Pre-School and Daycare
New here and a bedtime/sleep question
Hi everyone! I'm not sure why I haven't posted here before, but I guess better late than never.
My question is how do you deal with the "I'm scared" stuff. We're going on 8 or 9 months of it and I've reached my breaking point. We've tried everything from laying with her, checking her room, night lights, etc. I just want to quit having bedtime drug out for hours which results in tears and now waking the baby. I'm so exhausted after putting her back to bed a million times and getting the baby back to sleep. TIA
My question is how do you deal with the "I'm scared" stuff. We're going on 8 or 9 months of it and I've reached my breaking point. We've tried everything from laying with her, checking her room, night lights, etc. I just want to quit having bedtime drug out for hours which results in tears and now waking the baby. I'm so exhausted after putting her back to bed a million times and getting the baby back to sleep. TIA
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Re: New here and a bedtime/sleep question
A few things that you may have already tried:
1. Does she still take a nap? If so try going without it. If she's not tired she's got too much time on her hands to let her imagination run wild. When we delt with this issue it was mostly on the nights it would take him a LONG time to fall asleep. If he sacked out fast it wasn't an issue.
2. Monster spray. A can of Lysol disinfectant spray worked wonders for us. Extra squirts for under the bed and in the closet. We'd also discuss what the monsters that he was afraid of looked like and I'd go on to tell him that it was physically impossible for THAT kinda monster to be in his room because it wouldn't fit thru the door or couldn't climb the stairs to his room, etc.
3. Night light. We're not fans of them due to potential vision issues but we did put one in there until the scared phase passed and then removed it when he didn't seem to need it any more.
4. Tell her you're done coming in for the night. If she's used to getting you to come back in for various reasons you've just got to rip that band aid off. I'd tell him that I was putting up a special monster force field around his door and I didn't want to break the seal so he needed to stay in his bed and I'd see him in the morning. Then when she asks for you - don't answer or go in. Shut off all the lights in the house so it appears everyone's gone to sleep.
I know this is tuff stuff. Hope you get some relief soon.
And... welcome!
Total score: 6 pregnancies, 5 losses, 2 amazing blessings that I'm thankful for every single day.
Ditto Howleyshell, except we don't use Lysol. We use a spray container filled with water and a few drops of lavendar essential oil (also helps to calm you). The spray bottle is left with the child so that if they feel the need, they can use it themselves. I only fill it about 1/4-1/3 of the way in case they get "spray happy".
None of my kids napped past age 2, so they are pretty tired when it's bedtime.
I'm semi afraid to do the lysol trick, because we've always stuck with the "there is no such thing as monsters" but I'm willing to try anything. Obviously what we're doing isn't working.
As for telling her I won't be coming back, I've done that and it results in the hysterical crying, which wakes the baby up. Their rooms are right next to each other. H and I have honestly discussed trading rooms with her until this passes so her constant wakings don't affect the baby
Thanks for the advice!!!
As for dropping the nap - you have to more her bed time up by at least an hour if you go without a nap to avoid the melt down thing. Also - add a snack at nap time to give her the energy to get to bed time.
As for the waking each other up? Mine are 17 months apart and across the hall from each other. We used a sound machine in each room (white noise), ran the fan in the bathroom and put a box fan in the hall way. It sounded like a freight train in our house but they never once woke the other up.
I don't see how you're gonna end this without some tears.
Total score: 6 pregnancies, 5 losses, 2 amazing blessings that I'm thankful for every single day.
We have been going through the exact same thing. DD has a nightlight, a flashlight, her door is wide open, and the hall light is on. She still tells us to make sure no monsters or bugs come in her room. About a month ago we started letting the dog, Nickels, sleep in bed with her, but then Nickels would get down and couldn't get back up so she would bark and wake us all up. So now, the dog just starts out sleeping with her and Nickels comes into our room with us when we go to bed.
DD likes to dress up like a princess, so I started telling her earlier this week to picture the monsters/bugs in a tiara and tutu and high heels (cuz did you know that monsters can't walk in high heels) to make it funny instead of scary. So far, it seems to be working. Now, if we can just get the thunder to quiet down at night we'd be able to finally sleep through the night again! Good luck!