2nd Trimester

How dare he say that!!! (boss/work vent)

So things have been getting kind of bad for me at work... my boss is a prick and saying he is not sure if I am actually doing my job.. and dumb stuff like that... this morning though just topped everything off.. And I have NOO problem telling him to kiss my ass and leave!! 

We were all sitting at the counter and they were having coffee.. and they are talking about the baby.... ( I wore a tight shirt today.. because my boss has said he thinks it looks tacky when women do that.. so I made sure I got a nice tight shirt to wear today...hahah) anyway so they are talking about how big my belly is getting.. and he says TO ME.... " you ruined a perfectly good body" and instantly I blurted out "F*CK YOU"... and the other boss didn't hear so hes asking huh? what? and I told him what he said and what I said and he says.. that wasn't nice.. and I said that wasn't nice either!  The girl I work with had to walk away because she was laughing so hard!!!     I just can not believe some of the *** that comes out of peoples mouths... how dare he say that!!!! 

I have a job where I am in my car most of the day.. so while I was driving around this morning I could not stop thinking about it and what I could have/should have said!!! But those words I did say.. were the only things I could say because I was soo mad!!!    UUUGHHH!!!    

Thanks.. I had to get that off my chest because I can't tell my DH for fear he will go and knock him out (literally)....   or my mother for that matter!

 

P.S.  Happy Good Friday..  and my baby is the size of an onion!!! YAY!! 

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Re: How dare he say that!!! (boss/work vent)

  • It will just feel that much better when he sees you pp and you look fantastic. DS is 6 months old and my pre-preggo clothes are too big! what a jerk your boss is!
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  • I do believe that you can go to HR about that.
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  • WOW! That is totaly uncalled for! I think that you held yourself back pretty good. I sure as hell would have blown up completely!!
  • That is weird boss/employee communication on both your parts.
  • Well there is not an HR at my work.. its a small business that has 4 full time employees and we have no vacation or sick days or anything like that... 
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  • What your boss said is definitely crossing the line, and I would be furious.

    But, if you want to be treated professionally at work, then you need to act professional.  Wearing a tight shirt (which is pretty much a no-no in any profession) out of spite, doesn't make you seem like you take your job seriously.  And the way you responded to your boss was out of line... two wrongs, don't make a right.  And it doesn't make you look good to HR, if you were to file a complaint.  

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  • imagejenna0627:
    That is weird boss/employee communication on both your parts.

     

    yeah I know.. my work is small and casual..  usually friendly...  

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  • imageJen10702:

    imagejenna0627:
    That is weird boss/employee communication on both your parts.

     

    yeah I know.. my work is small and casual..  usually friendly...  

    Honestly it sounds completely opposite of friendly. It sounds like high school. In normal work situations, employees don't do things they know are wrong (wear a tight shirt to get a reaction) and the boss doesn't make those comments and if they did, one certainly doesn't fire back with the F bomb.

  • That boarders on sexual harassment.
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  • imageMrsM1113:

    What your boss said is definitely crossing the line, and I would be furious.

    But, if you want to be treated professionally at work, then you need to act professional.  Wearing a tight shirt (which is pretty much a no-no in any profession) out of spite, doesn't make you seem like you take your job seriously.  And the way you responded to your boss was out of line... two wrongs, don't make a right.  And it doesn't make you look good to HR, if you were to file a complaint.  

    my work is not a professional work place and thats not what I was after.. and yes I mis-typed... It was like a tight shirt like teenaged girls wear.. its a shirt that my belly really shows in unlike some of more flow-y ones I wear.... which is not unprofessional...  sorry but the belly is going to show... 

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  • I worship you. Sometimes, I wish I had the guts to just come out and say fvck you.

    I'm sorry your boss is such a prick. 

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  • Yeah, I'd like to know what you do... because everything your boss said and you said is completely unprofessional.  I work in a pretty laid back office setting, but I would never speak to my boss that way, joking or not... and I would expect my boss to not disrespect me in the way yours did! I guess I've just never heard of such an odd boss/employee relationship? His comment was definitely sexual harrassment, but sounds like your company not having an HR really doesn't help!
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  • imageJen10702:
    Well there is not an HR at my work.. its a small business that has 4 full time employees and we have no vacation or sick days or anything like that... 

    Then I think you handled it perfectly!

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  • Work, by nature is professional.  An office can be casual, laid back, etc., but should still remain professional.  When people (not just you and your boss) begin to blend the lines between appropriate office behavior and act as you do among friends, that is when a work place becomes unprofessional.  No matter how casual your office, you can still conduct yourself in a professional manner.

    And I'm sorry, but a tight t-shirt that teenage girls wear are a.) for teenage girls, and b.) never appropriate in any work.  Your belly showing isn't unprofessional, nor is it tacky.  But the office isn't the place to wear your Abercrombie and Fitch tees, and dressing like a 16 year old sends the message to everyone at your work that you're not serious about your work. 

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  • imagejenna0627:
    That is weird boss/employee communication on both your parts.

    That's what I was thinking.

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  • imageMrsM1113:

    Work, by nature is professional.  An office can be casual, laid back, etc., but should still remain professional.  When people (not just you and your boss) begin to blend the lines between appropriate office behavior and act as you do among friends, that is when a work place becomes unprofessional.  No matter how casual your office, you can still conduct yourself in a professional manner.

    And I'm sorry, but a tight t-shirt that teenage girls wear are a.) for teenage girls, and b.) never appropriate in any work.  Your belly showing isn't unprofessional, nor is it tacky.  But the office isn't the place to wear your Abercrombie and Fitch tees, and dressing like a 16 year old sends the message to everyone at your work that you're not serious about your work. 

    ok maybe this is getting complicated because it is the internet (lol)  but.. your telling me my bump showing like this ( pic below) is inappropriate?

     

    Product.asp.jpg 

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  • imagejenna0627:
    That is weird boss/employee communication on both your parts.

    this 

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  • ok apparently I don't know what I'm doing on here and can't paste a picture in my post... so if you care... this is the website for that picture

    https://www.motherhood.com/Product.asp?Product_Id=92415Z10011&MasterCategory_Id=MC2

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  •  haha ok apparently I don't know what I'm doing on here and can't paste a picture in my post... so if you care... this is the website for that picture

    https://www.motherhood.com/Product.asp?Product_Id=92415Z10011&MasterCategory_Id=MC2

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  • Your boss sounds likea  jerk.  BUT - if you were my employee, you would have been fired for your response.
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  • imageJen10702:
    ok maybe this is getting complicated because it is the internet (lol)  but.. your telling me my bump showing like this ( pic below) is inappropriate?

     

    Product.asp.jpg 

    We can't see your pic (or at least I can't). And no, that's the opposite of what she said.

    image Don't argue with idiots, they bring you down to their level then beat you with experience. - Mrs. G
  • I think in a casual workplace, that shirt would be fine.

    But it's a far cry from a t-shirt like the teenage girls wear, which makes me think of this:

     

     

    image

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  • imageMrsM1113:

    I think in a casual workplace, that shirt would be fine.

    But it's a far cry from a t-shirt like the teenage girls wear, which makes me think of this:

     

     

    image

    This is exactly what I was picturing.

  • There is a whole lot wrong with that situation and it isn't just your boss.
    image
    Annelise 3.22.2007 Norah 10.24.2009 Amelia 8.7.2011
  • imageJen10702:
    imageMrsM1113:

    What your boss said is definitely crossing the line, and I would be furious.

    But, if you want to be treated professionally at work, then you need to act professional.  Wearing a tight shirt (which is pretty much a no-no in any profession) out of spite, doesn't make you seem like you take your job seriously.  And the way you responded to your boss was out of line... two wrongs, don't make a right.  And it doesn't make you look good to HR, if you were to file a complaint.  

    my work is not a professional work place and thats not what I was after.. and yes I mis-typed... It was like a tight shirt like teenaged girls wear.. its a shirt that my belly really shows in unlike some of more flow-y ones I wear.... which is not unprofessional...  sorry but the belly is going to show... 

     

    ok LMAO.. it is suppose to say " It was NOT like a tight shirt like teenaged girls wear"   My bad... silly silly.. or pregnancy brain.. not sure !  

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  • As someone who is self employed and looking at having employees at some point, you both would have been reprimanded, but definitely him more for making SUCH an inappropriate comment.

    As someone who has been in unhealthy work environments where HR is useless or nonexistent, I fist bump you in solidarity. You did what you had to do.

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  • I LOL'd when I saw you said fvck you.  I'm glad you stuck up for yourself, but be careful about making such an inappropriate work place even more inappropriate.

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  • You should really tell HR what he said.  That is sexual harassment by definition.  He should not be allowed to talk to any employee like that.
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  • I've worked at a VERY small company before and the environment sounds similar to yours. The owner/boss talked to all his employees HOWEVER he wanted.. and when there is no HR dept. and he is the owner, he pretty much can get away with whatever he wants. I guess someone could go and sue him or something..but who would go through that effort? Either just find a way to ignore his comments, or find a new job. When I worked with my boss like that I just felt like he was a complete idiot and every time he said something rude I just laughed and thought 'what a moron'. Just try not to take offense to people's idiotic comments..it's really not worth your time or energy.
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  • imageamy0610:

    As someone who is self employed and looking at having employees at some point, you both would have been reprimanded, but definitely him more for making SUCH an inappropriate comment.

     

    I'd have reprimanded the boss, but feel the fvck you was justified. I'm a laid back and very easy going person, but his comment was rude, out of line, hurtful, disgraceful, tasteless, etc., etc.  

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  • Wow, I think you should talk to your other boss and say that you need to be treated with more respect.  He definitely crossed the line. 

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  • Thank you, your story makes me happy.  I have a co-worker that I had to call fat before he would stop commenting during my first tri-mester on my ' new baggy clothes," which were the basic work dresses and skirts I had been wearing for the last 2 years at work.  Some people have to realize, don't mess with the pregnant hormonal lady. :)
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