I was just told I need to baby proof my house.

ondjima · April 2011

Some friends were over and their very very badly behaved child broke one of willow tree statues. I was told I need to baby proof my house, and that I would know how stressful it is to take your kids to someone's house if I had my own child.

This is a person who knows about our IF, and who flew out here to Namibia to do counseling. (our church sends someone out after the first year) He is staying in our house until Thursday.

I had to go cry in the bathroom in my own house.

OCW2010 · April 2011

Wtf? How disrespectful and cruel.

I'm sorry. Sad

farmerlynda · April 2011

So sorry! ?What a jerk...

ondjima · April 2011

OCW2010:
Wtf? How disrespectful and cruel.
I'm sorry.

I know. And I just have to stand there and take it. Cruel is the right word to use to describe what just happened. Then he goes on to tell us how their toddler stuck something in someone's VCR once. So I guess by his logic everyone on earth should baby proof their homes so that other people's badly behaved kids can do whatever the hell they want.

OCW2010 · April 2011

ondjima:
OCW2010:
Wtf? How disrespectful and cruel.
I'm sorry.
I know. And I just have to stand there and take it. Cruel is the right word to use to describe what just happened. Then he goes on to tell us how their toddler stuck something in someone's VCR once. So I guess by his logic everyone on earth should baby proof their homes so that other people's badly behaved kids can do whatever the hell they want.

Seriously, wtf is wrong with some people. Seriously.

faydre · April 2011

That's total BS!!! Im sorry he saidnsuch a thing to you.

maybebride · April 2011

I am so, so sorry you had to endure that. Hopefully this person thinks about what he said and can apologize. I cannot imagine someone saying something that heartless when they know your situation.

cutebride73 · April 2011

I am pretty sure that if someone said that to me in my house, I would have said something like - "perhaps you need to just watch your child" or "maybe if you knew how to discipline, then it wouldn't be an issue."

That is just so rude!! How dare they come into your house, as a guest and say that?! It is a parent's job to watch their child, no matter where they are or what the circumstances. Would they tell a priest or minister to to put out all the candles in church because the child might touch them and burn themself? I think not.

While I may keep my house guests in mind and make some adjustments, I wouldn't expect to have to pack away all of my belongings. Seriously. Just rude.

kpirelli · April 2011

Absolutely horrible! How rude! Hugs...

ondjima · April 2011

cutebride73:
I am pretty sure that if someone said that to me in my house, I would have said something like - "perhaps you need to just watch your child" or "maybe if you knew how to discipline, then it wouldn't be an issue."

That is just so rude!! How dare they come into your house, as a guest and say that?! It is a parent's job to watch their child, no matter where they are or what the circumstances. Would they tell a priest or minister to to put out all the candles in church because the child might touch them and burn themself? I think not.

While I may keep my house guests in mind and make some adjustments, I wouldn't expect to have to pack away all of my belongings. Seriously. Just rude.

He made a big deal about how uncomfortable they seemed. As far as I am concerned they can just stay home from now on. If my house is so awful that they are so uncomfortable this guy feels the need to comment on it, then they can just never come here again.

I think I am more irritated by it because the people with the kids are jerks too.

I am Marla Singer · April 2011

Whoa... NOT COOL. I would have thrown a freaking fit... What did you say? I agree- WATCH your kids... I have a friend with 3 kids- and they are terrorists. I can't have them over at my house because the parents don't discipline them AT ALL. I feel bad- but I don't have a kid, and if I did, I would watch him/her like a hawk...

I'm sorry!

ondjima · April 2011

She is almost two. After she broke it she was not disciplined at all. She was given a toy and taken outside to play. They did not say No! Or ANYTHING like that.

Utterly ridiculous.

amor_eterno · April 2011

ondjima:
OCW2010:
Wtf? How disrespectful and cruel.
I'm sorry.
I know. And I just have to stand there and take it. Cruel is the right word to use to describe what just happened. Then he goes on to tell us how their toddler stuck something in someone's VCR once. So I guess by his logic everyone on earth should baby proof their homes so that other people's badly behaved kids can do whatever the hell they want.

I'm so sorry, people can be such jackassses! Can I just ask though, why do you feel that you have to "stand there and take it?" I don't think you would need to respond rudely, but this is your house and there's no need to allow someone to make you feel like this in your home.

adaisybug · April 2011

I am so sorry.

I would have said something along the lines of "it wouldnt be so stressful taking your child to someone elses house if you would parent your child".

That sucks.

Jewlz018 · April 2011

A counselor that has no home training..how rude!

Sorry ondjima. ::hugs::

LindzK · April 2011

ondjima:

She is almost two. After she broke it she was not disciplined at all. She was given a toy and taken outside to play. They did not say No! Or ANYTHING like that.

Utterly ridiculous.

OMG! I probably would have said something to the parents...asking if they were planning on discipling her? And if not, made some smug comment about kids not having manners these days.

I'm so sorry that people are so rude. They need to teach kids how to behave and have manners. Kids need to know when to apologize, and they'll never learn unless their parents tell them.

mbiondich · April 2011

I would have probably flipped out! Not only is it insensitive and disrespectful, but how can they blame you for their child's behavior? I can't imagine that they would be able to take their children into a store or restaurant even if one is expected to remove anything of value or something that may break when the child comes over! A complete lack of parenting and teaching a child how to respect things and property! I would have suggested they seek other accomodations for the rest of their stay if how my home was presented was so unsatisfactory to them! I am so sorry this happened to you! T and P from my family to help you get through the next few days! And hopefully they get some sensitivity training!!

hunterjumper102 · April 2011

Wow! I am sorry you had to endure that. I think I would have said something to the parents. Did they even apoligize for the kid breaking something of yours? People can be so rude and disrespectful.

niknak1128 · April 2011

That's horrible. So sorry. I would have to boot him after that.

lckcdc3 · April 2011

WOW. Some people are complete morons. Watch your own damn kid! And if you dont know how, then maybe you should stay home in your "baby proofed' padded walls. geezus. Sorry you had to deal with that.

Cheetara2 · April 2011

I promise you, some people just don't think before they speak. As if it's your fault their kids are unruly. So sorry you had to deal with that

allie76 · April 2011

What a douchebag! He needs to supervise his own child. Sometimes, fertility is wasted on the stupid.

b2b999 · April 2011

It sounds like you handled that with a lot more grace then i would have. Personally i would have recommended that he watch and discipline his child.

besu-chan · April 2011

ugh. this has happened to me before, although they don't know about our IF. they told us we should have a different coffee table (ours has a glass top) so that they don't have to worry about baby. they also commented "oh, you don't have any toys here do you? you should probably get some...." seriously? you want me to provide toys for your baby? anyway, I feel your pain. I guess there are a lot of parents out there who expect their friends to help with the parenting of their children?!?

ondjima · April 2011

Thanks ladies. I spent the morning crying and feeling sorry for myself while writing about NIAW.

I think I would have jumped off a bridge a long time ago without you ladies, thank you form the bottom of my heart for listening and sympathizing!

FyreFry5 · April 2011

Oh HE7L no. That is completely ridiculous. I can't even believe somebody would recommend to another person that they should baby-proof their house, much less say "well if you had a kid, you wouldn't understand". Especially when they know what you are going through.

Sort of makes me want to punch stuff. Jerk.

Sorry that happened

Jezebell26 · April 2011

UGH im so sorry! That is not something you say to anyone else, none the less someone in your position! Honestly, my child will be taught to be respectful of other people's things so that when we go somewhere else they know not to touch what is not theirs. But unfortunately they just feel you should accommodate them and bubble wrap your house so their kid can do what they please....sigh...HUGS to you!

ondjima · April 2011

Jezebell26:
UGH im so sorry! That is not something you say to anyone else, none the less someone in your position! Honestly, my child will be taught to be respectful of other people's things so that when we go somewhere else they know not to touch what is not theirs. But unfortunately they just feel you should accommodate them and bubble wrap your house so their kid can do what they please....sigh...HUGS to you!

I just keep thinking if you can train a monkey to not touch certain things, can you not also train a child?

FyreFry5 · April 2011

ondjima:
Jezebell26:
UGH im so sorry! That is not something you say to anyone else, none the less someone in your position! Honestly, my child will be taught to be respectful of other people's things so that when we go somewhere else they know not to touch what is not theirs. But unfortunately they just feel you should accommodate them and bubble wrap your house so their kid can do what they please....sigh...HUGS to you!

I just keep thinking if you can train a monkey to not touch certain things, can you not also train a child?

How old was this kid? I can sort of see how a toddler could get into things, regardless of how well- or poorly-behaved he usually is. However, it is the parents' responsibility to either keep that child close by to prevent things like that from happening, or to get them the hel! out of there. If they were in a store and the kid was touching and grabbing and breaking things, they'd leave (hopefully). They wouldn't tell the store to baby proof their china.

Glowconsin · April 2011

That is absolutely unacceptable. I would have told them if they don't find my house suitable for THEIR child, it's ok to find other arrangements.

I'm so sorry, love, that you had to go through that.

What absolutely, ignorant, short sighted, thoughtless people.

I know it doesn't help much, but I love ya and think you are beyond fanstastic!

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