Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
Re: Weekend Update: Douchey Things My Ex Did This Week
WOW that is some crazy shii!
EX had checked himself into rehab last week. and then checked himself back out 5 days later...now he's trying to sell his phone to get money so he can take off. I hope he does abscond to somewhere far far away.
Becca- yes he's a major idiot.
And Ashley- Abscond.... good word! I am currently hooked on the words with friends app. heh. always looking for good new words.
OMG WHAT he is such a freakshow. Jeebus.
Mine hacked into my email and FB, as you know. Fun times.
Woah. That's crazy.
My exFI and trying to hammer out details in our custody agreement since we are going back to mediation this summer. We are done talking now though. He's all over the place. He doesn't want to pay health/dental cost 50/50 since I'm rotting Jake's teeth by giving him chicken nuggets once a week. Oh, and since I've had him in Germany for 9 months and he hasn't seen him. He wants full custody for 5 months with no visitation from me.
And he acts like I need to bend over backwards for him since he's "letting" me move out of the province. If I don't agree, he'll make me stay. Um. No. You already signed an agreement allowing me to move, plus, I live in Germany. I no longer live in the province, you can't make me move back.
OMG! CHICKEN NUGGETS! How dare you. Heh. And also, he probably doesn't have much say- I don't know what the laws are in germany or canada but here in NY- you can't just kick someone off your insurance, so he might have to pay anyway.
And wow- 5 mo. no visitation? Really? That will never fly.
It sounds like he is just spewing hatred in your general direction- and I am sure it is totally stressing you out.
Sorry, mama.
And julesey- yeah- thats horrible that he hacked into your fb and emails. What a lunatic. I think he is related to those dinosaurs he studies- specifically the stegasaurus- who is known for having a golf ball sized brain.
Don't be so sure. Another SP who lived out of the country with her DD had to appeal and fight custody after her X was awarded joint custody, as in, 6 months with the father, 6 months with the mother. They live over 2000 miles apart, so every other week/weekend wasn't an option.
OMG. That's not good.
That would be so hard to be away from DS for that long.
I do understand if we would stay international. But come this summer, we'll be 4 hours apart. So even if he went through going to court to fight me for custody, I doubt he could get 5 months custody without visitation. This is hardly a tit for tat issue.
Well, since I have a PO against him I don't have direct communication with him so my mom is the "in-between" for now.
STBXH said he didn't have any money to help pay for DS's hospital bill (he was in the NICU for a couple days). Two days after he said he was broke, I got a letter in the mail from Best Buy congratulating "us" on "our" new 46" 3D TV that he purchased for $2,300.
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Beta #1: 4/1 - 51.5 Beta #2: 4/3 - 189 Beta #3: 4/6 - 778.9
AMH: 1.06 FSH: 10.7
DS: 11/2010 Clomid + HCG Trigger + IUI + Progesterone
oh wow... so he's not beyond committing fraud and forging your signature on a credit application... he sounds dumb. REALLY dumb. You'll definitely be able to get that taken care of.
How frustrating. My ex would do something like that also.
Yep...taking care of this as we speak.
I think he will too
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Beta #1: 4/1 - 51.5 Beta #2: 4/3 - 189 Beta #3: 4/6 - 778.9
AMH: 1.06 FSH: 10.7
DS: 11/2010 Clomid + HCG Trigger + IUI + Progesterone
Good!!! I am glad you're getting it taken care of. What would really be funny is if you got the TV. He would be supah upset - clearly he puts major emphasis on it... so it would be devastating to him if you repo'd it. heh
hey maybe if you can find some way to get the tv, and sell it, it can help with the NICU debt. btw, sorry you had to go through a NICU experience. that has got to be so freaking scary.
Meh- He can keep the 3D TV....I don't look good in electronic goggles....
::flips hair::
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Beta #1: 4/1 - 51.5 Beta #2: 4/3 - 189 Beta #3: 4/6 - 778.9
AMH: 1.06 FSH: 10.7
DS: 11/2010 Clomid + HCG Trigger + IUI + Progesterone
SHUT UP! he wasted that much on a 3d tv???!! WOW. I am a techie snob.... let's just put it this way- if I were dating someone who invested that much money in a bad technology, it would be a major red flag to me.
heh. you're better off without the goggles!