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terrified

fluttersmomfluttersmom
in High-Risk Pregnancy

I took a preg test this morning, not b/c I thought I was, but b/c I was late (which isn't unusal for me) and I figured if I went ahead and took it, saw the negative response, then I'd go ahead and start my period. Well, the test was positive & I've been freaking out. I had my first child in 03, a perfecly healthy pregnancy which resulted in a perfectly healthy daughter.  However, before she was a year old, I had miscarried twice (one passed on its own, the other required a D&C).  These factored into a nasty divorce. Now I"m remarried, and my new (wonderful) husband & I welcomed a healthy daughter in 07, althought the pregnancy was overshadowed by an enormous blood clot that noone thought my daughter could make it through.  Well, in 09 we tried again, got preg w/twins.  I lost one at 7 weeks and the other at 12 weeks. My husband & I had been trying, but gave up several months ago when a car wreck caused him to need major back surgery.  Now I'm pregnant again, and while I want this baby, I can't stop crying b/c I'm so afraid of loosing another --the 5th--baby. I know Doc will put me on hormones, but that hasnt' always worked. And now I'm 32, so I'm afraid age isnt' in my favor either. But like others have said, I don't want to tell everyone b/c of the heartache that comes w/telling them about a misscarraige. But on the other hand, I don't want to go through this alone. So here I am, I'm glad to have found this site. I'll keep updating between tears.

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Re: terrified

  • pnwmama11pnwmama11 member

    First of all, I'm so sorry for your losses ((hugs))

    I'm sure given your history, it's normal to be worried. Just try to relax, and maybe a visit to the Dr. will put your mind at ease? I'm sure they will have a game plan, and take good care of you. Also, 32 is young! :)

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  • jesh1111jesh1111 member

    I agree you need a game plan, which might include p17 shots and a cerclage.

    32 is still young, try to relax and see you ob soon!

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  • mama3115mama3115 member

    So sorry to hear about your losses, it is understandable that you'd be nervous.  Just try to relax and remember every pregnancy is different.  You will be in my thoughts. 

    You are in a good place, everyone here is very supportive and will be there anytime you want to talk. 

    Good luck and think happy thoughtsBig Smile

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  • BonjayBonjay member

    Sorry for your previous losses. I can completely understand why you are so nervous about this one. With your past history your doctor should be willing to see you sooner than ususal.  If I were you I would instist on being seen soon and ask to have some testing done. 

    Try to relax and think happy thoughts we are here for you any time you need to talk.

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