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July 2011 Moms
MPSW
member
Moms of 2+: Thoughts about hospital stay?
MPSW
member
This post on the Toddler board got me thinking about how we'll handle me being in the hospital. We have a live-in nanny and my parents are close by, so we don't have to worry too much about having an intricate plan about who will stay with DD when I go into labor. But I expect DH will be back and forth a lot more this time (rather than just staying with me the whole time) and will be bringing DD back and forth too.
I have some friends who don't want their older LOs to see them in the hospital. Thoughts?
What are your plans?
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Re: Moms of 2+: Thoughts about hospital stay?
I had #2 at 1:30 in the morning. DH was with me until I got to my PP room around 4am but then he left so he could be home when DD #1 woke up. He came back late-morning and introduced the girls to one another but didn't stay long (she was only 18 months at the time) and they came back the following day too. DH came alone when he picked me up to take me and DD#2 home. It worked out fine for us. We don't have a live-in nanny but we have two sets of grandparents close by.
This time, we'll just take it as it comes. The IL's will be on call to come to our house since they live the closest, but other than that, we'll just have to go with the flow and see what happens. I'm not too stressed about it though. Labor is kind of a process, not a "OMG my water broke let's go NOW!"
Since I'll be having a repeat c-section planning has been easier for us this time around. My mom will be coming to stay with us two weeks before my due date. The morning of delivery we will leave DD sleeping at home with Grandma. When we are moved to our PP room DH will call to have them come in and see us. We're going to leave it up to DD how long she stays (as in how long she is content to stay) and then Grandma will take her home. Each night DH will go home to put her to bed, but then return to the hospital to stay with me. When DD wakes up in the morning my mom will bring her to the hospital to see me and then they will go on for their activity of the day (zoo, botanical center, play dates). We only live 10 minutes from the hospital so my mom may bring her up a couple times per day depending on what DD wants to do. Right now the plan is for my mom to bring her to the hospital the morning of our discharge so she can "help" us bring the new baby home. This was actually her idea because she talks about coming in with him the first time and showing him around.
We've been prepping her to see me in the hospital by looking at pictures from her delivery. She knows I'll be in a hospital gown and probably have an IV. She also knows I won't be able to move my legs at first, which we explained was so I didn't kick the doctors if they tickled me while "taking the baby out".
That's hilarious!
When I had Camden my grandmother, aunt, & J's mom took turns with Brianna while I was in the hospital. J's Mom brought her to meet Camden a few hours after he was born. J went home at night & then took her in the morning to whoever was watching her before he went to work.
This time Im hoping for more of the same. Someone will stay here with the kids while Im in there, bring them to meet baby, & J will sleep here with them & then someone will take them while he goes to work.
Im not letting him waste vacation time while Im in the hospital unless 1 of the kids has a really hard time with whats happening.
I dont see any reason for the siblings to not meet baby in the hospital, I think it makes more sense to them that way to see where Mommy is & get an idea of whats happening.
FIL is "on call" to take DS when I go into labor, but he lives 45 min away. I also have a friend who lives on the way to the hospital that offered to take him in an emergency. I figure DS will be with FIL (who would go get him from my friend's house) the first night if I am in labor over night again. Otherwise I assume that DH will be home with DS overnight and he will go to daycare during the day and DH will try and switch to work at the hospital I am at so he can stop in and see me between cases. If it's the weekend, I guess DS will just stay with FIL, but I would like him to come visit me.
I guess this is something DH and I should really talk about more lol.
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We live about 35-45 minutes from the hosptial & my best friend lives in the same town as the hospital. So we will be taking DD with us & dropping her off to stay at my BFF's house while I'm in the hospital. The plan is for DH to work while I'm in the hospital & BFF will bring DD by for a visit during the day. After DH gets off work he will bring DD over for another visit & to eat dinner with us, then she will go back to BFF's. She stays with her quite a bit, so it won't be too traumatic for her to stay with her for a day or so.
I have been worrying about this as well. I am hoping that since we have to be induced, that we could plan to let SD go with her mom before that happens and then she can come back after we come home from the hospital. I don't really want her there for the birth (mainly because I don't want her mom to come around), plus someone has to watch her when it is actually time to give birth and my husband needs to be with me, not watching her.
We don't have family around, so I figured worst case, I put one of my really good friends on stand-by. SD is old enough to be at home for a tiny bit alone, i.e. till someone can get there while we head to the hospital.
When I had my second son Dh brought my older son to see me and it was really nice at first. We got cute pics of him with his brother and he was so happy. But when it was time to leave me there, he freaked out. I felt terrible, and it made me want to go home.
This time I will let both boys come up and see me and the baby. My oldest son is 4.5 and he is SO excited to meet his sister. I think (hope) it will be easier on my little boy to leave me there because he will be with his brother? I don't know. I figure I survived Alex's meltdown at leaving me in the hospital and I will survive Foster's, too, if it happens!
I'm really stressed about this! My parents live 6 hours away and may not be able to leave immediately (they own their own business), but my mom will come as soon as possible! We have a friend who agreed to watch DD, but because our schedules we haven't had much time to see her and DD doesn't know her too well and has never spent the night without us. I'm so anxious about this. I'm hoping that my friend will be able to come over to our house to stay will DD until I either a. have the baby and Dh can go home to DD or b. my mom arrives and will stay with DD.
We haven't made any plans other than that!
We are very honest with her usually, but something about telling her they were numbing me up so I wouldn't feel them cutting me seemed too harsh! She has seen my c-section scar from her birth and actually thinks its a zipper they will use to get the baby out, but only doctors can open it.
DH will not stay with me at the hospital....we have lots of help for the boys, but he will still go home to do the bedtime routine and dinner with the boys.
We send our babies to the nursery at night and I have plenty of visitors during the day. DH will also go to work still during the day. I would rather have him home a couple days when we bring the baby home.
I will probably have him bring the boys by 1-2 times (I will be in the hospital for 5 days due to a c-section). It really is hard to have them in the hospital room. There is nothing for them to do and they just get bored.
DS2 will be especially hard in the hospital room because he is into everything right now. He will for sure be pushing every button and pulling on my IV, etc.
We brought DS1 to the hospital almost every day when we had DS2 and we're not making that mistake again this time.....it was too much for everyone.