposely TRY to get pregnant before BCT? My google search indicated that a female must be six months (or more) post partum after having a baby. So, IF they allowed you to postpone, and assuming you have a healthy and full term pregnancy, you are looking at pushing back at least 16 months--almost a year and half.

    IMO, you need to decide which is more important to you--joining the military or having a baby NOW. Its not all or nothing. You can join the military, then get pregnant after you have completed your training. What is your rush?

     

    This.  When you're young, a year seem like forever but its not. Go through basic, go through tech or AIT school and then start your family.

    33 yo, DH with MFI Iui x4, Dec 2009 to Jan2011 all BFN.... IVF May 2011 BFP, mc June 2011 at 6.5 weeks, FET Oct 2011 BFP! Sweet baby girl born 25 June 2012** started adoption process Feb 2010, approved Oct 2010, failed match in delivery rooms Feb & Aug 2011... Birthmom called back 3d after we returned home. Aug 26 2011, our sweet baby boy comes home for good!!
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    meganroseleemeganroselee member
    imageBreeBenson:
    It's not that I'm scared. Being in the military has been something I've wanted to do for a while now. We are going to wait until i get out of Basic. I'll only be gone 5 months and honestly I need to wait. We need to think about how stable we are financially before we star working on a family. It won't kill us to wait.
      Now you are making sense. GL at basic!!
    33 yo, DH with MFI Iui x4, Dec 2009 to Jan2011 all BFN.... IVF May 2011 BFP, mc June 2011 at 6.5 weeks, FET Oct 2011 BFP! Sweet baby girl born 25 June 2012** started adoption process Feb 2010, approved Oct 2010, failed match in delivery rooms Feb & Aug 2011... Birthmom called back 3d after we returned home. Aug 26 2011, our sweet baby boy comes home for good!!
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    norvellnnorvelln

    imageBreeBenson:
    It's not that I'm scared. Being in the military has been something I've wanted to do for a while now. We are going to wait until i get out of Basic. I'll only be gone 5 months and honestly I need to wait. We need to think about how stable we are financially before we star working on a family. It won't kill us to wait.

    Very good. 

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