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March 2011 Moms
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LO's Preferences: You vs. DH

agytayagytay member
in March 2011 Moms

Already twice today my 7 week old has been extremely fussy while DH holds him. As soon as DH passes him off to me, LO stops crying instantly without me doing any soothing techniques. Has anyone's LO started to do this?

DH works long hours and doesn't get to spend a lot of time with LO and when he does, LO tends to be fussy. I feel bad and wish LO's preference was not so obvious. I guess it doesn't help that I EBF as well. Anyone else experience this?

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Re: LO's Preferences: You vs. DH

  • mrsgailmrsgail member
    Mine definitely prefers me.  I think DH assumes that since I have the boobs he can't soothe her so is quick to pass her off when she's crying.  She also has the evening fussy time and we call it her "Mommy Colic" cause I'm really the only one to calm her down during that time of the evening. 
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  • Phil&CorinnaPhil&Corinna member
    I feel my DH is a fantastic dad but he doesn't try as hard to soothe him - he stops crying when I pick him up faster because I do stuff to encourage it (singing, dancing, bouncing, patting his bum) where DH will sit on the couch and bounce a bit in his arm but LO just gets angrier.  If he's not as upset, DH will put DS on his chest and do "tummy time" but LO just falls asleep on there!!
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  • veggybuggveggybugg member

    imagemrsgail:
    Mine definitely prefers me.  I think DH assumes that since I have the boobs he can't soothe her so is quick to pass her off when she's crying.  She also has the evening fussy time and we call it her "Mommy Colic" cause I'm really the only one to calm her down during that time of the evening. 

     

    my husband says the same thing.   Boobs.

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  • kare81bearkare81bear
    DD has calmed down as soon as she hears my voice or on really fussy days the second I take her from day one.  I feel bad but DH says she'll like him later when she doesn't need my boobs. lol
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  • mrsbmw09mrsbmw09
    DD does prefer me over DH, but it's a close race. DH goes out of his way to spend every spare moment he has with her, so she has a close bond with him. There are those times though when she's fussy and only wants me.
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  • myst33myst33
    DS prefers me and often I'm the only one that can calm him.  Sometimes it makes dh sad, but whenever he tries to soothe ds, he's always quick to say that he needs his mommy.
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  • homelyauthorhomelyauthor

    Am I the only one who seems to have a LO who prefers DH to me? DH can almost always almost instantly calm him down. I can't often calm him down when he's upset, other than nursing him. Quite frustrating. 

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  • StephanieA36StephanieA36
    J seems to like me a lot more.  DH doesn't seem to be able to soothe her, but I don't think that he tries very hard. He is a fantastic father and wonderful with her, but he doesn't listen when I tell him she needs to walk around and sing to her.  He also told me that overtime I leave the house she screams bloody murder. 
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  • 1Mrs.Jones1Mrs.Jones

    LO prefers me now, but she liked him way better the first two weeks. When she was born, she had swallowed meconium and I needed so many stitches that it took half an hour. Right after birth, DH went with her to the NICU nurses and I stayed to get stiched up. He held her first. I nursed her, then a nurse took LO and DH to our room- they said that they were going to bring me right behind them, but it took them 20 minutes to get to it. Sooo I blame that for the early weeks of her preferring DH.

    Now she likes me best, but she likes DH better than aunts and uncles, so she still has a parent/baby bond with him.

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  • amethyst1220amethyst1220
    imagehomelyauthor:

    Am I the only one who seems to have a LO who prefers DH to me? DH can almost always almost instantly calm him down. I can't often calm him down when he's upset, other than nursing him. Quite frustrating. 

    I actually don't see a preference. It just depends, one day I'm better able to soothe her, next day it's him. I read that sometimes babies just need someone different. I'm home w her all day and we're all happy when I can hand her off to sh when he gets home. He burps her better, too, and that is sometimes what she needs. Other times it's boobs :)
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  • TaraC9474TaraC9474
    imagePhil&Corinna:
    I feel my DH is a fantastic dad but he doesn't try as hard to soothe him - he stops crying when I pick him up faster because I do stuff to encourage it (singing, dancing, bouncing, patting his bum) where DH will sit on the couch and bounce a bit in his arm but LO just gets angrier. 
    This
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  • paulrulespaulrules
    Me.  He could spend his entire life sleeping on my chest.  DH is fantastic but he just wants to be with me... or maybe my mom... all of the time.  I'm listening to him fuss now because I'm not around but resisting the urge to take him b/c he needs to learn to feel just as comfy with his dad.
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