Maybe Cafe Press finds this t-shirt humorous

lisanjay · April 2011

But think it is hurtful and distasteful.

https://www.cafepress.com/+adopt_a_child_tee,474600292?fb_comment_id=fbc_10150150455018341_15841248_10150150680358341

wille2b · April 2011

extremely distasteful!

Temp206787500007404 · April 2011

You can email them (include a link to the product ID or original image url) at cup@cafepress.com to express your dissatisfaction.

lisanjay · April 2011

Here is another link to let them know what you think

https://help.cafepress.com/hc/s-74058960/cmd/kbresource/kb-1804203884198893827/escalate!PAGETYPE?VisitorProfile=cafepress

mom2emb · April 2011

I just sent an e-mail. Very offensive.

beaureve · April 2011

That's awful. I am going to complain too.

Mrs_Liberto · April 2011

I agree that the shirt is distasteful, but CafePress is user-submitted designs and quite frankly there are a LOT more disturbing shirts on there than that one.It's like Amazon or Ebay in that anyone can create/sell through them. And they have a content disclaimer specifically for scenarios like this.

CafePress provides users complete e-commerce tools needed to create and sell a wide variety of products featuring their ideas, designs and art. All merchandise content is created by users of the CafePress Service and does not necessarily reflect the opinions and views of CafePress.com.

Cissi64 · April 2011

Disgusting! But after what Mrs Liberty posted I'm not sure it sould do any good to complain. Companies seem to think that disclaimers absolve them from having any tastor decency!

silliestbunny · April 2011

Yuck!

lisanjay · April 2011

Yes, Cafe Press may hide behind their disclaimer, but I believe that if we choose not to voice our opinion then it says that it is ok to have products such as this. Amazon recently tried to hide behind their disclaimer and not remove a book, but evventually so many people wrote in and they finally chose to take it off their site.

Temp206787500007404 · April 2011

They do have that disclaimer, but they also have a list of prohibited items and it includes images of children that could be considered exploitative, or any image that would offend large groups of people and personally I think the adoption community qualifies as a large group of people.

I would be so sad if my DD or her birthmother ever came across this shirt.

FinallyMrs.G · April 2011

beaureve:
That's awful. I am going to complain too.

Me too! I am disappointed in Cafe press.

Patches08 · April 2011

Completely horrid.

Mrs_Liberto · April 2011

lisanjay:
Yes, Cafe Press may hide behind their disclaimer, but I believe that if we choose not to voice our opinion then it says that it is ok to have products such as this. Amazon recently tried to hide behind their disclaimer and not remove a book, but evventually so many people wrote in and they finally chose to take it off their site.

Um, I there's a HUGE difference between a how-to manual on molesting a child that was easily accessible via Kindle download (which is what the Amazon outcry was about) and a stupid t-shirt. I think the shirt is dumb, but if you're going to take on CafePress re: offensive t-shirts, here are two more out of probably thousands:

https://www.cafepress.com/+i_dont_know_im_adopted_baby_onesie,216331031

https://www.cafepress.com/+all_daddy_wanted_was_a_bj_baby_onesie,192299341

And again, companies aren't hiding behind a disclaimer. It's just not their job, on a user-generated site, to police anything that could potentially be offensive. That's called censorship and I'm reasonably certain that no one wants it.

Maybe I'm just excited to see 29,000!! adoption-related designs on CafePress, and only a couple crappy ones, but I just can't get any more worked up about this than I would if someone told me to "just adopt" or any number of stupid comments that ignorant people say on a regular basis. Someone just happened this time to put their stupid thoughts on a t-shirt.

ETA: Here's a few other sites that talk about ridiculous adoption shirts:

https://chinaadoptiontalk.blogspot.com/2010/12/paper-pregnancy-country-ultrasounds.html

https://www.productionnotreproduction.com/2010/02/my-t-shirt-today-is-solid-grey.html

https://loveisntenough.com/2008/03/19/why-oh-why-are-these-t-shirts-still-available-2/

(Random side note/potentially hot topic: I've seen several people here use the phrase 'paper pregnant' in their sigs, but there are hundreds of sites talking about how offensive that phrase is too... maybe we need to get our own 'house' in order if we are really concerned about offending people in the adoption triad.)

Temp206787500007404 · April 2011

If it doesn't bother you, that's fine. Move on and stop defending them here, because obviously it does offend quite a few of us.

And I think there's a huge difference between what is expressed on this shirt and the two you posted. Those two are in poor taste, sure. But they aren't offensive to the entire adoption community basically saying you can get rid of a kid anytime you want/making light of adoption...we have to deal with enough bias when people hear about AP's dissolving adoptions, putting their kid on a plane back to Russia, giving their child to another family to adopt, etc. Let's have real conversations about the issues, not make fun of them. Our children aren't accessories that we can trade in or return if we decide they aren't working out for us at some point.

Mrs_Liberto · April 2011

MrsB2007:
If it doesn't bother you, that's fine. Move on and stop defending them here, because obviously it does offend quite a few of us.
And I think there's a huge difference between what is expressed on this shirt and the two you posted. Those two are in poor taste, sure. But they aren't offensive to the entire adoption community basically saying you can get rid of a kid anytime you want/making light of adoption...we have to deal with enough bias when people hear about AP's dissolving adoptions, putting their kid on a plane back to Russia, giving their child to another family to adopt, etc. Let's have real conversations about the issues, not make fun of them. Our children aren't accessories that we can trade in or return if we decide they aren't working out for us at some point.

OK, but my point again is that there are LOTS of offensive shirts on cafe press-- what about ones that say things like " I AM the real mom!!"? They're certainly offensive to first moms. Are you going to email CafePress and a dozen other internet tshirt retailers to get those removed too, since you want to protect the adoption community? Are you going to have conversations about positive adoption language to use INSTEAD of 'real mom'? I'm asking rhetorical questions here, but I think they're important.

And again, I am in no way defending the shirt because I think it's ridiculous too. I don't know how many times I have said that now.

Oh and it looks like it's already been removed from CafePress.

Temp206787500007404 · April 2011

If someone posted another shirt here that was offensive to the adoption community in some way, yes, I would report it too. I'm not going to go picket their headquarters, but I will definitely fill out a simple email form.

Like some else posted previously -- if we just sit and do nothing, nothing happens. If more people speak up about things that aren't right, maybe they'll get changed. Maybe nothing happens. But at least we did something.

cole'swishes · April 2011

I just sent an email as well. I agree at least I did something which is a ton better than nothing.

silliestbunny · April 2011

A bit off topic---- but as a regular poster, I have not seen anyone use "paper pregnant" in quite a while. While it doesn't offend me, I always thought it was a sort of strange term.

I am sure we could spend time nit-picking posts and terms but "paper pregnant" is not one that is routinely used... at least by regular posters.

erinms · April 2011

Umm, how could anyone find that funny?

Seriously, it seems like someone is being intentionally cruel.

soon2Bkranz · April 2011

That makes me sick...I will email also. I will never spend with them again. I bought so many of my pro-adoption...pregnant on paper shirts from them....GROSS I am also goign to link on facebook and try to get friends to email also

soon2Bkranz · April 2011

Mrs_Liberto:
MrsB2007:

If it doesn't bother you, that's fine. Move on and stop defending them here, because obviously it does offend quite a few of us.

And I think there's a huge difference between what is expressed on this shirt and the two you posted. Those two are in poor taste, sure. But they aren't offensive to the entire adoption community basically saying you can get rid of a kid anytime you want/making light of adoption...we have to deal with enough bias when people hear about AP's dissolving adoptions, putting their kid on a plane back to Russia, giving their child to another family to adopt, etc. Let's have real conversations about the issues, not make fun of them. Our children aren't accessories that we can trade in or return if we decide they aren't working out for us at some point.

OK, but my point again is that there are LOTS of offensive shirts on cafe press-- what about ones that say things like " I AM the real mom!!"? They're certainly offensive to first moms. Are you going to email CafePress and a dozen other internet tshirt retailers to get those removed too, since you want to protect the adoption community? Are you going to have conversations about positive adoption language to use INSTEAD of 'real mom'? I'm asking rhetorical questions here, but I think they're important.

And again, I am in no way defending the shirt because I think it's ridiculous too. I don't know how many times I have said that now.

Oh and it looks like it's already been removed from CafePress.

Do I think a lone voice can bring down a company like CafePress...no...BUt I know I wont spend my money there and will and encourage my friends/family to do the same. Even if it makes no "impact" to me that doesnt always have to be the point sometimes the point is just doing adn standing for whats right.

And I think if enough people make a "fuss" it will bring to light the discussion of pro adoption language. I likes the term paper pregnant. But I refuse to say adopt a park or a street etc...So to each their own with somethings.

swanck · April 2011

SO NOT OKAY!

jenn5-26-07 · April 2011

not only is the "send them back" part offensive, but the whole child/slave labor thing??? Would any one rasing their biological child want to advertise they only had a child to do maid service? They why is it ok to insinuate that's the only reason I had children?????

TiffanyBlue927 · April 2011

MrsB2007:
They do have that disclaimer, but they also have a list of prohibited items and it includes images of children that could be considered exploitative, or any image that would offend large groups of people and personally I think the adoption community qualifies as a large group of people.
I would be so sad if my DD or her birthmother ever came across this shirt.

This .....exactly.... I just wrote a very strong comment on that site as well.

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