anything I need to know about R&R — The Bump
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anything I need to know about R&R

My DH will be coming home sometime in the future for 15 days for R&R and didnt know if there anything particular I need to know.....This is our first deployment so anything will be helpful :)
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Re: anything I need to know about R&R

  • Have fun, but don't plan too much.  Keep it low-key and follow his lead.  If he wants to hang with family and friends go for it, or if he wants to travel and get out and do things every day plan for that, but if he would rather sit at home with you and your son for 15 days, let him. 

    And whatever you do, enjoy the present time together, and don't dwell on the fact that he'll be leaving again shortly.  Make the most of every day.

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  • ITA.. and leslie.. dont you just love that fleece blanky? they are soo comfy.. the one in your siggy
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  • Don't plan anything. If he comes home and wants to be doing something all the time then do it. But when DH was home for R&R last month we pretty much just stayed home and played with our son unless there was something that we had to do. He went out with his friends a couple of times but that was about it. Just leave any planning up to him and enjoy the time that you have together!
    Married 5/29/09
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  • imageladyraejewelry:
    ITA.. and leslie.. dont you just love that fleece blanky? they are soo comfy.. the one in your siggy

    Haha, I do love the comfy factor, but I'm only "allowed" to use it after the kids are in bed.  That is THEIR blanket that was given to them by Daddy when he was home on leave (ok that they pretty much stole from him), and they will cut you if you try to use it. 

    At least they share it nicely between the two of them though, so I can't complain much.  ;) 

  • Every time my DH has come home on R&R we seriously don't do anything. At all. But, if you do plan something.. don't get upset if he doesn't want to. Depending on your DH.. you really just have to play everything by ear.

    TTC #1 since 2006
    USN Seabee Wife
    In Search of the Stork;
  • It really depends on him.  Last time we didn't do anything, just stayed at the house.  This time he wants to get away, and take a vacation instead of sitting at the house.  So we are going camping.  It's our kind of vacation.  It will nice and relaxing.   

    I had a friend that rented a beach cottage for a week, and they wished they had rented for the whole 2 weeks.

    Ask him what he wants. 

  • All PPs had the best advice: don't plan and ask him what he wants.  When I deployed and came home on R&R, I did what I wanted to do.  Depending on his work situation overseas, he may want to be the owner of his destiny for the next two weeks.

    Definitely have some ideas if he seems overwhelmed, but try not to be disappointed if he doesn't want to do anything at all except veg and love on his family.

    Enjoy your leave time together!

    Army Girl, been in since Feb 2003 married to an Army Man, in since 1990. Daisypath Anniversary tickers Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker BabyFetus Ticker
  • Have his favorite comfort food ready, even if he doesn't ask for it (option overload will often result in dozens of "Uhhh, I don't know" answers!). We eat very healthy food in general, and DH's redeployment food is hot dogs and Kraft mac & cheese. Disgusting, but it's his thing, so we always eat it the first night.


    Ditto to the don't overplan suggestions.


    And be prepared for an odd dissociation at first. Literally the first time I saw DH in the airport, it was "ooh, there he is! Wait, that's not him. Yes it is. He looks a little different. But it's him! Right? Here we go..." For us, it wasn't a big makeout session with mad sex as soon as we got home. It was sortof a tentative physical reunion. Kissing felt a little funny, and the first day or two we needed to just be near each other and break back into our routine. So if that happens for you, you're not the only one! It doesn't mean you didn't miss him or love him or cry for him in the past months. Plus, he's adjusting to having a toddler who he doesn't know well.

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  • I ditto Leslie.  Stocking the fridge with some beer and putting something pretty on would be nice.
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  • Yes I agree with everyone as well! Just let him decide what he wants to do. It is hard to not dwell on how much time you have left while they are home but, think of it as another day closer to when they will be home for good!

    My DH and I are planning a get out of town mini vacation and going to sit on our bums for 3 days straight and do nothing but enjoy each other. We are going to turn the cell phones off and take a break from reality! I can't wait!


    My Ovulation Chart

    TTC #1 since March 2010

    DH - SA = Low Morphology. Great overall count.

    August 2012: HSG - All Clear

    September 2012: Timed Intercourse 100 mg Clomid CD 4-8 w/ Repronex & HCG Injections = BFN

    October 2012: Timed Intercourse 100 mg Clomid CD 4-8 = BFN

    September 2013: New Doctor: 50 mg Clomid CD 5-9 & IUI #1 = BFN

    October 2013: 50 mg Clomid CD 3-7 & IUI #2 = BFN 

    November 2013 to ??? = On a mental break for now.

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