Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
Re: How far to travel for a VBAC is too risky?
I would maybe talk to that DR. office and see what they think. I would travel that far if it meant a VBAC but we live in the boondocks and travel those distances a lot.
One thing to consider is the real possibility of if you can't make it to the hospital.
If you are going to be having a winter baby, how are the roads?
What about traffic? Can you feasibly make it to that Dr.'s office for monthly/weekly appts?
Personally, the routine visits would bother me more. I think if the extra gas money won't break you... and you are prepared, I really don't think it's too big of a deal.
My hospital took an hour to get to with my first. The extra 30 minutes wouldn't have been a much bigger deal. Other than the fact that being in the car and in labor sucks. I would be willing to travel that far for a VBAC this time. The downside would be that you might not be able to labor at home as long as you would like. They might want you to come in a little earlier, or you might feel more comfortable going in earlier. So if that's something that's important to you, that might be something to think about.
I live in a pretty busy metropolitan area so admittedly the idea of being more than 30 minutes from a really really good hospital doesn't sit well with me (because it's not likely that I'd ever be in that situation).
That said, how is the traffic in your area? I know your in GA but you guys still had some crappy weather this winter right? I would hate to have a winter baby and have to travel that far on icy roads. I'm biased in favor of a hospital birth but in your situation I might consider this - are there any midwives/reputable birth centers that are closer?
I live in Hilton Head and will travel to Savannah for my VBAC. Its about an hour drive (on a good day). I'm concerned because my first labor lasted less than three hours from first contraction to pushing and this time we have the added stress of dropping my son of somewhere first, not to mention hoping that those people we are dropping him off with are off work to begin with- I can't wait for my dad to get home from work because he is an hour away (and that is who we plan to have watch him). I'm really nervous but I think its in my best interest to do everything possible for a VBAC.
I didn't think I could find a VBAC friendly doctor in my area but I contacted a doula who does VBACs and then asked who she recommend and thats who she mentioned so I went with her. I'm VERY impressed with her as she doesn't induce, and the practice is just her and 2 midwives so I think its pretty "hippy friendly" if you will.
i'm travelling 90 min away....to the closest hospital. my doc doesn't seem concerned. i went to my local dr who did my appts until around 26 weeks, then i transferred to my vbac dr..... the drive to the appts is a big pain, and I wish I would've gone longer to my previous dr, but I wanted to develop a relationship with my vbac dr.
I think you'll just head to the hospital a lot earlier than before.