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September 2011 Moms
TinaL99
member
Post-Partum surprises
TinaL99
member
I'm just throwing this info out there as a 2nd time Mom. I know that I was surprised about these things after DD was here. Any 2nd+ time Moms feel free to add your own! This is in no way meant to scare any FTMs, I promise!
The bleeding. I had a c/s after a failed induction and I still had a lot of PP bleeding. It definitely wasn't as bad as I thought it would be, but it was like having a very heavy period for about a week straight. It slowed down after that but still lasted about 3 weeks total. Stock up on overnight pads and take pads and mesh panties from the hospital. I might be in the minority, but I LOVED the mesh panties.
The smells. I distinctly remember posting on my local board "Motherhood is smelly" a few weeks after DD was born. The bleeding, the sweat, the breast milk, the spit up (DD was a major spitter). I smelled awful, all day, even after a shower. Thank goodness for the no sexy time for 6 weeks rule.
The hair loss. This was a big surprise to me, only because it seemed to last forever. It started around 3 months PP and didn't let up until about 6 months PP. I lost a lot of hair and now it's slowly growing back and making what I like to call "baby bangs" all around my hairline.
A lot of crazy stuff goes on PP but the most important thing is that you will fall truly in love with your baby and the sleepless nights, tears (yours and babies!) and smelliness are totally worth it.
DD1: 3/31/10
DD2: 9/7/11
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Post-Partum surprises
I LOVED the mesh panties too! Hahahaha:)
I pretty much agree with everything that you said.
Sometimes the tummy goes down right away, sometimes it doesn't. Mine did for the most part, but some women still look pregnant for weeks.
The fear to use the bathroom.
How muscles I didn't know I even had (from my neck down to my thighs) were sore from the pushing... for about 2 weeks.
I'll add to that if you are FFing, DON'T use the warm compress. Don't let warm water hit your boobs. Find the tightest sports bra you can find. And stuff cabbage leaves down in there.
I think she means use cabbage leaves relieve engorgement if you are using formula.
They are actually not recommended for BF moms due to pesticides or even microscopic creatures that could be on the leaves then go directly into babys mouth.
we read about this for a former patient on our floor at the hospital - she had a fetal demise and her milk came in and they don't give the medication anymore to dry you up...she was distraught over everything so we looked it up and found out you put a piece of cabbage in your bra and leave it there till it wilts - wow, who knew
When I first hear things like this, I wonder "who thought of this?" haha
I agree, the mesh panties are awesome for those huge pads. I also agree, as a first time mom you may not realize you will be going into the hospital in maternity and leaving in maternity clothes. I was young and naive and didn't realize this the first go round. Make sure you have the breast pads on as well whether you are BF or not because when baby crys you will leak/squirt even if you are bottle feeding LOL.
Let ppl help you. It will be normal to feel overwhelmed and tired at first but if this persists tell your doctor. I personally didn't have baby blues that needed attention but I do know plenty of ppl that do and it's okay just make sure you talk to someone about it.
Listen to your inner mother. There are plenty of times as a mother I just had a "feeling" and was right on. So if your self tells you to check on your child or whatever the case may be, then do it. There's a reason they call it mother's intuition.
yup. my mom has been a L&D and a NICU nurse and she tells patients that don't want to BF this all the time. So naturally, she had cabbage in my fridge when I got home because she knew I wasn't bfing. lol.
I was SO unprepared for the sweating. Holy sweating! The first night after DS was born, I woke up drenched in sweat...so much so that I had to call the nurse in to change my sheets. It continued for weeks. Our bodies have to get rid of all the extra fluid somehow!
I was also unprepared for the excrutiating pain of pooping. I had some nasty PP hemmis, so pooping was about as comfortable as a root canal. I dreaded it, even with daily doses of stool softeners and TONS of fluids. It took weeks to poop normally.
For me, the surprise was the leakage. My milk didn't come in at the hospital so when I got home (in hospital for 4 days with C/S), I was trying to feed DS (nurses told me to keep at it until my milk came in) in the glider and I felt something dripping on my leg. Kid you not, I looked up at ceiling to see if we had a leak. Needless to say, my milk had come in and was just flowing. And it flowed and flowed. I was also unaware that when a baby cries, any baby cries, you leak. So breast pads are a must have.
As I mentioned before, the constipation was the worst part of delivery for me. If someone asks me if there was any pain involved in DS birth, I only mention the constipation. Still gives me the chills. This time around, I am bringing stool softeners to the hospital and avoiding all pain killers/narcs if I can. Sticking with Motrin.
This is one of my absolute biggest fears about the whole labor/delivery/healing. I am SO scared of it burning when I pee and hurting so so so bad to poop. I've dealt with hemmis randomly after my loss and horrid constipation that made pooping either downright miserable or impossible. The thought of doing that again brings tears to my eyes.
Of course aside from having anything happen to the baby. I'm sure that goes without saying, but I just wanted to add that.
I'm not sure if enemas are allowed after a vag birth but I am going to have those on hand no doubt after this C/S. I know that if you experience burning when you pee, they recommend having a little squirt bottle of water to spray on you while you pee.
It's my biggest fear going into a second delivery, honestly! I had an awesome pregnancy and super easy delivery -- but I still cringe when I think back to those post partum days sitting on the toilet...
Sorry to scare you!
Can I ask a dumb question, what is it that makes you constipated after birth? Is it all the pain meds?
I take a Colace daily and my OB suggested I just continue that up until and through L&D to help get ahead of the game because it usually does happen.
LOL! You didn't scare me! I've had this fear (along with ripping from my rooter to my tooter) pretty much since I found out I was pregnant. I understand that labor and delivery is not a fun process, but I've always been more scared of the recovery than anything else. I have no idea why, but it terrifies me.
It's kind of a triple whammy -- the constipation side effects of many pain meds, the general fluid loss post partum, and a result of the overall stress of childbirth. All of those lead to slow moving bowels!
Hemmis and tears/episiotomies add to the pain factor, which doubles the fun. Yay.
The OP mentioned the PP bleeding, but I thought I would mention this: it gave me a god-aweful rash. It was like diaper rash, and so sore! I have a couple friends who had the same thing, and my mom did too, so it wasn't just me. My mom told me to use the A&D diaper rash ointment, and sure enough, that seemed to help a lot.
I don't know if it's something in the composition of the fluid, or if it's just because it goes on so long. I just know it burned really bad.
My advice: take as much time off from work as you can and have people there to help you out. Never turn down help. Ever.
The first couple of months were a total blur for me. I was beyond exhausted and DS wasn't a very good sleeper. I had a VERY long labor that ended up in c/s. I only took 8 weeks off and thought I only needed "help" for the first two weeks. I will definitely do things different this time around.
PS: Stay in the hospital until they kick you out and take as many pairs of those mesh underwear that they allow. They ROCK.
I was seriously surprised at how much pain I was in...even a month after delivery!! It took me over a month to walk normal. I walked like a stick was stuck up my butt because of all the pressure I had. Given I also had a lot of issues healing properly...but it can happen. I still (over a year after having DS) have pain when I stand for a long time or sit in certain ways.
The bleeding was crazy! I didn't think you could bleed so much! But take as many ice packs and mesh panties as you can. Just keep asking for them even if you aren't out to take home with you. I just found like 3 pairs the other day in a bag from the hospital:)
Also, tmi....I'm not sure if this happened to anyone else, but after delivery I couldn't use the muscles to stop myself mid pee...or farting. Yeah. If you want to hold one in...you can't!!!! So embarrassing. Not sure if it was the swelling or just pain or what. Am I alone on this one??
ETA: The squirt bottles are AMAZING!!! I asked for 2 (one to keep upstairs and down). Seriously, they make you feel so much better and clean. Also stock up on the numbing spray. It was a god-send!!
YES! I am way more scared of the recovery than labor and delivery. I am even asking my doc whether or not starting back up on my metformin is OK, just because I know I won't be constipated while taking it!
I was a fan of the mesh panties everytime and will be this time around I'm sure.
The little spray bottle and tucks pads were my BFF after delivery. I recommend to every mom to take EVERYTHING they give you. You don't know how great taking those huge pads are until you get home and want one. DH had a hard time finding large enough pads in stores.
The bleeding post vaginal birth was miserable. It ranged from 3-5 weeks. Very heavy at first and with blood clots.
If you are breastfeeding, the pain of your uterus contracting is very uncomfortable and painful at first.
I never lost my hair after having my boys but I did swell up, they pump you full of water with the IV when you are there so your first pee is literally the longest pee of your life (and after my 3 boys, they measured your first urine each time)
With you on these two. I had an episiotomy and tore beyond it, so standing was even painful weeks later. No one told me it could take that long. Hoping for a quicker recovery this time around!
And so with you on the farting. It was incredibly embarassing - although DH thought it was hilarious.
Here are three things that really surprised me about post partum.
1) I had NO control in peeing for 2 days. As in none, i had no idea i even went then boom i was wet. However, i pooped easily on night number one so we all have our own issues. I was so concered that i was going to pee forever with no control, but all good before i left the hospital.
2) My nipples split open (horrifying) and that ointment (lansinoe or something like that) was like trying to heal a shot gun wound with a band aid. I HIGHLY suggest APNO (all purpose nipple ointment) but you will need a doctor/midwife prescription. Was a huge help.
3) My daughter looked nothing like i imagined! She had a ton of black hair (i am very fair). I remember holding her and being like 'wow I thought you would be bald'. She did have my enormous hands and feet though which was very cool to see.
I dont know if anyone said this yet or not, but i was surprised at how pregnant i still looked after giving birth.
i guess i was naive and thought i'd walk out of the hospital in some of my old clothes.
yeah... that didn't happen.
1. Breast feeding supplies. My sister had to go to the store and bought me Medela tender care lanolin and breast pads. So having some on hand is helpful.
2. Peri bottles! They give them to you to squirt water down there. I took two of them home and used them a ton!
3. Get pads. I wasn't sure how much the PP bleeding would be so I didn't stock up on pads. I send DH to target and bless his heart, but he didn't know what to get. This time I'm going to pick them out myself as well as use the giant ones from the hospital.
4. 1st night at home. For some reason our first and second night at home was a nightmare. The worst ever. Everyone is tired and frustrated. I think if you're prepared for knowing you'll have a couple nights of hell it might be easier. I'm glad I pushed through and kept breastfeeding instead of giving into the formula because it was just an adjustment period and DD became a great eater.
5. Overwhelmed by visitors. You can say no to visitors sometimes. It's harder with people constantly coming by. Not all visitors help, and most of the time I was smelly and unattractive. It's okay to say no sometimes.
ETA:
I forgot to add. I had a vaginal non-medicated birth. Afterwards the nurse wanted to collect some pee and check on my PP bleeding - so they put a little pan in the toilet for me to pee in. The first time I got off the bed I couldn't walk, not even with the nurse's assistance. I was very weak from a 43 hour labor and all the wieght/blood loss. The nurse had to bring the pan to the bedside. It was awkward but I literally couldn't walk to the bathroom. The following day I was fine - but I was so surprised at how in shock my body was.
This, totally. I agree with everything everyone else has said (except, thankfully, I didn't have trouble going to the bathroom. I took colace right off the bat, don't know if that helped a lot or not). We only stayed in the hospital one night and then went home. The first night home, I swear DS cried the entire night. It felt never-ending. It got better each night after that, but he didn't do that in the hospital so it was a total shock to us and really overwhelming.
Oh, all these posts are making me remember and dread labor and recovery so much...
I really was not a fan of the mesh underwear because I felt like they were so big and the huge pads they gave me didn't stay in place because they didn't have sticky tapes on the bottom, they just floated around..But you have to pretty much use the mesh ones because otherwise you would ruin yours..
With my first dc my stomach went right down which was nice, but I still needed to wear maternity. With my second, it took a week or so..I had lots of uterine cramps after delivery of my second dc, I thought I was going to have diaharrea but the nurse told me it was my uterus contracting and it would be worse with the third..I only bled for a week or so and didn't think it was that bad or heavy..
I didn't realize that they would take me to the bathroon and stand there the first time I went. They wanted me to get up right away and go and they said they had to stand there with me to make sure I went pee and that everything was okay. I went to 2 different hospitals and they did this both times..
Both times I got hemmis and after my first dc they were on fire, tuck pads defintely helped, My doctor said to use tucks or preparation H but not both..one thing I remember is the first time the day after I had my ds, the nurse came in and said she had to check the hemmis! Lovely, so I had to roll over and have her check my bum..
My nurse said we could take whatever diapers and things were in the drawers. I even took the big pads they had me sleep on(the extra unused ones) because they were great to stick in the diaper bag and use for changing pads later when I was out with the baby-I would just throw them out..
I am so dreading delivery, not because I think it will be so bad but, because I just hate the mess of it all and being at the hospital. Sorry I am such a downer.