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September 2011 Moms
melissajoy1985
member
Anyone elses Husbands do nothing for Mothers Day??
melissajoy1985
member
I'm super frustrated... maybe it's just pregnancy hormones or something, but I had kind of hinted for the last month or so how it would be fun to celebrate Mothers Day cause I'm half way there and lets face it... I'm not my normal non mother pregnant self anymore. But DH totally dosent see the point... he dosent think that we should do anything for Mothers Day becuase I'm not a mother yet..... (he's not a super sappy, flower buying, poem writing kinda guy usually!) but I thought this was diffrent... Kinda sad about it... anyone else??
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Re: Anyone elses Husbands do nothing for Mothers Day??
Ha I already vented on another post, but I'll join in on yours too! My DH said the exact same thing...I'm not "really" a Mom yet...oh yeh??? Last time I checked I've been toting his baby around for the last 21 weeks!! And, It's been a tough pregnancy for me!
Even a simple Happy Mother's Day would have sufficed! GRR.
Yep.
My sister sent me flowers and random strangers wished me happy mother's day for the past three days. I spent all day yesterday at the store wrapping presents for people's wives/mothers, got home exhausted, made dinner, woke up this morning, nothing. I was pretty disappointed. I think mostly because I have to spend all day making MIL dinner, since DH dropped the ball and promised her her favorite dinner but forgot that he's working.
ETA: I KNOW I'm being ridiculous and it's just the hormones going obnoxiously nuts, but I still can't help it. I have two pregnant friends who's DH's did something for them.
This was a little insensitive, although I truly hope that you didn't mean it to be.
OP, I am torn on this issue. While I totally know that we are already mothers, I think that for a man it's not that simple. They are already fathers as well, but may not feel that way until the baby gets here. Also, not to minimize AT ALL the last 20-24 weeks, but really, we haven't had to do the hard part yet, ha! I think it's nice to be acknowledged as a mother by DH (I got a Happy Mother's Day from him this morning) and maybe a card, but flowers, chocolate, breakfast in bed...that's all a bit much when we are expectant mothers.
Just my opinion, and I know everyone doesn't feel this way.
ETA: I'm sorry you're bummed, but maybe you could have DH treat you to dinner or something? I hope your day gets better!!
Ha! Are we married to the same man? Because my husband reacted the same way despite my hints. Even a colleague and some students emailed me wishing me a happy mother's day!
Sadly, there were no diamond earrings for me this morning
Ditto!
I'm just not understanding this whole "you aren't a mother yet" thing.
UHMM if anyone asked me, "Do you have any kids?" I would pat my belly and say "Yes, I have a son". He is not non existant just because he is still in me.
My DH and family all recognized me today as a mother, and it really irritates me that some of you, at least the ones who wanted to be, were not.
"What did my fingers do before they held you? What did my heart do with it's love?"
Ditto. I think my Dad actually told him a few weeks ago that it's kind of a big deal and if he hadn't, I'm not sure he would've done anything. Funny though, I jokingly said that he would "set the precedent" for father's day and he said that while he views me as a mother, he doesn't really see himself as a father yet because he felt like I was doing all the work!
When I was pregnant with Sam we did nothing for Mother's Day, and I didn't expect it. I hadn't actually had the baby and it seemed weird to celebrate before his birth. I had him later that month, so Joe got to have a Father's Day celebration nearly right away.
I think it is pretty normal to wait til you actually have a child, since nominally the gifts/recognition is from the kid, right?
Peanut Butter and Jelly!
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I told him not to do anything. I got cards from 2 of our friends, and a great set of lotion from one of my oldest friends, but I really didn't expect anything.
He's been all sorts of awesome during the pregnancy so far. I'm fine with not making a big deal out of today. We both sort of felt like celebrating today would have been premature - sort of counting our chickens before they hatch.
Happy Spring!.
Wedding Anniversary: August 7th 2010 BFP: December 22nd 2010 Beautiful Little Birthday: August 30th 2011
BLOG.
Agree with this 100%...the whole 'you haven't done all the hard stuff yet' is BS in my mind. It takes a huge toll on your body (not that I'm complaining, I'm not) and think about all of the mental preparation / research, etc that is done in the 9 months preparing for LO's arrival. For me, I'm working with our dogs to prepare them, researching the best/safest baby items to buy, working extra hours to get some extra cash, and just learning to wrap my head around the fact that I'll be a mother. Not to mention taking care of my body so my LO has a great chance at developing into a healthy little baby....I personally think that's HUGE and should be recognized. We're still mom's, our role will just be different once the baby is here.
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I agree with your DH. I was the same way when I was pregnant with DS#1. I didn't consider myself a mother yet, cause I was still just pregnant. You're a mother once the child is born. It's like saying "Oh, I'm a bride-to-be I just don't have a groom or wedding date yet." It doesn't make sense to me.
Same thing with father's day. DH said he wasn't a Dad yet cause the baby wasn't here.
We'll always remember our angel baby: BFP 9/24/10, M/C 10/23/10 8w4d
MY FI had to work (he works every Sunday). The only people who wished me a happy mother's day were my sister MIL (random), and my aunt's best friend (she's like another aunt).
I went to visit my mom and we watched a movie.
I don't really care that FI didn't do anything for me, I know that he wouldn't agree that someone is a parent before their kid is actually born.
If someone asked me if I had any kids I would probably say "not yet, but I'm expecting a boy in Sept."