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hesitant n00b waving 'hi'

astroMomastroMom member
in Attachment Parenting

Well, I've been kind of intimidated to post to this board or really even lurk.  In general, I definitely would say I agree with attachment parenting *in theory*.  However, I have some problems with implementing it personally.

1)  I wanted so badly to carry LO most of the time, but I have back problems that were made much worse by pregnancy/birth.  I did use carriers/Moby some but it made my back worse, so I had to mostly sit and snuggle him.  We also do massage every night before bed and sometimes during the day.

2)  I am a crazy sleeper.  I wouldn't trust myself at all to co-sleep, though I wish I could!  He slept in our room in a bassinet for 2 months, then we transitioned him to the crib in a room attached to our room, so that I could get ready to go back to work.

I do nurse most of the time when around LO but work FT & pump for him as well.

Where else can I focus my energy?  Or, am I just an AP fail due to physical and working FT limitations?  (hopefully not!) 

DS born 8/2010 - preliminary stages of SN int'l adoption - fur mama to 2 shelter dogs;  cloth diapering, babywearing, EBFing mama

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Re: hesitant n00b waving 'hi'

  • KateLouiseKateLouise member
    As far as I'm concerned there's no right or wrong way to practice AP. Being an AP means that you respond to your child's needs and form a close attached bond with them rather than adhering to strict rules. Everyone has their own way of interpreting this and their own set of limitations. Do what feels best to you and your family. The ladies here are really welcoming and have a wealth of knowledge and wisdom. As to where else can you focus your efforts? I love having a bath with LO. it gives us skin on skin time and it's a great way to destress at the end of the work day. There's lots of ideas you can look into around positive discipline, baby led weaning, and I'm sure other ladies will have lots of other ideas.
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  • shaunna&chadshaunna&chad

    I agree with PP, in that AP is not about following a list of things you have to do.  They are helpful tools that can definitely help form an attachment, but being an AP parent is more about following and responding to the needs of your child with respect and empathy, using only the tools that work best for your family.  You might want to read the Attachment Parenting book by Dr Sears.  It has some good info on being an attached, working parent.

    Good luck, and welcome!

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  • astroMomastroMom member

    Thanks!  I definitely wanted to note being 'intimidated' was in my head and in no way a reflection of this board!

    We definitely follow the overarching philosophy, but I've just been upset with myself that I haven't been able to do more...cue mommy guilt.  ;)

    DS born 8/2010 - preliminary stages of SN int'l adoption - fur mama to 2 shelter dogs;  cloth diapering, babywearing, EBFing mama

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  • SinafeySinafey member

    Hi, welcome!  Chill out with the mommy guild :P  Nobody's using a checklist to see if you measure up.  Almost everybody here is pretty AP-lite, and everybody is super nice and welcoming in my experience.  

    I think AP is great for working moms!  I'm a SAHM now, but I worked 60+ hour weeks consistently from the time that DD was 2-9 months.  Without the AP philosophy I don't know if we really would have developed much of a bond for all of those months.  

    Where in TX are you?  There are a lot of babywearing groups around.  If you would like to give it another shot I highly recommend trying to find a group so that you can try out a bunch of different carriers.  I've had back and shoulder problems forever, but with the right carry and carrier most of the pain can be avoided.

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  • StrawberryAlarmClockStrawberryAlarmClock member
    I agree with these mamas. There are no rules. You sound like a great mama! Welcome. Please don't ever hesitate to post :)
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  • astroMomastroMom member
    awesome...any other books or even better...online resources you like?  Is there an FAQ for this board?   I didn't see it.

    DS born 8/2010 - preliminary stages of SN int'l adoption - fur mama to 2 shelter dogs;  cloth diapering, babywearing, EBFing mama

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  • astroMomastroMom member
    imageSinafey:

    Where in TX are you?  There are a lot of babywearing groups around.  If you would like to give it another shot I highly recommend trying to find a group so that you can try out a bunch of different carriers.  I've had back and shoulder problems forever, but with the right carry and carrier most of the pain can be avoided.

    Austin, too!

    DS born 8/2010 - preliminary stages of SN int'l adoption - fur mama to 2 shelter dogs;  cloth diapering, babywearing, EBFing mama

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