traveling while awaiting a m/c

runbike09 · April 2011

I found out yesterday that I had a m/c. I am beyond devasted and just trying to get through the day. I knowit will all work out, but right now I just need to be sad.

I am concerned because I have not had any bleeding yet. I am a teacher and am supposed to be taking 40 kids to NYC for an overnight this weekend.

For people who have had a natural m/c-will I be able to handle it if it happens while away this weekend? I will be on a charter bus for 5 hours and then sight-seeing/seeing a Broadway show on Saturday. I am the senior teacher going on this trip and really don't feel like I can't go....but in the same thought-at some point I have to take care of my personal life too....

I don't know what to do...any thoughts?

stratton23al · April 2011

First, I'm so sorry for your loss.

Last week I went in for an appointment at 11 weeks and found out I'd had a missed miscarriage. The baby had stopped developing around 8 weeks. With my situation, I started spotting the day after my appointment, although technically I'd already been waiting close to three weeks.

It seems everyone's body is on a different timeline so its hard to say whether or not things would be starting before, on or after your weekend away. As far as my experience went, I wouldn't have been able to do the trip. I experienced a lot of bleeding/things passing which basically wouldn't have allowed me to be out and about. Based on how uncomfortable it can be, and episodes that could last from minutes to hours, I wouldn't want to experience that on a charter bus, or risk being in the middle of sight seeing.

In the end, you will know what is best for you. You'll know whether staying busy is a good thing, or if you need privacy and personal time to think/grieve. Just keep in mind some of the physical happenings that could potentially be really difficult to deal with while away from home/while you're very busy.

If you feel you really have to go maybe a D&C before your trip would be a better option, although I have no experience or knowledge of the days following the procedure and what that's like.

Again, I'm very sorry you're going through this.

dawnrob5 · April 2011

I am truly sorry.

From what I have read, it seems that everyone is definitely unique in how the process works for them. I found out last week that I will be having a miscarriage and still no signs of bleeding either so I'm afraid it might happen at work or something.

Do any other chaperones know what you are going through right now? It would help me to know that in an emergency I could bail and head back to the hotel if necessary. Do you think that would be an option? Overall, your health and well being is top priority so I would see how you feel. Worst case scenario, can you get someone to go in your place? If your students knew (and I'm sure they wont) but they would want you to take care of yourself!

AgWife83 · April 2011

Hi there. I'm very sorry for your loss and glad that you have found this board; it's a great place for support and advice.

I went through a natural m/c three days after finding out that the baby didn't have a heartbeat. The anxiety of waiting for it to happen was awful - and not something I would want to go through while traveling with high school students. When the actual m/c happened, I basically went in to labor, which was the most painful experience of my life, but luckily very brief. I didn't have a lot of bleeding or clotting, the whole thing took me about 30 minutes to complete, and the rest of the time was like being on a medium period - but even though I had it relatively "easy," I thank my lucky stars it happened at home and not while I was out or away. I did everything in my power during that wait to stay home, and I'm glad I did.

MarxieVonTrapp · April 2011

I'm so sorry for your loss. I apologize that this is a quick email, but I had a d&c when my miscarriage was discovered. The day of the procedure I felt a little out of sorts afterwards, but later in the day and the next day I felt fine. I had friends in from out of town and had to act like nothing happened--incredibly difficult, but it was possible.

sabrina69barnes · April 2011

I never had to wait to miscarry. I didn't know anything was happening until it started. I started bleeding around 6pm on 12/21 and was in the ER. I knew I was going to miscarry again so I asked for pain meds. The next day the cramping got a lot stronger. I took two Vicodin. I could still feel that the cramps were strong but I couldn't feel much of the pain. I had Christmas shopping to do so I was at the mall most of the day. I did fine but I was drugged from the pain meds. I was fine to shop but I wouldn't have been able to drive. I changed my pad every hour our so. I didn't have too many clots and the ones I did have only passed when I was actually on the toilet. The next few days I took vicodin so I could be drugged and get through the holiday without crying in front of my other kids but I didn't need it anymore for the pain.

On 12/21 I was 6w 5d but I'm guessing from my betas that the baby had passed away before that. I'm sure things would have been much worse if I had been further along. I would have been able to go on the trip you've decribed. Everyone has such a different experience and I don't know how far along you were. If you think you want to go ask your Dr for some narcotic pain meds. You may not need them but it would be horrible to need them and not have them while you are away. GL and I'm so sorry about your loss.

gardenandread · April 2011

I was in the same situation as you were with this last m/c. I was supposed to take a group of students to a convention six hours away from home. I was lucky and I was able to find an alternate to cover for me. There were several reasons I chose not to go. One, I did not want to start miscarrying on the trip and not have my doctor or my husband nearby. Two, I did not want to risk putting my students in the position of having to be the chaperones for me. And, three, I was way too emotional to go. Everything reminded me of what I had just lost, and I really just wanted time to be able to grieve on my own in private. Hope that helps, I am so sorry for your loss.

chrissyevans80 · April 2011

I am so sorry for your loss. My thoughts and prayers are with you. Whatever you decide try to remember that your going to need to give yourself time to heal from this both physically and emotionally. I had tried to have a natural m/c for 5 days before I had to have an emergency D&C. The pain was full blown labor pains and I was constantly in the bathroom. Everybody has a different reaction to m/c but just dont push yourself too much. Take care and know your not alone!

LexiSophie55 · April 2011

Everyone is different, but I don't think there is any way you can risk it. I was in "labor" for about 3 hours, and was unable to leave the bathroom for most of it. Once the pregnancy was a confirmed blighted ovum, I miscarried 4 days later (and I've been bleeding since - on day 24) . Part of me wonders if I then told my body it wasn't viable, so that made my body realize it needed to miscarry. I know stupid, but I wonder. Anyways, I've also had bouts of contractions since then as well. Good luck. I hope you are able to figure something out. Sorry for your loss.

RaeJ004 · April 2011

First I am so sorry you're going through this.

I would advise against travelling. With my natural miscarriage I was in a lot of pain for quite a few days. Doubled over in tears, feeling sick because of how bad the pain was. And if it does not happen naturally, and God forbid you end up needing an emergency d&c while you're away, it could be detrimental to your health.

Also, when I finally accepted that I was going to miscarry I was okay with it (I think I was still in denial). But when it actually started happening I was an emotional wreck.

Just some things to think about.

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